To not be surprised that divorce rates are so high when I see how some friends treat their husbands??

Of course
Really not

So your position is; there are lots of divorces and most of them are because women aren't nice/intimate enough to their husbands?

Can I just clarify that is your theory?

You are obviously right, but what is the point of your post? If course it's better to work as a team. Really bit sure what you want people to say.

It does rather look like you're having a smug and/or goady "Oh my relationship is so much better than other people's, it couldn't possibly fail because I'm so wonderful and my husband agrees" sort of vibe here today.

Which is rather dismissive of all the many and complicated reasons why marriages fail, down to faults on both sides in the majority of cases, and with the 'fault' spread between both men and women being unreasonable where it's more one-sided.

If your friends are having 'petty' arguments they are probably frazzled, and need support rather than judging.

PisForPeter affairs happen because people can't keep it in their bloody pants.

If you're unhappy to the point where you start wanting to sleep with other people then just do everyone a favour and leave. There is absolutely no justification for cheating.

""Starter marriage is just an entry-level relationship". Oh don't be so ridiculous, IrianofWay.

You can get into an 'entry-level relationship' (what sort of ridiculous stuff are you reading?) without having to get married.

How long have you been married op? And how many dc do you have?

No offense meant, but you strike me as rather green!

"Starter marriage is just an entry-level relationship". Oh don't be so ridiculous, IrianofWay.

You can get into an 'entry-level relationship' (what sort of ridiculous stuff are you reading?) without having to get married.

Sorry, what I meant to say was constant petty arguments are as a result of deeper problems. Little arguments from time to time are completely normal- everyone has their off days and we take it out on the other person by snapping and getting a bit more annoyed when someone does something irritating. It doesn't make you any less of a team. As long as you apologise when you get it wrong, and don't launch into nasty PAs.

I just find a team approach works better for me??

Bully for you. It works well for me too. Shame it didn't for my stbx. Actually what seemed to work for him was to do fuck all except shout and swear and be abusive to both myself and the dcs, while leaving all the stress and responsibility to me. Not sure that really comes under "team approach." I decided to ditch the "team approach" when he started being physically abusive to our dcs and now he is "stbx." I guess that officially moves him to "team twat."

I read this article in the telegraph last year

Link

Top 10

Affair (33 per cent)
Selfishness (22 per cent)
Personality traits (14 per cent)
Abusive behaviour (14 per cent)
Different expectations from life (13 per cent)
We’re not compatible (13 per cent)
Job loss or debt (12 per cent)
Interfering in-laws (11 per cent)
Got married too young (9 per cent)
Political beliefs (8 per cent)

Treating spouses/partners very badly is not confined to women. In my purely anecdotal observations I have seen as much exploitative behaviour by women as by men... Exploitation and general failure to consider the other partner has any needs (or even a personality) are frequent grounds for relationship breakdown...

Well yes I agree some people seem to fall to easily (I'm not talking about relationships where there is an outright abusive partner)

I have been to hell and back with my marriage including all the way to the divorce courts. At the same time our friends were seperated also and at 'war' she always maintained she never did anything wrong (red flag right there) Over time reduced contact with this women - she was v picky, selfish and a game player. I can now see how her poor husband was drained of any joy over her anal ways and toxic attitude.

I recall her staying at my house telling me Cillit bang worked well around taps. Asked me what marks were on the walls - it's water marks on paint next to handtowel, just splash marks. Turning up with 20 minutes notice and expecting the red carpet welcome.

The ultimate came when she told me we could not be friends if I got back together with my estranged husband.

god I wish I was the one being kicked out into a bed of my own for 8 hrs kip every night and win put upon parent of the year whle I'm at it

www.telegraph.co.uk/men/relationships/10357829/Why-do-women-initiate-divorce-more-than-men.html

I haven't checked their stastics.

My dh slept in the spare room when I had a bad back recently, as it meant I could have the light on if I couldn't sleep. He also brought me all my meals, did the housework and looked after dd until I was better. I really appreciated this help and I think it strengthened our marriage.

muminscotland

Starter marriage is just an entry-level relationship

The difference between a male and a man is huge. Jealous over a baby and the fact that family dynamics have changed is pitiful.
Surely a candidate for having an EA, at the very least.

Perhaps they're just upset that their husbands bought them engagement rings 'on the smallish side' and aren't being as generous as your 'hubby' in offering to replace them?

I'm sure I've heard that more women decide to end marrages than men.

"If men did what they were told, when they were told, women wouldn't have to argue then divorce them."

I know, it's so obvious really.