Re ex and DDs periods

Ignore him and take her to the Dr. There are other options than pill and coil, when I was on the jab I had no periods at all.

I went through years of similar to your daughter because of stupid outdated ideas.

I always said if I had a daughter and she had bad periods I'd get her the pill no matter how young.

She has a medical condition, what sort of parent doesn't want their child treated and out of pain?

math

Interfering with medication was the very first thing I had to go to court about with the nightmare ex who I ended up with about 20 prohibited steps orders against

He is also her parent, I think it is something that should be discussed with both parents

She is entitled to privacy about personal matters and assuming she’s competent can consult and not have disclosed to either parent should she wish.

A comment inspired by Calman's post - If the GP suggests a remedy like the pill or transexemic acid and the DD finds that while on an overnight stay her father takes her pills from her or interferes with access to any other remedy the doctor has advised, it would be essential to end overnight stays. It would also be wise to stop overnight stays if her father harangues her about the medical advice she has been given.

If overnight stays are court ordered, you will have to go back to court to argue that the arrangement is not in the DD's best interests due to your ex's attitude toward medical advice. Keep any texts or emails he has sent on the topic, so you will have more than a 'he said/she said' case.

I had similar and tried ibuprofen and tranexamic acid but in the end was on the pill from 13 because the bleeding never settled down- it started and didn't stop for 9 months getting heavier and heavier til I was missing school because I couldn't leave the house and then eventually I was at the point of such major blood loss that I was gonna end up needing transfusions if it wasn't brought under control. The combined pill really changed my life for the better. But obviously it's different for every person, so definitely needs a GP appointment but an attitude that you won't accept being robbed off with nothing!

I got put on the pill as a younger teen for similar reasons, and I wish I hadn't been. Once you're on it, you don't tend to come off it again. Having to take a pill everyday as a forgetful teen... was a constant source of anxiety, I finally came off it in my late 20s and it took ages for my periods to return, I had zero idea what my natural cycle length was and it made conceiving really difficult. I know it seems a long way off but the two things were connected.

But that was 30 years back... I expect options are different... maybe the implant not a pill in a pack to remember (because teenagers have enough to worry about)...

Definitely see what the GP says. As a 40 something, done with conceiving and not on contraception, I'm now learning how to manage my periods. I get the floofy matresses because I still don't like tampons. I know I will feel murderous the week before and I will bloat. But I only started learning after the birth of my children. I hate that I didn't have the agency to decide what chemicals went into me for years. I could have worked through this with the right support when I was younger.

I would suggest discussing this with your dd's gp, they can then refer her to a consultant for investigation.

I would also register her with a Family Planning/WellWoman clinic.
They're a lot more specialised in contraceptive and sexual health for women.

My GP has all my conraception/sexual health history.
However, i choose to get my contraception, smear and other related tests done at my local family planning clinic.
The nurses/staff there are wonderful and the facilities a lot better than at my gp's.
They deal with this stuff all day and have so much more experience and wisdom/insight.

Ps I was the same at her age. Turned out to be endometriosis, but they didn't diagnose until I was 30 odd.

You will need to be like a bull with a horn with the gynaecologists to get answers. They just throw pills and coils about without finding WHY you're bleeding so much. It's always best to find out what's going on before treating it x

Get her to a gynaecologist asap. It's not normal for an adult let alone a child.

Poor thing x

I got put on the pill for very similar at a young age, it really transformed my life for the better, I don't think men realise how debilitating periods can be.

I'd have her checked out first and foremost - that's a heck of a loss of blood every month. She'll be anaemic soon if that carries on. Also - hey, pills can help with anaemia by lessening the flow. But your daughter's wishes need respected. There are very sound medical reasons for wanting to use the pill unconnected with rampant sexcapades. I'd ask if you could go with her to the doc and IF SHE AGREES keep quiet unless asked directly for your opinion, or treat her like someone doing their best to grow up and let her talk it over with either her own doc or the local family planning clinic. But get the iron levels checked. That's excessive blood flow, especially for a youngster.

Take her to the GP and sort it. You DD may be Gillick competent so her dad's objection wouldn't mean shit.

The must awfulmpainful heavy periods. I begged my mum to kill me to make the pain stop. The GP gave me painkillers, since I was throwing up due to the severity of pain they weren’t any use at all. Eventually I told him unless he sorted something out I would kill myself he put me on the pill at 14. Best thing that ever happened to me. I went from bleeding heavily for 10-11 days with agonising pain and vomiting to a 5 day long bleed with a tiny amount of bearable pain. I could also run packets together if I wanted (apparently you don’t need to have the break between packs) so nights out, holidays etc were great as no worries about periods.

I would bring your DD to the doctor, HadloxB, and not the FP centre. She may need testing for anemia, and not every pill is suitable for every individual. There may be medical issues behind the heavy periods that should be investigated.

I still struggle with what needs discussing with him and what doesn’t. Major throwback to his control issues

After you have taken care of your DD, please set up counseling for yourself to work through this.

Forgiveness, I think as a general rule you should only discuss something if you intend to take the other pov into account. Since the other party has consistently demonstrated that he is not capable of a serious contribution, and therefore his views can be discounted on the basis that they are ridiculous, there is no need to discuss. It is a waste of time, and it only feeds his delusion that his half baked views are relevant.

In this case, the exH is a controlling individual and it is clear that his 'contribution' to the discussion is made with control of his ex wife and DD in mind, so yet another reason not to engage here.

I had horrible periods from the age of 11. Ruined matresses. Could never wear white trousers. I had some sucess controling periods with the pill.I've had a coil for the past 10 years. No more heavy periods. Fitting is painful. It's not something I would want my daughter to go though before her first smear test. Your daughter is old enough to make her own decisions. You ex has shown that he should not be consulted. He probably can't handle her growing up.

I agree with all the posters suggesting the GP and it being none of her dads business but just thought that If she's having problems with leaking towels, might something like these over the top be an option www.shethinx.com/

Assuming that the DD stays with her father overnights (the OP hasn’t said) then this is the sort of thing that the person in sole parental charge needs to know. Transexemic acid for example has some fairly rare but extreme side effects. You’d really want the parent in charge to be informed just in case, rather than leaving it up to a child to interpret symptoms, and manage the process of informing A&E.

Take her to see a sympathetic GP. She needs a blood count, iron count and she needs a clotting screen to check she has not got Von Willebrand's disease or similar. Then a suitable discussion on management options, of which there are many.

Why wouldn’t you have made the GP your first port of call??

I went on the pill around that time and for exactly that reason - now 48 and strangely cancer free, and it saved me a lot of pain and embarrassment and regulated my periods beautifully.

If I's been forced to carry on with my periods as they were I'd have been extremely depressed.

He shouldn't get to say what she does with her body, it sends out all the wrong messages.

I think the phrase 'No uterus, no opinion' is applicable here.
Ignore the EX and take her to the GPs, if he protests or gets arsey repeat the above.
Hope she gets it resolved soon.

Take her to see the family doctor. He will be able to prescribe something. Even if it is hormonal contraceptives how will her dad know?

He is also her parent, I think it is something that should be discussed with both parents.

I can't remember what school year that is BUT my friend when we were at school went on the pill in year 6 because her periods were so heavy.

I started my periods at 10 and had lots of similar trouble.

Do ignore the knob and get her to a GP please. I was put on the pill from the age of 13 specifically for this. By a Gynaecologist. Mine turned out to be PCOS.

for your DD.