To find getting older so incredibly sad

A fab new job, sounds great.

I think you still need to work on your self esteem; you are still young in terms of how long, as humans, we are living to these days.

I'd still get a check up at the GP and mention those aches and niggles.

"Oh for god's sake, all these people who are not 35 and keep saying 'Oh you're a spring chicken, 35's young, just you wait etc' please go and post on another thread."

"34 soon and man, can I feel it. Niggles, aches, knackered, the whole bit."

No, why should we. I get extremely irritated by comments like this. You are not old. Medical issues aside you should not have the niggles and aches of old age. I'm 57 and don't get these aches you talk about. Perhaps because I'm lucky and maybe because I don't think and behave like an old person. Mind over matter and all that.

Obviously there are exceptions and we all know a brilliant 90 year old who still plays 18 homes of golf and chairs the local debating team... But that isn't the reality most people face.

Here's the problem. You (and much of society) are defining a successful old age by the standards of youth.

I'm quite young and my parents have passed away. My dh behaviour becoame so bad I had to move countries and support my DC. I'm now divorced and I never want to date or be married again.

Sometimes I think like you, op, then I get going again. I took up rock climbing bizarrely ( for me) and have a list of stuff to get done! I've done so much anyway and enjoy boring my DC with it.

My DC and I have many plans to enjoy life and apparently when I'm old, they will come and visit me in my dotage and tell me all their adventures:)

Life is very short, make the most of it. Sensibly ( am accountant :)

There are posters on mumsnet who have lost babies and older children.

I bet they would give the world to see those kids grow older.

Not having a pop op and completely see your post.

Still think it through.

And you are a baby in your 30s

Things are different; some are worse, but many are better.

I'm not sure that between 70 and 80 many things get better. Or between 80 and 90. Health deteriorates. Mental capacity probably deteriorates. Friends die.

Obviously there are exceptions and we all know a brilliant 90 year old who still plays 18 homes of golf and chairs the local debating team... But that isn't the reality most people face.

I really see what you're saying about your parents. I've noticed in the last couple of years there has been a big change and they seem 'old' and it's sad to see and a bit worrying for the future.

The only bad thing about being 44 is that the chance of DC2 coming along seems to be fading fast. Other than that I feel an odd sort of relief to have "banked" some good years IYSWIM?

But then I've wanted to be an old lady since I was small. (OK, that's probably a bit weird).

I guess the meaning of this story is to live fully, and in the moment.

The meaning of the story for me is to avoid taking in all the ageist messages that society sends out and recognizing that growing older does not necessarily mean deterioration. Things are different; some are worse, but many are better.

Also I don't think anyone is living fully in the moment if they are expending psychic energy mourning their lost youth.

The thing is what passions do you have? Whilst babies, studying, marriage and a house are for many a goal they are really a tick list of a pretty regular life.

Have you ever done something that is just for you?
What really bakes your cake?

My sister died right out of the blue a week after her 36th birthday, leaving behind her two lovely DDs aged 8 and 9.

Seeing my nieces grow up without their Mum and watching them reach every milestone without her, soon made me realise that getting old is a privilege we all seem to take for granted.

She would have turned 50 next month and I have no doubt she'd be moaning about getting old herself, just like the rest of us

It kind of bothers me as in I just sometimes think "this is it and it's all going so fast" etc the last 20 years don't feel that far behind so the next 20 I seem to be hurtling towards.

I am an older parent and am sad that my time with my children will be limited by this more than sadness for myself)

I can get quite melancholy...

I'm 48.. my hair is greying, my body is sagging despite exercising a decent amount, and I creak when I get up in the mornings.

BUT... I love my middle aged-ness! Two of my class mates from school are now dead.. I'm lucky..I'm well, have a fabulous family, a good marriage... and frankly with each passing year I care less about what people think of me, I'm less anxious or bothered!

I think the thirties ARE hard.. that realisation that you are no longer 'young' . But I am looking forward to my 50s. I took up Taekwondo at 46, I'll be the oldest blackbelt in my club (soon I hope)... I've just started climbing and I plan to learn a musical instrument next. My kids are growing up and becoming independent. What's not to like?!

OP, you're 35! You hopefully have many years ahead.

You need to make some plans. Short term, long term, with yourself and your family.

I feel this way sometimes but then I remind myself that some people don't make it to old age and that gives me perspective.

I've always been bolshy springs, maybe that helps.

#fuckthatshit

I do understand exactly what you mean OP, but I didn't start to feel it until I was about 55 (64 next month)

If I could be stuck at an age it would be yours!

Yes, getting old is preferable to the alternative, but it's still a bit of a shock noticing aches and pains and wrinkles and grey bits.

What I like about being 51 is that since I turned 50 I've become much more bolshy and I've designated 2016 as my year of Fuck That Shit.

I am nearly 20 years older than you. I don't like the physical aspects of getting older, especially the peri menopause. But the hardest part is having friends die. I have lost two friends who were about my age, both of cancer. That was a shock.

You know, there's nothing wrong with taking stock now and then and realising how precious life is - and how fast it goes. It gives pause for thought and can be useful in terms of appreciating the moment and not taking it for granted that people we love will be around forever.

Nothing wrong with being nostalgic. Just cry happy tears, not sad ones. Listen to the song, Do You Realise?by The Flaming Lips. It says it all

Worrying about it won't change a thing, it will just spoil the present.

Don't feel sad about growing old. It's a privilege denied to many.

You are a long time dead, just enjoy the life experiences!

Once I am dead, I am dead!!!