What to do - 70yo dad irresponsible with money

But would he recoup the investment in his lifetime? If he's not running electric heating, cooking and laundry for a family or heating his home with electricity, perhaps not. Not everyone's property is suitable either.

Nah - tell him to get an equity release scheme where he can draw down on in dribscand drabs - ( there are lots) up to a predetermined limit - as he’s not old it will be about 35% of value of his house. Should easily give him a few hundred a month extra if he can reign himself in and take on regular amounts- if he can’t then it’s not your problem

I’d help him with budgeting but not with money. If he’s a spender he’ll find a way to spend that extra £1-200 and need more.

He could live for 20 years, before inflation that could easily be the thick end of £50k…

If you advised him not to get solar panels then I'm not surprised he doesnt listen to your advice. You could have checked he was getting a battery with them.

If you sit down with him and go through his expenses then maybe you will understand why he is struggling and maybe he'll think twice about things like a gym sub.

No point in giving money to someone who is bad at managing it unless you have to or they will be homeless.

I would help him with budgeting/ budgeting app.

I would have thought solar panels are a good idea, if they are lowing his electric bills / heating.

I definitely wouldn't help with money. Advice, etc. fine. If you want to get him a top up shop occasionally or whatever, go for it.

He could live another 10, 20 years. £200 a month would add up to nearly £50k of him throwing away on crap that you could spend on your own house/kids/retirement.

Don't waste your time or money. He'll take your money and ignore any good advice because he probably thinks he knows best.

He's likely to spend himself deep into debt, leaving behind nothing but trouble.

If he's got to this age without learning his lesson, why do you think he would change now.

He has had money £80k!!

No, i wouldn't help him.

Speaking as someone who had a dad like this but worse - don’t go near it. And don’t rush round with spreadsheets to fix things. Don’t you think your mum and others will have tried?

My dad ended up both embroiled with scammers and embezzling money from others.

Do what works for you; take him out to coffee/lunch maybe, buy him a coffee subscription or a sports club membership or whatever would be nice for him for Christmas. Be a good daughter to him. But the most I would do for him financially would be to give him the Step Change number.

Are you going to inherit his property OP?

Was / is he a good dad?

Is £200 a lot of money to you?

These things would influence me.

I agree about help with budgeting but as regards the cash if the answer is yes to my first two questions and no to my third question then personally I would help him but politely make clear that he needed to work within that amount in future.

i would help by going through his income and expenses and looking at where savings could be made- assuming he would accept this help, He could get a job. Many of the invigilators I know are 70 plus so that could be an option,

No way. On 1400 per month with no housing costs he’s got far more disposable income than many.

No. Did he give you any of the 80k?

Agreed, your update changes nothing. I would suggest he was strongly hinting anyway, but even if he wasn't, he has a problem and he's unwilling to face it.

No your update doesn't change anything.

Help by offering to go through his outgoings.

A lodger is a good idea if he has the space. Or is downsizing to free up equity an option? Any chance of him getting a part time job?

But his problem is a classic case of champagne tastes on a lemonade budget, plus an obvious tendency to blow any money that comes his way.

He could have spent 'just' £10/20k of the inheritance on immediate treats and saved the rest to supplement his income, the interest alone on £60k would have given him an extra £200 or so a month, without even touching the capital.

You help him by sitting down with him and help him set a budget/ live within his means.

Posting as someone who has had her own run-in with debt in the past, so I've been the one not facing the numbers. What turned it around for me wasn't anyone handing me cash, it was finally sitting down and writing out every outgoing on a spreadsheet, however grim it looked. Money handed to me would just have kept the habits going a bit longer.

On your update, no, it doesn't change my view. If anything the fact he didn't ask is telling. He knows it is a lot to ask. And if his plan will lose him money, tell him that straight. It might be the kindest thing anyone says to him this month.

What I would offer instead is one sit-down with a few months of bank statements. Just once. If he won't show you the statements, that tells you everything about whether the help would be used properly. You have your own family to look after, and a three-year-old does not get cheaper. It is perfectly possible to love him and still say no.

Suggest he gets a lodger? Some of my older friends have done this.

Nope! Please don’t tell me his suggestion was gambling related…

It is a big nooooooooo from me

He is clearly financially illiterate. £80k invested in a good savings account would have given him around £3,000 a year in additional income, possibly more. I wouldn’t help long term, supermarket wines are usually around 20% cheaper than laithwaites and £100 gym membership is crazy, £50 a month would be more sensible.

Nope. No help.

He's had more than 50 years at least to get to grips with adulting. If he can't manage it at 70 then that's on him.

He was aware he was struggling, and he still decided that rather than using the 80k to fill the deficit in his budget he knows he has, he'd prefer to spunk it all and rely on his daughter to bridge the gap. Selfish behaviour.

No Dad, sorry. You had money and you chose how to spend it. Now you have to chose how to budget and what you can no longer afford. All your choices.

Tell him to get a job!