To believe that going on holiday is a privilege and not a right?

speedymama you are an angel that is a huge amount of money!!!!!!

Please don't give them any more your dh is right....as another poster said there is no lesson if others are bailing them out.

Even if they lose their home a family of four children will not end up on the streets. Take a big step back and let them sort themselves out hun.

I've never been on a package holiday yet.

I've been to Alnwick Castle - ages ago. Remember it being good though.

I do like visiting Wales - lucky enough to have family there so have plenty of excuses to go plus live in an area where loads of people go on holiday so get that for free all year round (well on top of normal living expenses) & it's quite central for a lot of places so day trips are good.

I want to go to Australia, New Zealand, Thailand.... lots and lots of places. My friend has just done a 6 month world tour & the places he went too looked fantastic.

I still think holidays are imtportant alhhough of course basci bills need to be paid. We are going to Florida this year with money that was put aside for jobs on the house. But i think thata holiday with the extended family is more important than having the perfect house. We will not look back at pride at our new bathroom but we can look back fondly at memories of our holiday. We have friends that have not been on holiday in years as they have sunk all their money in the house and their family seems so fragmented as a result.

We are very very lucky as DPs family live by the sea and have their own sailing boat

A caravan with 4 children..... it's my idea of hell. I'd rather stay at home.
When DS1 was born we couldn't afford a holiday, and he didn't see a beach untill he was 21/2. I accepted that as I had chosen to have a child an give up work that we cluoldn't afford luxuries.A beach holiday can be brilliant for the children though, and if she's doing it for them, then good for her.

Everyone needs some time out, However I do think that when there is no money for the basic needs in life then a holiday is a long way down the list of things to have.

Do you think she may just be looking for an escape from the reality of her life at the moment?

Do you think they could do one of the token things £9.50 in some of the "newspapers"

Also I am a semi stay at home mum, but when we wanted to go on a family ski holiday to Lapland, I got a job and paid the £2,500 for it.

We went to Alnick casle last year, great place but expensive to get into so be prepared.We looked for all the bits filmed and did the Harry Potter tour.

I've only read the OP but I'm with you, it's a privilege, not a right.

haven't been to Alnwick Castle but it is on our list for this year.

We really enjoyed Northumberland.

It's definitely on our list of possible holidays, especially because Alnwick Castle is used as some of the setting for Hogwarts School in the Harry Potter films .

Caravans, camping and some self-catering are pretty cheap.

I like it that if the children fall ill, we can use the NHS to treat them, that we can use our car no bother, people speak English, etc.

I love northumberland, I walked Hadrians wall with dd on my back when she was a baby, one of my favourite holidays.

I suppose you can go abroad cheaper but does it not tend to be unpleasant accomidation and dire food. I would rather stay in this country and stay in good quality accomodation. I am not a beachpackage holiday kind of person so a week self catering here is great for us.

About as 'abroad' as I want to go is Ireland. Maybe Isle of Man, Channel Islands, perhaps.

That's about it.

I don't know really. Have done a lot of places in the UK & once you've been abroad you get the bug for it!

Plus when I was little I went to loads of interesting places abroad & I want my DD to have the same opportunity.

& also in a lot of cases what you can get abroad is cheaper than what you can get here.

we proritise holidays and in the days of me being a SAHM that did mean us borrowing money from dp mum to pay for the holiday although they were never foreign holidays usually a week self catering somewhere (as expat says there is no need to go abroad) and once there we have spent very little, and the money was paid back as quickly as we could.

I do think that holidays are important for a family but they need not be expensive.

Why does it need to be foreign?

This is such a beautiful place, this island.

There's so much to see and do right here.

And so many terrific people.

Just today, we went to Northumberland - DH had never been farther south than Berwick - and had an amazing day out and the people were so lovely, we'll be going back for a caravan long weekend.

I do think it is right to be able to comment on what they have spent the money on especially if the OP believed that it was for essentials.

What's wrong with days out at the park?

That's what we do all the time. Just did it today, in fact.

Going on holiday is a priviledge, but for some people, caravan, camping or self-catering cottage isn't enough.

We didn't go on any sort of holiday after we had children till last year.

Now we spend a week in a self-catering cottage still fairly nearby because it's affordable for us.

I agree, it's not a right.

I consider that I MUST have at least one holiday (preferably abroad) each year - but then I can afford to at the moment & want to make the most of it while I can - you don't know what the future holds.

However I believe that if you can't afford it then you can't really go. I guess it's a case of people's priorities!

I htink they are right although it will be hard for you if they are facing another crisis in the future.

Speedy, how much have you given her (go on I'm being nosey) and why did you give it to her. I would be a bit like your husband and think on yer bike. Sounds to me like you are very good hearted and are finally nearing the end of your tether.

DP's sister hit a financial crisis big time and a lot of it was her own mistake. She had the kids in private school and in a host of after school expensive activities. DP's parents rather than give her some sensible advice like sell the house and downsize, pay off your debts, take the kids out of private school (ok wait until they are due to go to secondary which as luck would have it is around the corner)and live within your means they have instead bailed her out big time paying for everything. Where is the life lesson there?

You do people no favours when you throw money at their problems.

Of course, every one could do with a break but the OP is right, no one is entitled to a holiday. My DH and I would love a break this year - we've been renovating our house, have just sold and are about to start renovating another place. We can choose to either a) go on holiday or b) make a lovely home for ourselves and bump. We chose option b) and accept our lot.