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AIBU?

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Original poster

for feeling smug when mothers of school-agers describe themselves as "Full-time mums" or "Housewives"?

794 replies

CareeringAlong · 29/11/2010 16:22

Name change...

Following from the threads about life at home when you don't do voluntary of paid work, although your children are of school-age, I was wondering if anyone else who does work can't help feeling a tad superior? Oh yes, I know I'll be flamed for this, but there it is.

These housewives seem to do all the things that working mothers do (cooking, cleaning, planning etc, etc, etc) but don't have any purpose outside of this. They seem to think that doing the supermarket shopping is a reasonable replacement for a 'real' career. I can't help but feel prejudiced against them.

I'm currently a SAHM as DD is pre-school, but will do paid (and voluntary) work as soon as she's in school. I'm looking forward to building-up my career again and working for the family.

Oh, and before anyone jumps on this, I've always cooked decent-quality meals from scratch, even when I worked v. long hours; my dogs are walked in the early hours; and my house is always clean and tidy. I argue that ironing is for losers, however!

OK. Hard hat on!

OP posts:
ShanahansRevenge · 01/12/2010 01:15

Ah bolix...she's miserable and this kind of thread makes her feel important.

yangymac · 01/12/2010 00:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

pastaplease · 01/12/2010 00:47

This isn't a 'strangers bringing up your children' thread though, as CareerAlong was only talking about the time that the children are in school.

yangymac · 01/12/2010 00:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

DioneTheDiabolist · 30/11/2010 23:56

I haven't read the whole thread because I can't be bothered. I am a SAHM, when I become a WOTH mum I am at least getting a cleaner, but hopefully a male au-pair who drives and can use a drill.

iwastooearlytobeayummymummy · 30/11/2010 23:52

scottishmummy,

why do these debates always make you rise to the bait?

If you feel secure in your choice, why not
'jog on' and ignore?

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 23:43

noo,lifeblood of mn is nursery/sahm/working.fuck without it yiu would have to scrabble aboot with the bores from style section.tittering about ysl and touch eclat dis and dat

yangymac · 30/11/2010 23:41

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Message withdrawn

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 23:19

oh i bet not,fluff and fold isnt really up there is it.

MummyMyfanwy · 30/11/2010 23:18

Oh how superior you are!! Wow - we are all in awe of your wondrous self! You dont come across as concieted or stuck up at all.

So come on tell us then all about your very important positon in which you are employed? Tell us how fullfilled it makes you feel. I expect its a much more superior position to most other working mums too?? It must be for such a superior and super inmportant bod like you!

Why bother yourself with the niff naff of raising your children full time when there are other so much more impottant things in the world than your kids! Do you just squeeze them in like the ironing (oh forgot you dont such menial work do you? That is for the losers of this world) when you have a spare 5 minutes from stroking your own ego?

I expect there are plenty of Full Time SAHM that have alot more going for them than your shallow narrow minded self!

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 30/11/2010 23:11

CareeringAlong - if you had started by saying that you were glad to be a WOHM, because you don't think you'd enjoy being a SAHM, that would have been very different.

But you asked if you were being unreasonable to feel smug about the fact that you work whilst the mothers of some school-age children don't - and that was deliberately nasty and provocative.

I am glad you are happy with your decision - but I don't think this gives you any right to look down on people who have made a different decision, and to denigrate that choice by making sweeping generalisations about cleaning, ironing and shopping.

niceday · 30/11/2010 23:09

School gates of course!

niceday · 30/11/2010 23:08

Op - did anyone try to change your mind??? On what exactly? Well, you feel smug on "ft mum" or "housewife" expressions. Can you suggest better ones? Maybe "free to do whatever I want woman" or "not a slave and have imagination to fill my time" sound better?

The trouble is, they are too long and not everyone at schoolmates will get them

SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:59

Oops typing even worse than usual sorry- waking toddler on lap.

SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:58

WEll CA I know of Kant and indeed it's onscenr but at least it's not Nietzsche. That would be too damned much.

webwiz · 30/11/2010 22:54

Damn you SantasMooningArse and CareeringAlong I thought I'd ended the thread. I think your post was more interesting though Santas.

Original poster
CareeringAlong · 30/11/2010 22:53

Could I throw Kant into the mix at this stage, or would I be accused of obscene language?

OP posts:
Original poster
CareeringAlong · 30/11/2010 22:51

I'm here. Hi!

I don't really have anything else to add.

Nobody's changed my mind. I'm glad to not be the woman with school children or older who says that she's a "Stay at home mum" or "Home maker", when the subject of jobs (voluntary or otherwise) arises at parties.

OP posts:
SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:50

I can do you the a comparison of the development of buddhist religion between theist and atheist variants? An analysis of ASD services with suggestions for narrowing geeographical variations in service provision?

No?

Ah but at least i've cured all your insomnia Wink

webwiz · 30/11/2010 22:45

Of course I mean Foucault - too much wine.

webwiz · 30/11/2010 22:44

I don't really find Focault to my taste, Wittgenstein is more my thing.

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:40

inserting objects in anuses.you been snorting lemsip yule

scottishmummy · 30/11/2010 22:39

well ye ken then that of course im takin piss out if socialsciencetastic chuff.throw in some social constructs and foucault,really make me laugh

SantasMooningArse · 30/11/2010 22:38

And back to the OP- yes most mums want the best for their kids.

And an awful lot of mums are sometimes SAHM, sometimes WOHM, or WAHM........ their personalities, child rearing skills and validity don't change, only their circumstances. And perhaps where they find their validation: I got an awful lot from my work when I had it, now it comes from accessing the best ASD support I can for my boys and helping the family through a rough patch.

Both are fine, just different.

YuleBeLucky · 30/11/2010 22:38

I really am going to shove my gavel up a few arses in a minute.

Where's the OP? Catching up on a few of Jezza K repeats on late night telly, I reckon.