To not want all our weekends eaten up by ds's football playing?

FFS Dolly Don't feel guilty we are all different, you have to do what suits you.

I have friends who do all this ferrying their kids about, evenings and weekends and they work full time. If I did that I would collapse.

They're not wrong and nor am I. We all have to be honest with ourselves about what we can cope with, there's no shame in it.

Dolly! Dovt be so lazy !

I have 2 dc as well
Ok I'll think about it and find out some details
If it starts any earlier than 10 it's a no though

You can lift share!

You'll need to check. We can't drop and collect at rugby.

Dolly you can just drop them at footy and pick up at the end

Dolly I'm a single parent working full time. Ds does a whole host of activities at the weekends - swimming, horse riding, golf, rugby, cricket, performing arts class, church choir. Not all every weekend though. This weekend he went to a friend's birthday party, performing arts class, cricket, rugby and golf. Pretty usual spread. He usually has half of each weekend day without activities so he can do what he likes at home and I can do the washing/ironing/gardening etc and/or we may go out for a bike ride or cinema/national trust.

Out of interest
How many working single parents are on this thread who do the football thing at weekends? You've all made me feel incredibly guilty about not taking ds1 I'm just not sure I can physically cope with never having a morning off

Going back to the OP, yes it is unreasonable to let DS's football, at the age of 7, take over the family's weekend. Your SIL just has to realise that the fact that her DS does football doesn't mean that it takes up the whole weekend, unless she's not telling us that he's been talent spotted and will be turning out for Man Utd in three years' time.

aha but MI my kids friends play sport as well. they ADORE it they cannto wait to get on it.
When i had kids i realised this would be involved, not to would be ridiculous. I dont MAKE them do any of it, they want to and enjoy it.

I think this is an interesting dilemma which arises out of having more than one child and especially children of different sexes. If the OP's SIL just had a boy (or even more than one boy assuming they both liked football) I'm guessing this wouldn't be such a problem. It's the having to take two sisters along and then finding time to timetable activities for them which is more tricky. I have to say that as a mother of a girl and a boy whose dh is often not around at weekends ands evenings to share the ferrying I have encouraged my dcs to take up hobbies they can do together and at the same time (they are two years apart) - in their case ice skating, tennis, swimming and piano. DS does play football on a Sunday morning, but on a drop-in basis so it's not a disaster if we don't make it. I also think there is a balance to be struck between having every spare minute packed with activities and having time to hang out and play - both are important.

motherinferior - don't worry they manage all that on top of football.

I don't get the problem. There is enough time in a weekend to play sport, mooch around, visit castles, shop and eat together. We do swimming on Saturday morning, dd takes herself to orchestra,usually mooch in afternoon, and go for walks in country on Sunday.

There is no 'right' way to live, and I do not subscribe to 'life is a competition'. Different families enjoy different things.

Er...friends? Hanging About With One's Mates? Going to the library? Being a Vague Pain Around The House Before Making One's Own Entertainment?

(and Beer, of course...)

Well, it had to be football for us, as we've done all the local castles and NT properties. There was nothing else to do with the weekends.

Your SIL has to do what works best for her family (all of them) we all have different lifestyles and as such what works for one won't work for another.

For example, my OH works Mon-Fri 9-5 where as I work shifts (no set pattern) so we don't necessarily have weekends together (for example I worked Sat night so spent half of Sunday sleeping and am off today), and my eldest now works at weekends. Our children are 18,15 and 7 but we have always tried to accommodate their needs within reason. For example my eldest had swimming lessons and can swim very well, when she was aged 7 she wanted to start gymnastics so she had to chose just one activity (she chose gymnastics) which meant 2 evenings a week and Sunday mornings plus competitions (all over the place)

Son also had swimming til he was 7 and then chose football, one weekday evening training session and matches on Sundays. For him football has been excellent - a source of exercise away from his X box, but more importantly he has learned about teamwork and discipline. He used to misbehave (nothing serious, talking messing about) and was quite short tempered. He learnt that if he messed about in football he was dropped from the team and that losing his temper got him nowhere.

Youngest still has the joys of swimming lessons at 9.00 Saturday morning! She has not shown an interest in anything else yet. My children have realised that whilst they can do activities that they choose it is about family as well ie they have to accommodate the needs of others. Also by having to choose the activity made them weigh up whether or not it was what they really wanted to do.

Yes sometimes if I am working DD has to go along to the football matches but she accepts that and knows her dad will spend time with her later at the park or local castle

exoticfruits - ahh hadn't seen that thread. I spent most of my junior and teen years in a caravan at the weekends. Was fab!

Probably why as soon as we had enough cash DH and I bought our own static. DSD and DD certainly havent had as much freedom as I did (kicked out the door in the morning and only coming back for tea!) but they both seem to enjoy it. DSD in particular acts quite jealous of DD if we talk about going down there now.

If your DN wants to do football, he really needs to start now. As some other posters have said, people start playing in teams now and stay with them until their teens. My younger DS tried to start playing at 8 and that was really already too late as he didn't have the skills that he needed. My older DS started at the same age, but had already practised his skills beforehand.

Well, I meant generally, really, not just yours but I suppose I did see yours and assumed it was the afternoon (which I think Em probably did too).

But really, I'm not prepared to spend all weekend ferrying my children around. They seem quite nice and non-psychotic children, really they do.

I always think that my DS needs to be exercised, a bit like a dog, so am pleased he likes sport.

I've always seen mine the same way. Simple needs -plenty of physical exercise and we are all happy!

There was a thread no so long ago where parents were called cruel for taking their DCs to the coast everyweekend! Posters recounted at great length how they hated being dragged away! We are all different-I would have been quite happy to have been taken.
It is all a question of responding to the DC you get-not your idea of what you wanted! (if I could have put in an order I would have said not a footballer please! However I got the footballers and went with it)

Oh, and actually I too would be deeply fed up if my partner was out doing something every Sunday afternoon. Not occasional Sundays, but regular Sundays. Not least because I do more hands-on parenting in the week. I have no problem with him going off to do t'ai chi on a Wednesday evening and occasional Sundays; he has no problem with me singing on a Thursday evening and occasional Saturdays. But otherwise one or the other of us would be landed with sole childcare and much as I love my children I would find this very stressful.