to expect a counsellor to stay awake during a consultation!!!???

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Dreadful, really dreadful! I'd have given her a poke to wake her up, rude so n' so!

I had a bit of counselling on the NHS last year and it was contracted out to a private therapy centre - the really lovely woman whom I saw said at our very first meeting that if I didn't think she was right for me I could see another person, no questions asked (I had a very bad experience with a scary counsellor who was a Germaine Greer lookalike (which didn't help) a few years previously and was a bit wary of the whole thing). Obviously I don't know the circs of who/where you saw your person, but it might be worth asking if you can get referred to another counsellor rather than just lose your place altogether.

Hope you manage to get something sorted out, I would definitely complain (I complained about Germaine when, apropos of nothing in the middle of me talking about my OH's cancer, she asked if I'd been breastfed or not - wtf???)

make a complaint

like i said, i seriously doubt that either scenario was the case in a first session....she was probably just a sleep old bint who can't do her job properly!!!

do you know one of my pet gripes is that people are much choosier about hairdressers than counsellors...and if you are going through the nhs you have no choice....

however, there are tons of shit counsellors out there...and not every one is the right 'fit' for a particular client...there should be a 'click' a fit....it should feel that you could have a real relationship with this person...counselling is based on trust...

i wish you so much luck in finding a good one...you deserve one, everyone does.

basically, a feeling of heavy sleepiness is a phenomenon that psychotherapy patients can experience when confronted by material that they are very disturbed and anxious about....falling asleep is a way of shutting down...and as such is a good defence against feelings of terror or high anxiety.

when a counsellor experiences that, it can be as a response to some sense in which what is being talked about is 'dangerous' to the client....it is a difficult thing to explain, but it is as if the counsellor is having the reaction 'for' the client...and it gives the counsellor a big clue that whatever is being talked about, however innocuous it may or may not sound...is a big area of anxiety.

Deep trauma is what i'm thinking of, that hasn't been allowed to come to the surface....

I'm not at all saying that is what happened with you, but I'm explaining that it can and does happen. I've experienced it as a client (a huge and heavy feeling of wanting to fall asleep when I knew that i wasn't tired before the session) and as a therapist (I have had a couple of clients that I realy really struggled to stay awake with at certain points in the session...and it was absolutely not because they were boring me...both had been seriously neglected/abused in very early childhood).

I think even if this woman was being just a common or garden git that shouldn't be in her job....taking it to her as a first step is the right one. But i totally understand if you don't feel comfortable with that.

ahem.

If she was just knackered then she is guilty of being unprofessional and unethical.

However, two other things could have been going on:

It is very useful and can be extremely productive if a counsellor goes into kind of a reverie when with a client....going 'inside' as it were....did you find what she did say useful?

Secondly, there are particular kinds of presenting problems that can create a strong almost irresistable urge to fall asleep in the counsellor...it is a known phenomenon and has been written about in journal papers in the psychotherapy domain.

I think both of these are unlikely in a first session, which should be about putting you at ease and creating a sense of safety, which she patently did not do.

However, I would strongly urge you to go back and confront her....tell her how offended and put off you are by her having appeared to fall asleep...see what she says. the worst that can happen is that she fobs you off and leaves you feeling the same, in which case you should of course complain to the practise manager in the first instance. You might find though, that you are pleasantly surprised by her response to your honesty.

She might be a totally sh*t counsellor....but I only think you'll really know that by her response to you.

Ps, I don't have much info re practicing bodies in the UK as I am training in Ireland but I see glyn did mention it. You owe it to yourself never mind anyone else that as you say "could be more vulnerable but and heres the crunch, an experience like that could have put you off seeking further counselling, I'm so glad it hasn't and once again, I'm so sorry for the dreadful treatment you recieved.

I haven't even read the op and tbh I don't need to, wtf! I'm a trainee psychotherapist and to say falling asleep is unethical or unprofessional is an understatement to say the least, Christ that's like saying a surgeon dozed off while doing triple bypass, grrrrrrrrr, really angry on your behalf, it' plebs like that, that bring the profession into disrepute

By all means if he/she was not able to be "present" not a counselling term just for the sake of it! The least he/she should have done was to terminate the session, will go back now and read from the start but please do not let this go, report it to the appropriate body.

Oh that's awful

Poor you.

Did you get a letter telling you about the appt? I'd start with the address on there. Phone and say you wish to make a complaint, to whom should you address it?

Well out of order

I am involved in this type of work, as a life and parent coach. You should def complain. We all have to work within a code of ethics and that includes being able to take part in the session! In addition, counsellors have what is called supervision- that means they have to have regular sessions with an experienced counsellor who guides and advises them- sounds as if this person needs to adjust their work load and actually acknowledge that they are not up to the job. You could also complain to BACP (Britsh Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy) as all counsellors should be members of that organisation.
Write to t he practice manager and may be your own GP if they are the ones who referred you.

Good luck with your new counsellor.

oh smelly, you could ask if there's a practice manager who could advise you of the proper procedure. If there isn't one there is usually an area practice overseer person.
good luck - it's not acceptable!

that is really awful, I would definately complain and thank goodness you are obviously strong enough to do that.

Dont give up on the counselling there are some really good ones out there

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Completely unacceptable.

Counselling is hard enough without being made to feel that you are boring someone to sleep.

Definitely complain.

I'm appalled.

You should complain. If she's not able to to do her job due to tiredness then she should have called in sick. She's working with vunerable people fhs, many of whom probably have real self esteem issues. She needs to be on the ball not falling asleep

ohsmelly, that is out of order - no question about it. Do complain if you can! She should absolutely reschedule. Totally unprofessional. And she should have been prostrate with apology and checked out the effect it may have had on you.
My sister had the same thing happen to hear but was unable to address it. It left a bad taste in her mouth for certain. Any therapists/counsellors reading this thread - I wonder what the guidance is for this when it happens?

Jeez. I suppose she must have hoped you wouldn't notice or something but that is way out of order. (A tutor of mine at uni once fell asleep while I was reading out my paper to her but in retrospect that seems quite understandable.)