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Right, someone convince me it's not long now...please!

(965 Posts)
MidnightinMoscow Mon 05-Mar-12 07:12:14

I am 38+3 with DC2. Hoping for a VBAC after an EMCS for DC1 with who I got to 9cm's with.

I have had period cramps for over a week, two lots of plug coming away and last night lots of tight feelings high in my bump. The period like cramps are really painful and often are alongside sharp pains down below.

I have a week to go into labour, otherwise I am booked for a CS. I am so fed up of symptom spotting and being in this 'is it- is it not?' place. I went into labour at 38+4 with DC1.

So someone come along and tell me lie to me that todays the day. grin

Lemele Mon 23-Apr-12 22:38:54

Yes it was hard, and very tiring/stressful/tearful, but once I gave up the ebm things got so much better. Mostly because they'd been so bad before, it all felt a little bit amazing afterwards!! (For a little while!) The main thing was just being so achey and tired, and so, not feeling up to doing things with ds1. We've got into a few bad habits now but we're pretty good at kicking bad habits when we decide to so hopefully he won't complain too much... (He's a dear really, and very good most of the time). Eating in front of the telly etc etc...

I'm more or less managing to keep up expressing but it's - fun? - trying to breastfeed one baby, bottle feed the other, and express as well, all the while trying to keep toddler amused! Had to do that a few times now... To be honest it's mostly selfish reasons I'm still breastfeeding really - I just cant imagine not having milk on tap, i.e. if they were hungry and we ran out of formula that would seem very weird.. dunno why. Left boob still painful but seems I can do one feed a day without it hurting now, so shall just gradually increase that I guess. Still not sure I can face bf two at once though...

Oh joys twins are still not settled better go. Sorry for slight ramble of a post!

DreamingOfPeace Fri 20-Apr-12 16:03:45

Oh midnight. It seems so important now, but when she's 21 you won't be worrying about how you fed her for the first 6 months/year of her life. If it was causing that much pain you made the right decision. It's not like your DD won't thrive on ff and she's had some bm. Isn't the first 3 days the most important anyway and she had that? I can't find time to pump at all, not surprised you didn't think it was sustainable.

I am.cheerful now, but find that in the evening my babies are both refluxy and unhappy, I can't calm them down, I get desperate and tearful as I'm so tired and everything seems dreadful...

MidnightinMoscow Fri 20-Apr-12 13:35:44

That sounds hard Lemele, especially after three days.

I am feeling blue. I have stopped BF and feel dreadful about it. I had to stop pumping, I just couldn't cope with fitting it in with looking after both DC's etc.
Also, I felt so ill for a few weeks, I had a dreadful chest and ear infection for two weeks after DD was born.

But know that I feel better, I keep thinking about why I did not try harder to BF her. I could have contacted a lactation consultant etc, but I was just so scared of letting her latch again as my nipples were so wrecked and blackened.

I had PND with my DS and I am so worried this is going to kickstart it again.

Why I am so crap at all this birthing/feeding buisness?

Sorry for the miserable me,me,me post.

LittleStranger Thu 19-Apr-12 20:22:56

Congrats to all with their long awaited babies.
My mum bought me a subscription to Mother and Baby magazine and as I was flicking through today there was an article on overdue babies which had me shouting 'they're not overdue till 42 weeks!' at the page.

However Fliss has given me hope that if I ever have a third my body may yet manage to go into labour of it's own accord..,

DreamingOfPeace Thu 19-Apr-12 17:43:59

Oh my goodness lemele, back at work 3 days after you were home must have been hard. Dh is back at work on Monday. Dreading it as I'll have less help and I feel exhausted as it is. And we're still not up and out at DDs normal activities etc. She's going with a grandparent at the minute. Nights are no better here...

Lemele Thu 19-Apr-12 14:46:59

Dreaming when does your dh go back to work? I am currently glad (usually hate it) that my hubby works evenings - I struggle in the 3 hours before ds1 goes to bed but then I can focus on the twins for a bit and attempt to settle them for bed which so far fails frequently lol. It also means he's around most daytimes, which has been eternally helpful, especially since he was back at work 3 days after I was home from hospital!

