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As we go through this painful journey together

(986 Posts)
lavandes Sun 10-Feb-13 21:24:05

As we go through this painful journey together we share, cry, scream and shout but we never judge, we know that there is always someone to listen. We always remember our precious children who will never be forgotten and will live on forever in our hearts.

shabbatheGreek Fri 08-Mar-13 07:27:58

Morning girls xx

I have an apology to make to all of you. Im sorry for being so bloody depressing last night. At first, I thought to myself, Im not going to put it on this thread or the multiple births thread. Then I did!!! Thank you all for your kind words and support. Today is another day....onwards and upwards and all that crap.


whiteandyellowiris Fri 08-Mar-13 07:29:48

Please don't pull out of the thread shabbs, we want to be here to support you x x I want you to have somewhere to talk about your worries
Please stay

shabbatheGreek Fri 08-Mar-13 08:11:22

Oh dont worry - have been with our thread from the first message on the first day and wont go anywhere. I may flounce out from time to time but I always come back!!! I just felt a bit odd about spreading my sadness about last night.


whiteandyellowiris Fri 08-Mar-13 09:06:39

sad ok shabbs, yeah we all need a break from things from time to time, even this threadsad i know i've ducked out of this thread for a while

anything to get through it, whatever works

just know im thinking of you and your lovely dad and boys xx

shabbatheGreek Fri 08-Mar-13 09:20:57

Thank you, I appreciate that xxx

chipmonkey Fri 08-Mar-13 10:26:31

Shabs, why shouldn't you have posted? We are all here to support each other. God, if we weren't allowed to post when we were feeling depressed, the thread would be fairly empty!

shabbatheGreek Fri 08-Mar-13 10:29:21

LOL - I know xxx

I never know when to shut up though smile

chipmonkey Fri 08-Mar-13 10:44:37

Never shut up shabba! We love your babble!

shabbatheGreek Fri 08-Mar-13 10:54:25


CheeseandGherkins Fri 08-Mar-13 11:29:35

Hello again, not been on here in a while but thought I'd poke my head in. I've taken down my profile for the time being just in case there are people from irl nosing, I feel more comfortable that way for now. I have some of you on fb and have been talking on there but I've missed it here!

Hope everyone is coping ok x

MiaAlexandrasmummy Fri 08-Mar-13 16:51:07

Hello all, I saw this on the USA Compassionate Friends site today, and it struck a chord. In response to those people who tell us that we should stop crying about our beautiful children, and as we worry about the health of all those we love :-

Tears have a wisdom all of their own. They come when a person has relaxed enough to let go and to work through the sorrow. They are the natural bleeding of an emotional wound, carrying the poison out of the system.

Especially for shabba, cafe, my five and white's little DD... but well, it's for everyone here really.

whiteandyellowiris Fri 08-Mar-13 18:53:25

thanks mias mummy, for thinking of my dd,that has really touched me, that is a lovely quote.

dh has decided that dds problem, well part of it, is that shes not getting enough sleep, so hes decided to turn her light off at night
as she sleeps with the light on, as shes frightened of the dark.

i don't think this is a good idea, seems cruel to me,esp when shes having a hardtime but he says i don't listen to his ideas.

cafecito Fri 08-Mar-13 20:59:14

oh shabba you're so used to being everyone else's rock - you need support tlc or even just containment/venting space too, let's call it 'supervision' grin

please do not apologise ever ever ever!! and carry on posting depressing things whenever it's with you- honestly, I'm just sorry I have nothing useful to say

mias thank you for that quote, I think that's very true.

not sure about DD white- I don't have experience of an older child's potential grief iyswim. Obvously sleep is important but so is emotional wellbeing, of course.

My5boysandme Fri 08-Mar-13 22:46:48

white we have this night light for our oldest son(who is scared of the dark since Dexter died)

night light

It's motion sensored. It has two settings on constant, then auto. We leave it on til we go to bed then turn it on to auto. It then only comes on if there is movement in the room.

mia what a touching quote and so very true x

shabbatheGreek Sat 09-Mar-13 11:00:26

Morning girls xx

MiaAlexandrasmummy Sat 09-Mar-13 22:34:43

Sending love to everyone. <deep breath> We can do it.

whiteandyellowiris Sat 09-Mar-13 23:49:51

hi everyone x thinking of you all tomorrow xxx much love and hope its a gentle day x

shabbatheGreek Sun 10-Mar-13 08:55:55

Morning girls xx

Its just another day my friends....just another day.

Have lit my candles here in Lancashire to show my love for our children who are not physically here. xxx

CheeseandGherkins Sun 10-Mar-13 09:29:27

Morning. I'll be lighting candles today too. Very bittersweet day. It's snowing here, wonder if it'll settle.

DreamsTurnToGoldDust Sun 10-Mar-13 09:43:01

I hope you dont mind or think that I`m intruding if I just drop some thanks for everyone and to say `much love` to you all today x

shabbatheGreek Sun 10-Mar-13 09:47:31

Thank you Dreams x

mumof2teenboys Sun 10-Mar-13 10:26:40

I keep thinking its just another day, this too shall pass. It hurts, I wish James was here. Sam came down this morning and said 'Happy Mothers Day, I love you" but it hurts.

shabbatheGreek Sun 10-Mar-13 10:29:49

I think this hurt is the price we pay for loving our children so much. I think that if it didn't hurt so much we wouldn't be 'normal' - whatever the hell normal is. Dont think I have been 'normal' for a long time smile


whiteandyellowiris Sun 10-Mar-13 10:46:37

thanks dreams

i need to get a special candle to light on special days

i'll find one out for today though

i've got my lovely dd and my own mum, but i do find this a difficult day.keep trying to think its just another day

much love to you ds xxxxxx
love you always xxx
miss you everyday x

Helyantha Sun 10-Mar-13 11:22:56

I thank God every day for the gift of motherhood, but the love it brings hurts my heart beyond words on days like today. I promised myself that the loss of DS3 would not define us as a family, especially with DS2's health issues, but today I feel so isolated, so sad again; so different sad
I will light a candle for all our angel children and remember the joy. All will be well.
Love to all xx

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