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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

for feeling smug when mothers of school-agers describe themselves as "Full-time mums" or "Housewives"?

794 replies

CareeringAlong · 29/11/2010 16:22

Name change...

Following from the threads about life at home when you don't do voluntary of paid work, although your children are of school-age, I was wondering if anyone else who does work can't help feeling a tad superior? Oh yes, I know I'll be flamed for this, but there it is.

These housewives seem to do all the things that working mothers do (cooking, cleaning, planning etc, etc, etc) but don't have any purpose outside of this. They seem to think that doing the supermarket shopping is a reasonable replacement for a 'real' career. I can't help but feel prejudiced against them.

I'm currently a SAHM as DD is pre-school, but will do paid (and voluntary) work as soon as she's in school. I'm looking forward to building-up my career again and working for the family.

Oh, and before anyone jumps on this, I've always cooked decent-quality meals from scratch, even when I worked v. long hours; my dogs are walked in the early hours; and my house is always clean and tidy. I argue that ironing is for losers, however!

OK. Hard hat on!

OP posts:
Maisiethemorningsidecat · 30/11/2010 22:36

To give their children the best start?

Fuck RIGHT off. You don't hold the monopoly you know.

SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:35

PMSL SM

I have known you years deary, I never assumed you were out to annoy me, I just thought you were implying my degree was summat silly to do with

Becuase if you didn't realise the dissertation title I mentioned sounded like it after all! The other possibilities sound less guffy but have less RL usefulness.

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:23

are you on the make.dont be so daft

bickie · 30/11/2010 22:23

SkyBluePearl. I don't think I know any mums SAHM or WOHM who are not trying to give their children the best start. Sorry -you can't claim that one for the SAHMs. Hobbies and interests fine - you can have them.

YuleBeLucky · 30/11/2010 22:23

scottishmummy, are you on the sherry?

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:19

why would i only seek to annoy you,when so many on mn to poke

SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:18

Bollocks, i've done my Mn apprenticechip my neck is firmly stuck out

But OK sorry Wink

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:17

wind your neck in,no i wasnt addressing you

SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:16

SM was that at me?

It's an MA in Autism. It's important and can make a difference. But then as you've felt free to hurl insults at me I can tell you to piss off back can't I?

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:15

lol,best start in life!best start is v subjective and isnt necessarily mammie at home either

SkyBluePearl · 30/11/2010 22:12

dont think i actually know any full time stay at home mums with children at school and no outside interests.

most mums i know work part time or stay at home with toddlers - they have lots of interests/hobbies/activites but also want to give their children the best start in life by being there for them.

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:03

nah nae trip trip ignore the troll hunters.they are daft

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 30/11/2010 22:01

Goats are more kind of Maaaaaaaah (fondly remembers the grandson of a goat farmer and nights in the goatshed). Trip trap on MN though.

CommanderDrool · 30/11/2010 21:58
scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 21:49

baaaaa=sheep
goat is trip trap surely

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 30/11/2010 21:48

Baaaaaah

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 21:47

dont act the goat maisie,mn is traipsing life & pov to online strangers,and they opine

thats why we all love it so

bickie · 30/11/2010 21:46

I agree with Pastaplease. OP is just voicing her opinion. Now granted OP was being deliberately provocative - but as she has admitted herself - to get this kind of reaction. I don't know why some would wonder at her having friends - she seems pretty interesting to me. Now someone please say 'Why did she have children - if she just plans to leave them with a stranger' and put this thread to bed. Or better still my MN favourite: 'research' shows if you leave your baby for more than 8 hours (note the convenient correlation with working hours) they will think you are dead. How researchers worked this out with a non-talking baby - I have never found out.

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 30/11/2010 21:38

So - everyone is very happy being a SAHM. In which case, why on earth do you feel to justify your choice (over 700 posts now) to a complete stranger whose opinion you don't value? Hmm

MN is like some weird parallel universe at times..

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 21:35

be sure to cite shitsville uni and biddulph in your socialsciencetastic essay

pastaplease · 30/11/2010 21:33
Grin
webwiz · 30/11/2010 21:30

Well ok "discourse in an online parenting forum" I won't be using 'the other forum' as a source Grin

Lougle · 30/11/2010 21:29

I stay at home. By rofession I am a Registered Nurse, but my registration is likely to lapse in 2012.

I have 3 children under 5 (just, DD1 is 5 on Friday) and DD1 has SN. She attends Special School full-time. DD2 goes to preschool 15 hours per week, and DD3 is home full-time.

I am far from at a loose end. I care for DD1 who needs constant supervision whenever she is at home. I couldn't possibly leave her with a Childminder, they wouldn't have her.

I care for DD3 all day, and DD2 each afternoon.

I am on the preschool committee, will be chair in January.

I also volunteer on a Partnership Board for a Childrens' Centre, so go to meetings for that, attend training, etc.

I am very busy. I may not be paid for the work I do, but I don't spend the days twiddling my thumbs.

The way I see it, I am making the best of the situation I am in. DD1 will need 24/7 care for the forseeable, so I do what I can to contribute while she is at school.

pastaplease · 30/11/2010 21:23

"Online Parenting Fora", surely?

Hmmm, better get myself to Pendants' Corner! :)

YuleBeLucky · 30/11/2010 21:19