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to have had a bit of a row with another woman at work who reckons I had a hard labour because "I Wasn't doing it right"

(99 Posts)
Notalone Fri 11-Jul-08 21:00:22

She actually believes that the reason she had a 6 hour labour start to finish is because she had her breathing sorted and the reason I had a 27 hour labour is because I didn't. She also said it is not painful and I am lying about how hard I found it. Also I had to have stitches - again because I wasn't doing it right and didn't listen to the midwife whereas she did. I am afraid I kind of flipped a bit at this point and said it might have had something to do with the size of her fanjo and not bloody breathing at all blush

Ok. Rant over!

micci25 Fri 11-Jul-08 21:03:40

well i must have stopped breathing altogether with dd1!! lazy little bint took over 48hrs to come out!!!

lol at what you said to her!! she deseverd it!!

Notalone Fri 11-Jul-08 21:04:40

Well you just CANNOT have been doing it right Micci. The cheek of you blaming your DD grin

alicet Fri 11-Jul-08 21:04:51

Don't blame you for flipping out! pmsl at your come back though!

People like this are one of my pet hates. Its not a f*cking competition for god's sake! Some people have an easy time spawny fucking bastards lucky people - others don't . Thats life.

And while you can TRY to make a difference by being mobile etc sometimes things just don't work out that way, esp first time.

uberalice Fri 11-Jul-08 21:05:40

YANBU. I bet she's a PFB as well.

alicet Fri 11-Jul-08 21:06:33

I had an emergency c-sction with my first after getting to 9cm as he was distressed. If she had made a similar comment to me I think I would have ripped her head off! I am just happy that my little boy is healthy and happy as am I. Thats all that matters surely - not how / how long they take to come out?

Cammelia Fri 11-Jul-08 21:06:42

angry at stupid woman.

My first labour 7 hours

My second labour 22 hours

You would have thought I'd learnt to do it right after the first time wouldn't you grin

Pruners Fri 11-Jul-08 21:07:08

Message withdrawn

TheProvincialLady Fri 11-Jul-08 21:08:01

YANBU. I could have taken flipping A Level childbirth and passed the practical with A*, only DS had other ideas and it all ended in tears (both kinds). Whereas my friend who didn't read a single book or do a single class and laid on her back for the whole time popped out her DD in a relatively pain free 3 hoursenvy I think I might have strangled that woman, you were very restrained!

beansprout Fri 11-Jul-08 21:08:47

Hit her very hard and when she complains tell her she didn't duck out of the way right. grin

beansprout Fri 11-Jul-08 21:09:25

I've had similar actually - an emergency c-section because I didn't really try hard enough. hmm

dmo Fri 11-Jul-08 21:09:46

i must have been top in the breathing class 1st child took 2hrs 2nd child took 3hrs

did the baby come out?yes then you did it right! stupid women i hate know it all`s

Pruners Fri 11-Jul-08 21:10:24

Message withdrawn

divastrop Fri 11-Jul-08 21:11:45

lol@size of fanjogrin

while its true that breathing etc make a difference,i didnt actually figure that out myself untill baby no.3,and i would say that my 5th labour wasnt very painful,but thats cos dd3 decided to fall out just so her dad could make endless comments about how all women are lying about the pain of childbirthhmm

and listening to the MW is only a good idea if she is actually good at her job usually....

Notalone Fri 11-Jul-08 21:12:14

Well actually there was a ventouse involved but even so.....

She honestly believed she was 100% right and that I was the mad one. She reasoned with the fact that women years ago had to give birth with no intervention and they managed. I had to remind her just how many women died giving birth then too.

Stupid ill informed mare angry

beansprout Fri 11-Jul-08 21:13:39

Does she congratulate herself on having less painful periods too? hmm

Lizzylou Fri 11-Jul-08 21:13:43

What a cheeky bitch.
How you didn't slap her...
I had a 48hr and a 17hr labour, 2 ventouses and sooo many stitches (and a 10 lb 11oz baby) help me, I don't think I could have restrained myself.

Botbot Fri 11-Jul-08 21:14:46

God that would have annoyed me. YANNNNNBU.

abbierhodes Fri 11-Jul-08 21:16:45

During my labour with DS1 (21 hours) my mother commented "if you'd just push a bit harder we could all go home"!!!!

pollywobbledoodle Fri 11-Jul-08 21:18:21

wish i could think of come backs like that....i can only grunt and mumble usually

vixma Fri 11-Jul-08 21:20:11

You shouldnt let her annoy you, shes a nob. When I was in labour it bloody hurt like hell. I did all the breathing and had a wonderful and supportive partner. If she gets to you she wins, and it could be she is arrogant about everything. Let it go and dont let her get to you, she is irrelevent.

Midge25 Fri 11-Jul-08 21:21:35

God, I really wasn't doing it right. 72 hrs, episiotomy and forceps. Really must try harder next time. grin

Flashman Fri 11-Jul-08 21:24:47

Wow this is why i do like this site - I never even knoew it was possible to do labour wrong.

Elasticwoman Fri 11-Jul-08 21:29:21

While "doing it right" can make things easier, some births are going to be difficult whatever you do. And childbirth is very painful for most women if pain relief is not used. I did know one woman who had a "silent labour" (ie no pain at all till last 20 mins) and all the midwives marvelled at it.

toastandbutter Fri 11-Jul-08 21:30:01

She sound arrogant and ignorant. There are all sorts of biological reasons why each woman has a different labour. Hope her next one lasts a week!!! :0

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