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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think all men are basically pervs?

390 replies

mrsluvvaluvva · 01/03/2012 13:49

Hi there

Felt compelled to ask this as just lately I have really been seeing men in a different light when in social settings. Perhaps I am just getting old and grumpy or reading something that isn't there.

I have been to a few parties recently and have been really conscious of men eyeing up very young almost tartily dressed teenagers. These girls were dressed very glamorously but waay too old for their age. I saw a couple of girls probably aged 16/17 and a couple over 18's, but not by much.

What I found worrying was middle aged men blatently eyeing them up and more worrying men in my group of friends/family. Men old enough to be their dad's. Not necessarily gawping but craftily staring when they could. Now I'm talking not just about a pretty girl but proper tarted up, hot pants the lot.

It made me feel quite sick to see middle aged men perving like this, so am I being unreasonable here to think even nice guys are secret pervs and although they may not be happy with their daughters dressed up like that, they will happily ogle others?

OP posts:
Pagwatch · 01/03/2012 14:11

You are well informed about what she was wearing. Were you perving looking very closely.

Yabu. So much so I am going to put this in my big book of desperate stereotyping.

EdithWeston · 01/03/2012 14:09

"even nice guys are secret pervs and although they may not be happy with their daughters dressed up like that, they will happily ogle others?"

Ever wondered why they aren't happy with their DDs dressed like that? Yes, of course it's normal to look (and as pointed out above, it's not unique to men). Some manage to do it discreetly, lots don't; and IME it's less hidden from those who are no longer in the target group IYSWIM, so it may become more spottable as you age.

YankNCock · 01/03/2012 14:08

My DH (who is 35 so not exactly middle aged yet) would be looking and thinking 'what on earth is she wearing? That looks awful. Her parents shouldn't have let her out dressed like that'.

YonWhaleFish · 01/03/2012 14:08

Unless they are drooling/rubbing their thighs while gurning/touching

Brilliant! Grin

YABU, they're not all pervs.

mrsluvvaluvva · 01/03/2012 14:08

Oh lol at playboy mansion.

One party had a girl dressed in miniscule hotpants(no one else even dressed in anything close to this )the other was a wedding. Girl in normal dress but very very tarted up-ie TOWIE style

OP posts:
Alibabaandthe40nappies · 01/03/2012 14:08

I think we have a bored journo or two on MN today, weird threads left, right and centre.

fabwoman · 01/03/2012 14:07

YABU and a bit of anm idiot tbh.

MoreBeta · 01/03/2012 14:06

Maybe these middle aged men were looking at these girls and thinking 'I wouldn't let my daughter go out dressed like that!

Of course, they wouldn't ever say it out loud because women should be able to wear what they like these days. Hmm

ChickensHaveNoLips · 01/03/2012 14:04

YABU. All people with eyes like looking at other pretty young people. Entire industries are made out of this phenomenon (advertising, music, film etc). Unless they are drooling/rubbing their thighs while gurning/touching, then I think it's just, you know, looking.

DinahMoHum · 01/03/2012 14:04

yeah i think a fair few men would "admire" women dressed up like that. Doesnt mean theyd do anything about it, in the same way that i have to keep telling myself off for noticing the hot young students outside the college. Pretty boys, but no way would i actually go near them.

mrsluvvaluvva · 01/03/2012 14:03

I totally DO ogle younger men! Not 17 or 18 year olds though. And its one thing to notice an attractive person and maybe even comment, but to stare?

If I saw a young attractive man I may look but I would doubt I'd then give it a second thought. These men were focused on one specific provacatively dressed. Girl.

OP posts:
ripsishere · 01/03/2012 14:02
ComposHat · 01/03/2012 14:01

Now I'm talking not just about a pretty girl but proper tarted up, hot pants the lot.

Blimey, are you going to parties at the Playboy Mansion or something?

MoreBeta · 01/03/2012 13:52

Older women never look at younger men of course.

For example, I have never seen threads on MN where middle aged housewives drool over young male actors. Not once. Never.

ripsishere · 01/03/2012 13:52

I think you are TBH. My DH is 50 something, he certainly doesn't ogle young women.

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