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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be angry when a staff. bull dog wanders into my garden with my DS playing

62 replies

daisycat01 · 03/04/2007 16:57

I am quite angry, but also shocked at how unconcerned the owner was. We live about 2 fields away from a farm. My boys were playing in our garden, at the end of the garden is a hedge and behind are fields. I had just finished hanging out the washing and was inside when I noticed a white staffordshire dog wandering in the garden. I got my 1.5yr old and 4 yr old inside and shut the back door as the dog started running up to us. I had no idea where it came from or what it would do if I tried to touch it. I am not a doggy person, I dont mind them but dont know how to deal with them. I went to get my neighbour and when we came back it wandered into the field. I went onto the field to see a lady calling it (the dog just ignored her) I went up to her and asked her if it was her dog, yes she said, I said that it was in my garden and she just said "oh she is always wandering off!" I was really annoyed by that, especially given the breed. I said "can you make sure it doesnt again as it was in my garden with my 2 ds who are very small" she said "oh she wont do any harm, she loves children", How am I suppossed to know that. If I see it again I am reporting it to the police!!! Is that unreasonable??

OP posts:
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SofiaAmes · 03/04/2007 22:16

I still think a polite, but firm letter to her would make it very very clear that it is unacceptable to let your dog run wild. (If it was your child, people would think you were a terrible parent.)

tearinghairout · 03/04/2007 22:05

She should have apologised, but didn't see that. Some people are like that. It's perfectly reasonable that people keep their dogs out of other people's gardens. I think you're wise to say 'Once is an accident'. She knows how you feel now; hopefully she'll take note.

tearinghairout · 03/04/2007 22:01

Once a dog ran up to me fast, I didn't know what its intentions were, and I just froze. I went up to the owner and told her I didn't think she should let her dog go hurtling up to people. She was bemused & said 'He won't hurt you' and I said 'But how was I to know that?'

Anyway, I now have a gorgeous, soft, friendly dog, and found myself in the same position. She ran up to a girl a bit fast and scared her; I tried to explain to the girl's father that there was nothing to worry about; he wouldn't listen. HE was in the position that I had been in earler.

My point is that the woman knows the dog, she knows it's friendly and that your DCh are safe with it; BUT she is in the wrong. She is complacent, she has a knowledge that you don't (although of course she can't 100% know it'd be OK with your DCh).

She should be made to realise must keep it off other people's gardens, but I'm not sure the Police is the right way to go.

Original poster
daisycat01 · 03/04/2007 21:59

i will invest in an electric fence and switch it on when it comes back

OP posts:
Spidermama · 03/04/2007 21:54

You need to invest in a high fence. Put some barbed wire over the top. That should stop 'em.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 03/04/2007 21:52

daisy, no, the dog shouldn't have been in your garden and the owner should take greater steps to ensure it doesn't get out again in future. The point I was trying to make was more at people who allow their children to manhandle dogs and are then annoyed if the dog snaps at said child.

Animals can be unpredictable and so can children, and it is therefore generally not adviseable to leave young children alone with dogs, because if the dog were to bit you would have no idea what has happened, but I know people who have been in the same room as their child and the dog, and who have thought it very cute that the child is pulling the dog's ears/lying on top of the dog/pulling the dog's paws etc. IMO if a parent witnesses a child treating a dog, or any other animal for that matter, in that way, the parent is then at fault if the dog bites that child because the parent did nothing to stop the child from mistreating the dog. and yes, pulling a dog's ears/climbing on top of it is mistreatment of a dog.

JustUsTwo · 03/04/2007 21:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
daisycat01 · 03/04/2007 21:44

Justustwo- I can agree with your post if I had been in a park, or walking along the road and a dog came up to us off the lead. But as we were in our own garden, I dont think I am overreacting. I am not going to call the police now, as once is an accident. She should have appolgised and then I wouldnt be angry and feel that she wasnt being responsible for her dog. What if I had a dog in the garden? Would I be responsible if my dog attacked hers?

Spider- Just because dogs dont understand boundaries shouldnt mean that it is accepted that they can wander where they want. Its not like it is a wild animal. Owners should be responsible for their animals. My kid could have thought it was a cuddly dog and squeezed it etc and ended up being bitten. It happens, kids get bitten/killed even when the dog is a family pet. I am just protecting my kids and if the owner wants to protect her dog then she wont let it wander into my garden again.

OP posts:
maxandmonty · 03/04/2007 21:36

Im a dog person but stand by my earlier comments: dogs are the responsibility of the owner and if it cannot be controlled in public, then it shouldn't be out in public. Your kids should be able to play safely in their own garden.

Lizzylou · 03/04/2007 21:34

Sorry to all the dog lovers out there, but if that had happened to me, I would have been livid. Children should have the right to play in their own gardens unhindered by strange dogs.
Cannot understand people who put their dogs over children lives...(oh, they poked it in the eye...oh, it's just in their nature) if it's in their nature then bloody well control it.