DreamingOfPeace Tue 17-Apr-12 16:31:26

Oh dolly, what a nightmare... It's so distressing when they're inconsolable and you just want to make them better.

Mine are both a bit refluxy, very unsettled til about 1am n need holding up for up to an hour after feeds. Don't know how I'll manage them once dh back at work...

MidnightinMoscow Tue 17-Apr-12 16:24:52

Fliss, congratulations. What an amazing weight. Hope you are both doing well.

Hardcheese it's totally normal to feel like that, it's such a time of transition. If it helps I have weeped about BF too. I have stopped pumping now, as I just could not keep it up and look after DS as well as DD. I continue to keep thinking, what if I tried once more, gone back to the breastfeeding cafe once more etc, etc.

Dolly sorry to hear that DD2 has reflux. Do you think she has colic too? I found cutting out dairy in my diet helped DS when I was BF'ing. Hope things improve soon, sounds stressful.

dreaming and lem you are both doing amazingly.

DaydreamDolly Sun 15-Apr-12 20:01:03

Fliss congratulations! Cant believe his weight you must have been pretty uncomfortable! Amazing!
Tears all the time here. DD2 has reflux which makes her scream uncontrollably for a lot of the time. Poor DD1 is having to listen to it. DH on business trip all week back next Saturday. I feel pretty desperate tbh. Am at my parents tonight which is a great help but I still have to deal with the poor baby screaming in pain. She's on Gaviscon but still suffering angry

DreamingOfPeace Sun 15-Apr-12 18:14:27

And hardcheese, nappy rash is totally deserving of tears. DD had one for the first time ever when i left her with dh and went to pre-op and he didnt notice she'd done a poo... I cried over that and that wasn't post partum!!!

DreamingOfPeace Sun 15-Apr-12 18:12:51

Oh the relief that its not just me being rubbish by weeping over how tired I am! I can't nap in the day- I try, and a rest is better than nothing, but sleep eludes me even though I'm so tired... Which leads to meltdowns in the night. My most embarrassing being last night when i had to go and wake dh from other room, sobbing about how it was so late, and neither baby would stop feeding, I had sore nipples, and i hadn't even lain down yet let alone slept and please just make the f*ing babies go to f*ing sleep.... Productive and mature, no?!

Gosh, sounds really time consuming and hard work hardcheese, you're doing amazingly to be persevering through all that, massive respect to you.

I'm going to Google that podcast soon flip, sounds like just what I need to help shake the feeling I'm Not Doing Very Well (dh or family looking after DD, I struggle at night & the day if constant feeding, and def in the evening , not been out with boys and DD yet, just her going out with daddy/ Gps and boys 11 days old today) . It's just so hard to find a time with two fed babies with clean nappies to be able to get out and stick to DDs nap time- which is essential or bedtime goes to hell in a handbasket... Must try harder...

HardCheese Sun 15-Apr-12 17:12:09

FLISS congratulations!!!!!! delighted you managed to avoid induction by doing it yourself - sorry to hear of things getting hairy an the PPH, but what a size! Well done! I bet he's a gorgeous wee (or not so wee?) armful!

Am also in awe of those coping with twins, and dreaming, I am also a weeping wreck from lack of sleep and inability to BF - saw BF counsellor today, and am trying an SNS to see if I can increase my supply, but it's terribly fiddly and time-consuming with nipple shields as well, AND still trying to express eight times a day... Everthing makes me cry, from TV programmes about the Titanic, to Easter music, to our little boy's nappy rash...

FlipFantasia Sun 15-Apr-12 15:03:11

Fliss huge congratulations grin - I am so glad you managed to avoid induction (clever body going into labour by itself!) and labour at home but wow, sounds like you had a time of it. That is an amazing weight - I bet he's totally gorgeous! Hope you're not feeling too wrecked after the PPH - enjoy all the newborn snuggles!

