Social services remove kids , mental health

(72 Posts)
Trappedx Wed 24-Nov-21 23:46:57

I need some advice on what to do..

partner stopped taking her medicine in may r and has been relapsing since may

Childrens social services have been involved and due to partners recent manic episodes have said kids not allowed to stay at home.

she is on a section 2 , but due to bed shortages has been left at home with me
She has now restarted her medicine
home treatment team have increased her medicine and come every day to do assessment and keep saying to get pcr test so they can move her to hospital out of area. She is refusing pcr test and I’m stuck at home with her and no kids

any advice???

OP’s posts: |
dane8 Thu 25-Nov-21 00:02:09

You need to have strong words with her, did she willingly let ds take the kids? I know she’s poorly
But those kids most off been distraught.

Try convincing her to have the pcr test, as without that she won’t be going anywhere. Medication takes at least 4-6 weeks to kick in, so your kids could be still in a home at Xmas

Can they not just put her on a section 3 and take her ? Or are they saying no pcr no bed ?
Does she wanna go into hospital?

EllieLucy Thu 25-Nov-21 00:09:25

Anyone you (and DC?) can stay with? I'll bet they take her into hospital if you're not looking after her. After that you tell them she can't come home until stable enough to be around the DC. You can choose to pick DC over her. She chose to come off her meds.

Spidey66 Thu 25-Nov-21 00:24:58

What's her diagnosis? What meds are she supposed to be taking? Is she a risk to the kids or herself?

If she's on a s2, she really should be in hospital. They can nurse her separately until she's had a negative pcr test.

Trappedx Thu 25-Nov-21 00:26:47

We have a plo coming up next week, social worker says if no change then going to court proceedings , I’ve told them I’ll move with my kids as they come first I’ll move temporarily with some family

Then leave her in the house on her own under a section

OP’s posts: |
Rogue1001 Thu 25-Nov-21 00:30:06

Prioritise the children or risk losing the children

TooBigForMyBoots Thu 25-Nov-21 00:34:16

What ages are the children and who is looking after them?

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Luzina Thu 25-Nov-21 00:36:26

Ask social services for support for you and children to go and stay elsewhere

Where are your children at the moment? Are they with family?

Trappedx Thu 25-Nov-21 00:44:05

Children 12 and 14 , sofa surfing with family

Should social services do more to re-house me snd the kids until the hospital can find a bed for my partner

Section 2 means they should have took her, but they left her at home with me

Social worker has said so far they can have contact with mum for an hour but not allowed to sleep in their own home.

OP’s posts: |
Luzina Thu 25-Nov-21 00:48:59

Ask for help. Explain you want to prioritise your children but need somewhere to live temporarily with them. Keep asking for support. Are social services happy for you to have care of the children?

LemonSwan Thu 25-Nov-21 01:17:26

The NHS aren't going to bother finding a space if they dont have to.

As harsh as it is you need to get her out the house and not let her back in. Call the police and the crisis team. Once the police have her they will have to take her to a place of safety/ hospital. They will find space.

You need to get your children back now. Its going to be fucking horrific and I am so sorry but she will thank you eventually when she gets better and realises it was that or losing the children.

Goodluck flowers

Luredbyapomegranate Thu 25-Nov-21 01:27:54

Sorry to hear all this.

But you need to get her out and your kids back. Your priority has to be them.

Trappedx Thu 25-Nov-21 07:06:07

Thanks for all replies..this is what the issue is

The police have attended and mental health crisis team ..they did mental health act and sectioned her but told me no beds and they would be in touch!! And just left on my head now

I work full time so not baby sitting her, surely this can’t be the norm. Police said they won’t take her it’s up to mental health team but they can assist..MH team and Childrens social services can’t agree.

She was more unstable prior to restarting her meds I feel I’m being bullied by CSC using my kids as pawns.

I’ve said I’d leave and stay with my kids if they are going to remove them ..my kids come first

OP’s posts: |
Simonjt Thu 25-Nov-21 07:12:54

I was the patient in this situation about eight years ago, my friends took me to A&E who were unable to discharge me so had no choice but to find a bed, even if it was the ‘wrong’ bed for a few days.

ChristmasScrooge Thu 25-Nov-21 07:13:21

No don't leave. You tell them she can't stay with you or the kids and has nowhere to stay so they have to section her today. If you leave. They won't bother finding her a place and they won't rehome you as you technically have a home.

Put your foot down.

Bagelsandbrie Thu 25-Nov-21 07:15:56

ChristmasScrooge

No don't leave. You tell them she can't stay with you or the kids and has nowhere to stay so they have to section her today. If you leave. They won't bother finding her a place and they won't rehome you as you technically have a home.

