Benchmark for division of assets etc in a divorce?

[crazyhead]

My sister is getting divorced. She has been a SAHM with pretty much 100% care of her kids (18 months, 3.5) and is going to continue as the very much main carer. OH has his own business. They are early in the process but her and her OH are nowhere near in agreement on finances - they've had nothing but one totally failed mediation session.

OH is thinking from the perspective of splitting assets 50/50, but they don't have that much money between them and obviously it doesn't necessarily work that way with young children involved.

What should they do to push this on so that they are at least arguing in the right ballpark rather than from a widely differing perspective? Is this all about going to solicitors for advice, or are there calculators, books etc that would help them move it on without landing up in court? And how bad is the court option if you just can't reach agreement?

Thanks :(

The business will be an asset has that been taken into account? But often in such non-standard situations you are best with legal advice.

Yes, a Family Law Solicitor will be able to tell her roughly what she's entitled to (I say roughly) because it very much depends on length of marriage (including cohabitation), age of children, his income, assets, debts, standard of living, ages, earning capacity of the parents etc.

Best book I found was Family Law Made Simple by Slater and Gordon. It's available on Kindle and in paperback.

However, I would push your sister to go to a solicitor and take advantage of the half hour free consultation that many of them offer.

Whether or not hiring a solicitor is worth it will depend on her personal situation. A simple solicitor-led divorce is around 5 - 10K. A scrappy divorce is 11K to six figures. It doesn't have to come to that, and in fact, most don't.

If her husband is a 'good earner' and is financially starving her, then there are legal loans that can be obtained. They come with a shocking APR, so can only be worth it if you're going to get a lot more than he's prepared to give.

WellWhoKnew is right that you could get something of an answer from a solicitor but it will cost you a whack of money to get that answer because they will insist on reading everything first. Litigation costs will simply make your eyes water.
At a guess OH is trying to appear generous in splitting the capital 50:50 despite what sounds like quite a small marriage. I suspect he is in fact doing the very opposite as it sounds like the cash value of what he is 'giving' away is very little.
With children that age, the first consideration is going to be keeping them in their home. If there is any way your sister can manage to maintain the outgoings on the house, the overwhelmingly most likely result will be for the transfer of the whole house to her with a charge back to be exercised when the smaller child is 18 of a percentage to be determined by the court. This is a Mesher order. If she cannot afford to sustain the house, she might still get all the capital to buy a smaller one or one in a cheaper area. OH should not imagine he can offer her a useless sum and get away with it.
Moreover, OH is likely to have to pay fairly generous spousal support for a few years at least in order to afford your sister the opportunity first to look after the children while they are pre-school and then to acquire skills in the job market.
By comparison his offer of half the capital might be described as optimistic.
Even though a mediator is not supposed to advise you, may I suggest you go to a mediator who is also a family solicitor. It should cost you about £350 and might well bring OH to a slightly more realistic frame of mind. I should say that you don't actually have a choice as it is now a prerequisite of issuing proceedings.
Whatever you do, do not reach for a solicitor until you have no other choice.

short, not small!

Very helpful - thank you so much. The mediator did say the kind of stuff you indicate, Huppopapa, and her OH didn't want to know. Hopefully it will sink in.

Capital-wise, they each brought 50/50 to the marriage, so getting that out is not a generous split given my sister's childcare responsibilities.

I hope they get there - it is pretty stuff. It is interesting what you say about the solicitor costs....

Meant to say pretty grim stuff