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Crap Tips

(520 Posts)
TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:15:56

'Things to do with...plastic cd cases. Save lots and paint them with letters for a giant scrabble board'

This handy tip was in last weeks Pick me Up magazine. Why!? and What!?

Share some please, real or made up. I need cheering up.

noddyholder Wed 11-Mar-09 15:17:30

I bought some exfoliating body mitts from boots for cleaning around taps etc TRAGIC!

Made2OrderJelly Wed 11-Mar-09 15:17:38

i just googled 'crap tips' and got a web page on tips on how to play craps (as in a card game i think)

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:18:09

Oh god I love reading my MIL's take a break for these very tips. Look, you can make this useless crap by painting anpother random pile of crap!

I love the pictures as well, some frizzy haired norman pointing at her bird feeder made out of used J-cloths, or something.

Oh dear i can't think of any examples that I have seen. <<useless emoticon>>

Bella73 Wed 11-Mar-09 15:18:17

You are kidding?!

That's hilarious. Wonder what you are meant to use to make your giant scrabble board - your lawn? grin

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:19:52

Another recent favourite was 'things to do with a broken umbrella.... save the handle for poking into hard to reach places...cover the frame in tissue paper and hang by a window fora baby to look at.' teeheeeeeeee

PerArduaAdNauseum Wed 11-Mar-09 15:20:45

@Primark - I think the main question here is, why on earth were you reading 'pick me up' or whatever it's called?

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:22:18

Lol at the umbrella.

Oh why can't I think of any of the ones I have read. Some of them were screamers!

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:23:03

There's a fabulous picture actually, the tip is 'When I've finished my copy of pick me up I use pages of the magazine as a mat under my cats bowl, it looks colourful and keeps the floor clean.' Then there's a picture of a cats bowl, and the magazine. As if we couldn't imagine how that would look. Would have been funnier if the cat was munching away alongside a headline like 'cured by a crane'

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:23:25

PerArdua - it is very necessary to sometimes slum it and read Bella, pick me up and Take a Break. They are very funny. grin

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:24:04

I buy it every week, it's hilarious.

'Brad Pitt helped me jail my Evil Dad' who could resist reading such things?

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:24:30

i now want to go to the shop and shamefacedly buy a copy just to look at the pictures

fryalot Wed 11-Mar-09 15:24:44

I saw one once that said "to preserve the freshness of bread, keep it in a sealed bag/container"

I was shock no shit sherlock!

Made2OrderJelly Wed 11-Mar-09 15:25:55

And the one where the boy puts the t-bag in his football boots made me

What makes people do this stuff??? <baffled>

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:26:35

DWP - do you buy Pick Me Up and and hide it ina copy of Grazia?

BalloonSlayer Wed 11-Mar-09 15:26:44

I used to like the Viz ones, like: Tired of having to wait for a Doctor's appointment? Just make one for every day of the year. Any day you wake up feeling well, phone up and cancel it.

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:27:24

Oh one hilarious one

'put an elastic band around your gravy granules tub, each time you use it move the band down so you can easily tell when you are about to run out'

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:28:12

I buy Pick me up, Peppa Pigs Playland, Vogue and The Guardian all in one go. No shame.

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:28:53

PSML at the gravy granules.

Was there a picture of said gravy granule tub with handy finger pointing towards the elastic band?

BitOfFun Wed 11-Mar-09 15:29:00


"Cut your baby wipes in half, and you will find the tub goes twice as far"

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:29:01

Ha! A fellow reader, M2OJelly that photo is so funny.

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:30:04

There was, you get an extra tenner for photos dontchaknow.

How about a mumsnet challenge, first to get a shit tip published wins a prize.

GetOrfMoiLand Wed 11-Mar-09 15:31:10

baby wipes? Can you imagine changing an epic poo filled nappy and stopping to cut a baby wipe in half? <<mind boggles>>

Made2OrderJelly Wed 11-Mar-09 15:31:28

And the one that says to use and ice cream scoop to put cake mixture in cupcke cases so each 'ball' will be the same, i would love to know what recipe she uses to make her cake mixure come out in balls

I know the mixture i make doesnt come out so it is mouldable into 'balls' hmm

TheDevilWearsPrimark Wed 11-Mar-09 15:31:58

'I hated having change for parking meters on show in my car in case it attracted thieves so now I keep coins under the floormat and no one knows they are there' Illustrated with a picture of about £1.50 in small change on the floor of a car.

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