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Original poster

To secretly feel so sad about moving house tomorrow?

31 replies

LaMadeleine · 15/09/2016 06:08

Tomorrow I'll be moving house, from the home I've lived in for the last fourteen years. It was the first house I bought and the only place I've lived since leaving my mum and dad's house. My nearly three year old has lived here all her little life.

To be honest, I've had a fair bit of bad luck in this house and some very lonely points as the majority of my time here was spent living alone. But then of course I have had some lovely times, especially pregnancy, being a new parent to DD etc

The new house is pretty much ready. We've been renovating it for months now so have spent a fair amount of time there already. Thanks to this, DD knows the new place like the back of her hand now and really loves being there. Hopefully the move shouldn't trouble her too much. The house is bigger and I do like it and want to move. We'll be better off money-wise too.

I've been feeling ok about the move up until now, mainly because I've been so busy I think. I woke up this morning feeling really sad and anxious though, in fact I've had a bit of a cry thinking about leaving this place. I'm just trying to get myself together before DD wakes up so she doesn't see me all upset.

I do suffer with anxiety so I guess I'm trying to figure out if it's that or if this is a normal way to feel the day before moving house. I'm sure it must be normal, I guess I'll be fine in a few days, right?

OP posts:
Original poster
LaMadeleine · 15/09/2016 18:09

Thank you very much for your replies. Each one made me feel a bit better about feeling a bit wobbly.

Wannabe - Yes you are so right about the pressure to get things right. I think that might be playing a big part in my apprehension without me realising it.

Andcake - Thanks for posting that. It was good to read about you having such a similar experience and how your son handled things. Here's to six months time!

Ditsy - Yes, exactly that - churned up emotions. Remembering all the lovely mum and newborn times too I guess.

Positivity - Thanks for that. I've been around the house and taken a quick video today so that DD can watch it if she ever feels like it. We will also go around the whole house and say 'goodbye' to stuff tomorrow. It's for her mainly but no doubt it'll do me some good too.

Onemore - Thank you for suggesting I don't try to hide my tears from DD. I was worried it'd unsettle her but I think she'd be unsettled anyway as she's not daft, so I just explained to her. In fact she wiped my eye for me with one of her baby wipes like a little mini mum.

OP posts:
onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad · 15/09/2016 06:41

It's entirely normal - you are going through s major transition and it's entirely natural to grieve for what has gone - doesn't mean you can't be excited and looking forward to the new house too or that the move isn't the right thing.
I wouldn't try and hide you tears from your DD - as long as you aren't utterly distressed and explain why you are crying.
There's nought wrong about feeling sad - it's healthy and shows you're a nuanced human being with feelings. (I still have dreams about the first house I ever lived from when I was born in 1964 til I was 9 in 1973).
Enjoy your new house and good luck with the move.

positivity123 · 15/09/2016 06:33

Totally normal. It's hard to let go. Can you go into each room and thank it for the memories? It helped me when I was trying to declutter. I acknowledged and thanked every item I got rid of. Sounds weird but helps. Good luck with the move

Ditsy4 · 15/09/2016 06:30

Yep, totally normal. I cried nearly every time. It is because you are moving and leaving those memories just as you describe. I really cried last time because we were leaving the house( which I didn't particularity like ) the village and the country. Only Scotland to England but 300 miles.i love this house it is much, much nicer but I had my second and third son at the last house and all the memories of those times as I was mostly very happy there.
It is just all your emotions churned up.

Andcake · 15/09/2016 06:22

Totally normal - I could have written your post in December. Be warned after initial excitement of moves wears off you may get moments of ' home sickness' again totally normal. Have a good cry. My 3 yo still talks about our old place and being positive to him has been important. I love my new home do much space etc if I could transform it out of the suburbs and into where my grotty small central London flat was I would do it in a second. It takes time I was in my old place 16 years. A wise old friend said to me it takes at least 6 months and she's right I'm nearly there.

wannabestressfree · 15/09/2016 06:12

It's a combination and completely normal. You have lived in one place for a long time and think of all the things it signifies to you. There is also the responsibility of getting it right when you have children.... I know I feel like that when we move. Am I doing the right thing?
You have stated all the positives and focus on those when you go today. Just don't worry about saying goodbye and having a few tears. Good luck x