Hi just wanted to see what people's thoughts and opinions were on how much should be expected of step parents in caring for step children when actual parents aren't available.
My partner has two DD6 & DD3, he alternates between having them 3 nights per week one week and 4 nights per week the next week. I have a DD12 who is with us 7 days a week as her father is not on the scene. We both work full-time.
My partner is currently employed but is trying to go self-employed as a sole trader. As anyone who has gone self employed will know, taking the initial plunge, building up a client base etc takes a lot of work at first, but the hope is it will ultimately pay off leaving him more flexible in the long-term for the kids and family whilst also generating a better income. I work 9-5 5 days a week, so my hours are consistent. As his line of work is seasonal he has managed to get quite a few jobs lined up for himself, but for the time being wants to continue working in the week as employed until sole trader really takes off and their is consistent work. So he will be working all week and weekend bar Sunday afternoon for the foreseeable. Which means I will be caring for the DSDs during the weekend. I don't mind this, I love them to bits and I am already planning days out etc to keep everyone busy. My partner has asked the kids mums if she would mind switching some days, or having them back for a few hours on the Saturday etc just so its not entirely on me but she has said no. Which I understand, as I have been a single mum myself and when my daughter's father did used to have her I relished my time. I also appreciate that it is my partner's choice to work on his days for care of the kids and therefore his problem. But... with working all week, and then caring for kids, whilst battling to get on top of housework, plus make sure everyone has a nice weekend, when do I get a break? The children's mum does not work, with 6 year old in full time school and 3 year old in 3 days a week, I appreciate it is her time but AIBU to think having them for a few hours on Saturday wouldn't be the end of the world?
I know that's selfish on my part and I know the majority reaction will be that Dad should be sorting this out, but I really do want him to get his business off the ground as in the long-term it will be better for all, including the ex, as he will be able to have more flexible hours for picking up and taking to school etc.
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Step-parenting
How much is too much?
101 replies
user1473756940 · 20/06/2018 10:40
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