JustUsTwo · 03/04/2007 21:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spidermama · 03/04/2007 21:31

Dogs don't have the same grasp of property boundaries as us humans. I haven't read the whole thread but it seems like an over reaction to me, but then I am a dog person.

Original poster
daisycat01 · 03/04/2007 21:28

So wannabe, if my son had pulled the dogs ear in my garden, and the dog had bitten my son, would I have been responsible for stopping that? As the owner had no idea where her dog was, she couldnt control the situation. And I was watching my kids in the kitchen "safely" playing. My toddler could easily have run up to the dog and cuddled it as he has no fear at the moment. It could have resulted in something similar to what another poster described. Luckily DS2 was playing by the door.

OP posts:
Original poster
daisycat01 · 03/04/2007 21:24

hippi- I was actually very wimpy when I saw the lady, I did say to her " I have small children, and I am not used to dogs" but n reflection I wish I had said a bit more. Thats probably why I walked away feeling so angry as I felt she had put my children at a potential risk and didnt see it.
Also with regard to cows escaping from fields etc, yes that happens but it normally is a freak incident. My kids could be playing in the garden and a car could crash into it,it would be an unforseen accident. The owner knows and admited that the dog wanders, So she should keep it under supervision. If a cow escapes, the farmer will make sure the fences are secure. I dont want the £%$!ing dog in my garden!
I agree that if a child teases or taunts a dog it will react, kids and dogs are blamless as they dont know any better, so it falls to the owners of the child and dog to be responsible. In my opinion it is not responsible to let this scenario occur. My garden is my property and if a dog wanders into it again then I will call the local police. I wouldnt have thought that the local police will "laugh" at me, a dog coming into my garden where my young children are playing is dangerous. Being out of control of a dog in a public place is an offence. I dont live in the wilds of the country, my house is on the edge of a large village and it is not acceptable to have dogs wandering the area.

OP posts:
wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 03/04/2007 20:31

dogs should not bite children. but ...

children should not tease dogs.

I am always when people say "oh my dog is so wonderful, the kids pull its ears and ride on its back and pull its fur and it never does anything". IMO this is unacceptable. children should not be pulling dogs' ears or their fur or treating them like playthings. Dogs are animals and should be respected. If a child is hurting a dog and the dog bites then the child is at fault - not the dog. If the child is too young to know better then the parent is at fault for allowing the child to physically hurt the dog.

If a dog bites a child for no reason then the dog should be put to sleep, but if the dog is provoked i.e. child pulling its ears/riding on its back/sticking its fingers in the dog's eyes, it is doing what all animals do and defending itself.

SofiaAmes · 03/04/2007 20:22

sorry, loses

SofiaAmes · 03/04/2007 20:21

Hippi...you appear to be confusing where I feel the blame should lie. I am not putting blame on the dog...the dog did what dogs do...I am putting the blame 100% on the owner for not expecting the dog to do what dogs do. And the unfortunate result is that the two blameless parties bear the brunt of the interaction...the child looses a nose and the dog gets put down. And the owner walks away saying....but what did I do wrong.

SofiaAmes · 03/04/2007 20:17

Dogs are unpredictable. Exactly why they should always be tied up in public and why their human owners should always take responsibility for never having a dog in a position where it can harm a child (or another animal).

talcyegg · 03/04/2007 20:04

Imho all dogs are unpredictable (as are all animals and children!)
and can do a lot of damage.
I don't trust dogs, have also witnessed an attack on small child, also was attacked myself by german shepherd when i was 14.
The dog owner must take the responsibility.

hippipotami · 03/04/2007 19:57

Kitty, I have already explained how - given the dogs uncertain past - how it could have interpreted her fall.
Am not going to go over it again, sorry xx.

Of course no dog has a right to attack a human. But we cannot attribute blame to a dog as it is just a dog in case it was reacting to something it perceived as danger.

And please take those caps off and stop shouting at me.

Anyway, have answered the OP, stated my two pence worth and am going to leave it at that!

KittyLetteMeEatAnEasterEgg · 03/04/2007 19:53

but she didnt tease the dog, she fell over and it bit her nose off

hows that the childs fault?

KittyLetteMeEatAnEasterEgg · 03/04/2007 19:52

ALL DOGS SHOULD BE KEPT ON LEADS IN PUBLIC PLACES - FOR EXERCISE LET THEM OFF THE LEAD IN YOUR GARDEN

GARDEN NOT BIG ENOUGH? THEN YOU SHOULDNT HAVE A DOG

AND I AM A DOG OWNER!

hippipotami · 03/04/2007 19:52

It is a dog, it will do these things. It does not have the ability to think things through, it just reacts.

So, best not tease the dog!

KittyLetteMeEatAnEasterEgg · 03/04/2007 19:50

so if a toddler pulls a dogs ear then the dog has the right to bite its face off??

BULLSHIT!

KathyMCMLXXII · 03/04/2007 19:49

Eh? If a toddler teases a dog it has a right to bite her nose off?

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