Put your foot down.

This. You need to get her out and the kids back.

NynaeveSedai Thu 25-Nov-21 07:18:39

Trappedx

Children 12 and 14 , sofa surfing with family

Should social services do more to re-house me snd the kids until the hospital can find a bed for my partner

Section 2 means they should have took her, but they left her at home with me

Social worker has said so far they can have contact with mum for an hour but not allowed to sleep in their own home.

You have a house. Rehousing can take months - she needs to leave the house, harsh as that sounds. You need to take responsibility for your children and get her to leave. I know you will feel bad and responsible for her but your children come first.

Totallydefeated Thu 25-Nov-21 07:23:49

ChristmasScrooge

No don't leave. You tell them she can't stay with you or the kids and has nowhere to stay so they have to section her today. If you leave. They won't bother finding her a place and they won't rehome you as you technically have a home.

Put your foot down.

This. It’s fucking outrageous that they are putting your kids in this position by failing to act in accordance with their responsibilities, and then arranging a hearing as though you are the problem.

Start making a LOT of noise. Tell them you’re no longer allowing her back in the house. Ring the MH and SS teams twice daily. Escalate up the chain. Tell them you’re going to involve your MP. Make it clear they need to find a solution and act and stop fannying around ASAP.

OverTheRubicon Thu 25-Nov-21 07:24:46

ChristmasScrooge

No don't leave. You tell them she can't stay with you or the kids and has nowhere to stay so they have to section her today. If you leave. They won't bother finding her a place and they won't rehome you as you technically have a home.

Put your foot down.

This. Appreciate this is a horrendous situation, but you cannot put her desire not to do a PCR above your kids' need for a home.

If you love your kids, you'll need to get her out one way or another - by doing the PCR and going to hospital in the correct way, by telling the team you can no longer care for her, or if she's in a state to be sectioned (and either she's even a half decent mother normally, she must be very very unwell to be putting her desire not to do a PCR/leave the house over her kids' wellbeing) do that.

Monsterjam Thu 25-Nov-21 07:30:04

I suspect she is liable to be detained or the AMHP has used their right to wait 14 days before signing the MHA papers… neither of which mean she is actually subject to Section 2 and both have time limits on them after which the whole process of being assessed may have to start again .

Tarne Thu 25-Nov-21 07:31:29

Op imagine how worried sick your DC are! They need you and they are vulnerable.

You are not a qualified mental health nurse or practitioner and you work full time so leaving her in your home is senseless negligence.

You need to prioritize your DC because if you don't no one else will.

Don't do this to your DC. If they have been living with a mentally ill person up until now imagine the trauma and devastating I pact this will have on their young impressionable lives.

That coupled with lockdown I really do not understand why your instinct is not prioritizing your DC's welfare.

How you have been manipulated into this no win situation?

Time to say enough is enough. You cannot turn the safe haven and peace of your DC's home into a secure mental health ward when you are not even equipped nor do you have the resources or qualifications for that role.

You are a parent. You cannot do both.

Get her out now and apologise and make up to your poor DC. This will have been utterly heartbreaking and traumatising for them.

Trappedx Thu 25-Nov-21 07:40:52

This is the thing she has been sectioned officially but just left at home. This will be her 3rd detention in hospital if they take her but they are not doing so.
Police won’t remove her and keep her in cell until they got a bed even out of area I’ve have requested this but no joy

Previous times she was sectioned they took her straight away ..this is pure torture for me and kids

MH team and Dr come every day assess her , tell me she is improving but needs hospital but they have no beds and then leave me with her

Is this even legally allowed?
Section 2 is to detain and treat , is there any organisations or other services that can help

OP’s posts: |
Crazydoglady1980 Thu 25-Nov-21 07:43:29

Contact your local housing and advise that you are being made homeless by the situation. Take the PLO paperwork, which I assume states that the children can not stay at home with your wife and ask the social worker to write a supporting letter to this effect. You maybe offered homeless accommodation while housing assess, during this time either your wife will be admitted to hospital or her medication will start to take affect which may mean you can have a rational conversation with her about what to do.
You will then be able to attend the PLO and explain what steps you have taken to safeguard the children and offer some security

Crazydoglady1980 Thu 25-Nov-21 07:44:51

Also contact Mind and Pals. They maybe able to offer support and advice regarding your wife.

NinetyNineRedBalloonsGoBy Thu 25-Nov-21 07:47:19

Get a PCR test delivered to your house?
Do the test, get the results in a couple of days. They can then take her and your kids come home. Problem solved.

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