Dreaming & Lem I bow to your twin-ness. DD is 3 weeks today and I was so knackered yesterday morning that I was bawling (think it's a growth spurt). How you're managing with two is beyond me [respect]. I've had no problems with BFing this time (thank god, as it was a hellish couple of months with DS when establishing BFing), but the sheer relentlessness of it has me exhausted. The all night feeding...I have to keep reminding myself that This Too Shall Pass.

There's an amazing podcast series called The Longest Shortest Time, just about this phase. How intense the baby stage is, even though it really does fly by (even if we can't see it right now). Had me in tears does not take much to reduce me to tears at the mo.

DreamingOfPeace Sun 15-Apr-12 12:01:02

11lb 7 fliss!!! Wow. Well done you. I hope you don't feel too terrible after such a big PPH, anaemia tiredness on top of newborn baby tiredness is brutal. Big congratulations on your baby boy, enjoy him now he's here :-)

Jess happy sweeping tomorrow, May it start your labour instantly.

lemele I think it is more the sleep deprivation making me crazy. And I am going more than a bit crazy... Crying at the drop of a hat, or even the mere suspicion a hat may be dropped... Both babies gaining weight being ebf, don't know when I'd find time to express. The mw yesterday when i told her how exhausted I feel and how bf all night long is killing me just said my babies are so windy and vomity that bottles/ formula will only make that worse and add in more chores with making bottles and probably not give me more sleep as the settling will be even more long drawn out and i should just persevere... :-( Oh the dilemma, but I'm not quite broken enough to quit yet though how long I can carry on I don't know

artifarti Sun 15-Apr-12 11:51:31

Congratulations Fliss! Wow, what a big boy! Sorry it got a bit dramatic at the end by the sound of it but hurray for no induction.

seemedlikeagudideaatthetime Sun 15-Apr-12 11:45:04

fliss, omg - well done you!!! grin

Jess850 Sun 15-Apr-12 10:54:32

Fliss WOW!
Congratulations on Your bouncing Baby Boy.
Have you named him?
No movement here at 40+4, first sweep tomorrow afternoon.
Hormonal is not the word.

Flisspaps Sun 15-Apr-12 10:49:58

DS born at 8am today, in hospital, forceps. 1500 ml PPH shock

Laboured at home for 25 hours with water and G&A s and transferred in an ambulance after an hour of pushing and no movement (well, not baby movement anyway blush)

Mind you, at 11lb 7 he wasn't going to be shifted easily.... no, not a typo. The growth scan was wrong...and not In a good way hmm

seemedlikeagudideaatthetime Sat 14-Apr-12 17:14:33

hi all, just popping in to check up on you all grin

yes the no co sleeping thing in hospital was apparently about babies falling out of beds. I was pretty anti cosleeping before this baby, but it's made my nights soooo much better - not been brave enough for lying-down feeding yet, just getting the hang of the 'normal' kind, although that is going well thankfully, my comedy boobs have gone right down - phew

anybody else struggling to remember what it was they did all day before every waking minute centred around feeding, wiping and cleaning up after a baby??? hmm

I do kinda love it though, and even though I'm missing sleep I'm getting a sense of how precious this time is and it'll be over so quickly really. We're already planning a second child but it wont be the same with a toddler about aswell...

Flisspaps Fri 13-Apr-12 16:03:35

HardCheese thank you grin think I just need a kick up the arse, this baby WILL come, clearly it's not finished up with whatever it's doing in there and is still preparing for a grand entrance smile

Lemele Fri 13-Apr-12 15:13:13

Aw dreaming, sending lots of virtual hugs, reading your post is like reading an autobiography...

I used to fully believe the thing about babies not going back to the boob if you give them bottles (especially since my DS1 had tremendous problems with boob vs bottle, because he was given bottles on day 1 by the hospital without actually asking me). But I was going insane, and after 11 days (and nights) of hell this time round I was finally persuaded by my husband (and a midwife, who was very concerned about my health both mentally and physically) to give up the breastfeeding. I am not the kind of person to give up anything - after all, I carried on BF my DS1 for 8 months despite it being awful, depressing, and making me never want to go out, cry in public, etc! - so it was quite a choice for me!

