to give ds cereal for dinner?

[summerisover]

not sure if it is a phase he's going through but ds (2)normally very good at eating anything put down to him has been driving me round the bend with his dinner escapades tonight.

I'm not feeding him poison, I swear, but home made sweet and sour chicken and plain boiled rice. Took ages to cook (am annoyed at that too). Most has went in the bin as it has been offered to him twice now.

First there was a lot of head turning and spitting out. Also trying to get dd(3) to eat her dinner quickly in time to get ready for ballet. So in the end, before I lost it completely, ds was put in his cot (which he thought was a great game) while I calmed down and made sure dd ate some and got her dressed. dh took her to ballet while I got ds out the cot and tried giving him the same dinner again. Same tactics and screaming as if i'm doing something painful to him.

So in the end I gave up.

he's now quite happily eating a bowl of cheerios (without milk) on the floor....

I could scream..............

[prettyfly1]

Um, I will be FLAMED FOR THIS as my opinions on food are distinctly un mumsnet but YABU. You shouldnt have given him cereal or anything for that matter. I am of the old "eat what I give you or go without" school of thought. The children in this house are aware that I wont make a fuss if they dont eat thier dinner but they wont get anything else so are choosing hunger as an alternative.

Of course he is happy. He has gotten tons of attention out of you, and been rewarded with some delicious cereal to placate him - ten to one says you have the same palaver tomorrow night as well.

[mustrunmore]

Was it first time he's had it? If so, you've gotta cut him some slack, he actually might not like it! But if he's just being pedantic, I wouldn't have let him have the cheerios. Maybe I''m a bad parent. But here the boys get treats and extras before bed if they've had a really good stab at their tea. If not, nothing else that evening. Unless dh is home, in which case they whine and he gives them a banana in bed

[Tombliboobs]

I agree with prettyfly1

[UndeadLentil]

That sounds very stressful summer.

I would offer the dinner, and then nothing else. If he chooses to reject it, then he will have to go a bit hungry and have fruit after to fill up a bit.

Cheerios are very sweet, and if he thinks he can hold out on proper dinner and get them, he will. Well, I would ...

2 year-olds find it very hard to sit and concentrate on dinner, so maybe dish up a very small portion of normal dinner tomorrow and praise any eating to the nines.

They also really love power, so be clear about staying in control.

Does this help at all?
Chatting to him about the new rules would be good too of course.

[GoppingOtter]

dont mind cereal but cheerios
1.nestle

1. might as well give sweets

[bigchris]

agree with prettyfly too
tomorrow's another day though so don't beat yourself up over it

[meemarsgotabrandnewbump]

Has he eaten that dish before? I think if he genuinely didn't like it then there is no problem making an alternative, but it should be something nutritious.

The problem is with giving him something like cheerios, they are like sweets. It's like he is being given a reward for not eating his food.

[monkeyfeathers]

I wouldn't worry about it. 2 years are often nightmares to feed. The best you can do is offer them food and hope they eat it. There's no point getting stressed over it. I wouldn't worry at all about him having cheerios tonight. He'll eat like a normal person when he's a bit older; at the moment it's not worth worrying about fussy eating.

In future, I'd only offer him a meal once though and not give a fig if he refused it (easier said than done). You don't want meal times turning into a power struggle as it'll only make things worse.

[summerisover]

hmmm....when I say cheerios I mean shops own brand variety...

and he's just turned 2 so not really into a chat about ground rules....more likely to point a my eyes and start naming all face parts.....

will try banana now....

[Morloth]

We went with "eat it or not, no skin off my nose".

Sometimes he choose to go to bed with no dinner as is his right. Now the little garbage can will eat anything.

Don't engage.

[Bleatblurt]

YANBU. He's 2. It's not a regular thing so no point getting all of you stressed when he'll probably go back to eating well again tomorrow. I'd have offered cereal too as I wouldn't send him to be hungry.

[Bleatblurt]

bed, even. Stupid fat fingers.

[Eve4Walle]

I know someone who gives her kids cereal for dinner every night. She is very well-to-do with huge house and a Nanny but has 4 kids and sees it as an easy option. I was very when I found out but she says they have a cooked lunch so can't be too judgey.

[DorotheaPlentighoul]

Don't worry about it, YANBU

[Morloth]

You don't need to chat, if he doesn't eat it or screws around (spitting and throwing), you take it away. That was dinner, tough luck if you are hungry.

I never bothered to re-offer either. He always ate well at the next meal. Good for him to know what hungry feels like in between.

[Eve4Walle]

I agree with Morloth. If DS refuses at lunch, I know he'll eat at dinner so I don't worry too much.

[lolapoppins]

You eat what you are given in my house or go without too.

[Bleatblurt]

I think 2 is a bit young to understand the 'eat or go hungry' rule. I know loads on here disagree though.

[summerisover]

just checked cereal box - honestly never knew the amount of sugar in them (was fooled by the 4 multigrain marketing wording)!

Claiming ignorance because I don't eat them and dh bought them....
the things you learn!

Now has banana and munching away...

wasn't the first time he had the meal, but first in ages, so maybe tastes change....

Better eat the pumpkin and cinnamon soup tomorrow!
Feel like I've spent all day in the kitchen!

[Morloth]

We started way before 2.

[GoppingOtter]

morloth as an aside- i am convinced half the obesity problems are caused as people nowadays never get to feel really hungry - too much snacking

hence appetite for the good stuff suppressed

[meemarsgotabrandnewbump]

To those who are strict with the 'eat or go without' rule, do you make allowances for the fact that the child might not like something?

I know when kids are older there is usually something they can eat at a meal so they wont starve, but at age 2 lots of dishes are still a novelty and an aquired taste.

I think if my toddler was spitting out a dish because they didn't like it I'd rather make him a sandwich that he would eat, rather than leave him hungry.

I wouldn't give 'treat food' as an alternative though.

[Morloth]

I agree GoppingOtter it is good to know what hungry feels like. And to appreciate being able to eat your fill when you have been hungry.

Not the constant snacking and stuff that seems to go on.

[GColdtimer]

I have to agree butterball, DD is 3 and half and we do that to great effect now but at 2 if DD didn't eat her dinner, I wouldn't make a fuss and then would wait for an hour or so and give her a bowl of porridge or toast or a banana before bed (none of which she was particularly enamoured with so wasn't a treat). Otherwise you just have hungry child up all night and at that age they don't really get it (imo).

I probably would have given him fruit or toast but not cheerios but I wouldn't say YABU if its a one off.

[Morloth]

There is always something on the plate that I know he likes (or in the early days something fairly innocuous like mash potatoes or rice or something).