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Original poster

To not be surprised that divorce rates are so high when I see how some friends treat their husbands??

163 replies

PisforPeter · 11/07/2014 16:09

Just having huge arguments over petty issues, being anal about the childrens routines, making DH sleep in spare room for duration of oregnancy & first 8 months of baby's life too.
Do folk need to chill out a bit or am I being too harsh??
I just find a team approach works better for me??

OP posts:
OfaFrenchMind · 11/07/2014 17:12

Aaaaannnnnnnddddddd...... you missed the point.

Thumbwitch · 11/07/2014 17:12

Irian - if it's any consolation, I knew it was a joke. :)

7Days · 11/07/2014 17:12

why why why

because who wants to be up with a screeching child all night?

who who who

if thats the way your child is, i think youll find the parent who gets landed with night wakenings is the one who is anal about bedtimes, and co sleeping and all those other heinous crimes.

how odd that it turns out its women ruining marriages because the selfish bitches need to sleep at night

honestly

CaptChaos · 11/07/2014 17:10

I completely agree.

Women shouldn't have opinions.

Or think.

Or want what's best for their children.

Unless they dovetail with their DHs wishes.

It really IS all about the menz.

Ledkr · 11/07/2014 17:09

Yes I agree op.naughty wives having opinions or wanting an easier life bed to themselves no wonder so many menz leave those silly ladies!!

Weathergames · 11/07/2014 17:06

Yes because personally I loved every minute of my messy divorce Hmm

arethereanyleftatall · 11/07/2014 17:04

Farleys - that was an example but I know exactly the kind of person the op is referring to by this - those where you can be having fun somewhere, but all is ruined cos pfb must be home in their own room by 7pm ...why, why, why???

settingsitting · 11/07/2014 17:03

DH sleep in spare room for duration of oregnancy & first 8 months of baby's life too.

I think that that is a recipe for disaster.
I think if that habit is started, it makes for all sorts of problems.

ThatBloodyWoman · 11/07/2014 17:03

I tend to treat as well as I'm treated, tbh.

Makes a good partnership.

Lottapianos · 11/07/2014 17:02

Steak and blow job day? Don't give people ideas! New Tory policy? Sounds just like Boris Johnson's sort of thing (vomits)

Seriously though, some people can be assholes. That's people - can be male or female. I do think quite a few people go into marriage with ridiculously unrealistic expectations, thinking life will be a beautiful fairytale and their partner will be able to read their mind and all will be well. And this is not helped one bit by the wedding industry.

And don't get me started on people who become parents without a single tiny clue which end of a baby is which or how to even be around a child and expect it all to work out like a Disney film...

Original poster
PisforPeter · 11/07/2014 17:02

only
I've always had a good but flexible routine with my 3 DC as best I can.

OP posts:
Original poster
PisforPeter · 11/07/2014 17:00

It's not dilley about routines, I think you are reading too much into that aspect.

OP posts:
IrianofWay · 11/07/2014 17:00

It was meant to be a joke. Still Confused

JohnFarleysRuskin · 11/07/2014 16:59

What proportion?

Genuinely, what proportion of divorces do you think come about because men find their wives are anal about their kids bedtimes? I'm so intrigued.

ICanSeeTheSun · 11/07/2014 16:58

What goes on in my family mostly works, I would not expect it to work in other families.

DS has a strict routine, try's our best not to break it. Break the routine and we break the calm.

FruVikingessOla · 11/07/2014 16:57

IrianofWay. Because you can meet a guy, move in together, have a 'living together' relationship before you take the big step of getting married and making a commitment to each other for the rest of your lives.

Many relationships fail, sadly, but at least if they break up pre-marriage (and let's assume no DC at the time), then, well, that's life.

To assume that a 'starter marriage' is an 'entry-level relationship' which is just a rehearsal for a serious, long-term marriage is slightly odd.

OfaFrenchMind · 11/07/2014 16:55

"steak and blow job day" :)
I would vote for this, but only if their is a "Humongous amount of cake and cunni day" 2 weeks before. Make them work for it!

Original poster
PisforPeter · 11/07/2014 16:55

Nice to meet you too AmandaClarke Grin

OP posts:
TheRealAmandaClarke · 11/07/2014 16:53

YANBU
Really these women should be paying more attention to their relationships so that their men don't feel so pushed it and imasculated
Hopefully national campaigns such as "steak and blow job day" can help to redress the balance.
Fo

Original poster
PisforPeter · 11/07/2014 16:53

Exactly French Mind, you put it much better than me!!
Thanks

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 11/07/2014 16:52

Piss for Peter? No, thanks!

Rafanderpants · 11/07/2014 16:51

I agree OP, same with men too though they way I hear some talk to their partners, works both ways.

But yes, mainly my female friends.

OfaFrenchMind · 11/07/2014 16:50

I agree, to a certain point (only to a point, mind). I think that we should also be able to discuss something like that without getting defensive and saying that "we are back in the 50's".
Of course a slacking, abusive or controlling husband is not acceptable.
He has a baby, or a child, his family should become his priority, and taking care and supporting of his wife is paramount.
But a wife that consider that slagging off her husband when he is not perfect is not ok.
Neither is sending him to the sofa or another room to make place for the baby, if he does not offer it.
Also, if we want him to be considered an actual parent, other than just a bread-winner, letting your DH take actual parenting decisions should be important (positive motivation to stay actively involved!), even if you are not crazy about them!
So YANBU (but this should not turn into automatic wife-blaming)

arethereanyleftatall · 11/07/2014 16:49

Two things I do think are absolute nonsense, which I have only ever seen on mn and never in real life...

  1. Husband out at work and commute for 12 hours, poster at home with one nt baby, an expects husband to pitch in with house work...
  2. Husband 'not allowed' to do anything they like doing...
Here comes the divorce...
Original poster
PisforPeter · 11/07/2014 16:48

No Farleys
But perhaps a proportion

OP posts:
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