But anyway the thing is, despite being dreadful and one having a crack about a cm long and probably half a cm deep that just bled and scabbed and yuck, my boobs were almost back to normal within 3 days! This is with me expressing as well - I just began gently at first and now it's pain-free. I don't really feel mentally up to going back to BF full-time yet but I've tried the twins on the boob a few times each and they've been fine - latched on just as quickly (if not quicker) than they ever did, and also pain-free (only tried on the healthier boob as yet though, still a bit scared about the other one lol). I can't believe the difference having a few days off made.

Interestingly enough I've discovered that one twin feeds in a much more uncomfy way to the other one and I wonder if it was partly that that stopped me healing up. I'm sure all advice would say he's not latching properly but as far as I can tell he's the same as his bro... But anyway, maybe I'm just lucky that they seem to be able to both bottle and boob feed after only 11 days, but knowing what I've been through I encourage you to look after yourself as well as them! If you're expressing they still get your goodness too of course. I feel sane again, like almost normal person again. But even if the twins hadn't been able to do both bottle and boob I would still be glad I'd given up. wine

I'm amazed you're trying to tandem... I'd advise giving up tandem feeding for the moment because it is such a stress and you can't get them latched on properly etc. Does one twin sleep more easily than the other? Feed the wakey one first and let the other doze if possible. Or wake one first, or whatever. And I heartily sympathise with the threat of waking up your other child - so irritating isn't it! ...and you're scared of giving dummies for the same reasons.. sad

Anyhoo, hope some of this helps coz I well and truly know what you're going through! thanks

HardCheese Fri 13-Apr-12 14:08:45

Fliss, sending you all my best wishes. My little boy is now, astonishingly, ten days old, and has gone to sleep for once, which is why I'm on here, while trying to express my apparently non-existent milk from slightly shredded nipples. Sympathies to everyone else with breast-feeding difficulties - it is just miserable.

I found my consultant unexpectedly sympathetic in the event, when I was in having the CTG and BPP at 40+10 - maybe yours will be more respectful of your views than you think, Fliss? I wish I could think of something more helpful to say, as you've been such a support to me all along through the horrors of overdueness. But will be thinking of you, and all other overdue people.

Joygirl78 Fri 13-Apr-12 11:16:48

flisspaps sending you labour vibes. My girl is now 17 days already! Can't believe I was the first response on this thread that many weeks ago, seems like an eternity ago.
Love to all waiting ladies and new born babies X

DreamingOfPeace Fri 13-Apr-12 08:33:32

Oh. And waiting for epidurals in our trust is common, not unlucky (its the one that keeps making national news for being on Red Alert for poor care, a red Alert area being maternity services). The anaesthetist covers intensive care, emergencies plus maternity. Not ideal. So if someone is very sick anywhere else there's no chance of one. Another reason I chose ELCS not induction. The CS was fine, but my stomach is ? irritated by the painkillers- vomiting by day 6 (total agony on the scar!) and still really nauseous etc now. But recovery otherwise far better than my last delivery so far!

DreamingOfPeace Fri 13-Apr-12 08:26:27

It will happen fliss, stay strong in the Chat of Doom. 2-3 cm must mean something, eventually. And you can't stay pg forever!!

lemele, the constant bf is so painful and never-ending and I've got cracked, sore nipples from having no hands to sort out crap latches when tandem feeding at night as quietly as possible to not have DD wake up too... I can't make time to read threads on here most days, let alone post. Plus dh was admitted on medical wards day 2 post CS for us (with wierd muscle weakness so he couldn't do poppers on a babygrow, squeeze toothpaste-scarily weak scarily fast, diagnosis polymyositis), is improving but not right so very dependent on family help for DD and I'm stuck being outnumbered by the twins a lot. He's improving, so its improving, but I'm struggling with the no sleep exhaustion. I was right-mw and registrar said twin 2 was breech, I said head down, he came out head down!!!
I keep being told if I give the babies bottles of expressed milk now they won't go back on the boob- they're 9 days old today... True or total rubbish?! I had another hellish night last night, getting desperate!

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