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AIBU?

To be disappointed about this good luck card

150 replies

Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 14:47

I left a job in March, and I’ve received the good luck card only this week for some reason. It was a school role I suspect they closed for the summer and found it lying around somewhere, realising they forgot to post it.
It was a large school, with probably close to 100 staff members. I was there for almost a year and a half, granted it’s not that long, but it wasn’t a couple of weeks either.

I remember in my last week at the school in March, they sent out an email to all staff saying that I was leaving and that my card was in reception waiting to be signed. It was the time when all staff and pupils were back at school too.

I’ve opened it and I have a grand total of 8 people who’ve signed it, 3 of them are the office staff.

It’s not the end of the world but I guess I thought a few more people would. I am a quiet and shy person but I was polite to everyone there, I didn’t have any close friends or see any out of work though but I wasn’t part of a department or anything, I was the only one in the school doing that role.

It was nice of the organiser to do that card but at the same time they do it for everybody who leaves. Just feel a bit unpopular but I should get over it I guess.

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 14:48

Even the headteacher and slt didn’t sign it. I actually left as they had put me on an informal support plan, but I was still always polite with them and said hi etc.

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picklemewalnuts · 31/07/2021 14:50

With 100 people there, it's going to take time to build relationships. I'm sorry but you'll barely have registered for most of them.

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Terrazzo · 31/07/2021 14:50

Oh dear. I’d feel down about that too. Sounds like a very big school though and weren’t we in lockdown/home learning until March? So I imagine things were particularly manic.

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Smartiepants79 · 31/07/2021 14:51

March was not a good time in schools! Just back from lockdown etc.. everyone very stressed and busy.
It’s a bit rubbish but I’d not waste energy worrying about it.

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 14:51

I mean they all knew my name, my role and I did talk to various people. It was a cover role so I covered for most teachers at some point, I don’t think they actively disliked me they probably just weren’t that fussed and like you say didn’t really register.

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Didiusfalco · 31/07/2021 14:51

I wouldn’t feel too bad, schools are very busy places and if it was just sat in an office a lot if staff probably wouldn’t have even been near it. At my school we send a child round to everyone with the card. This works well.

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Sillysop92 · 31/07/2021 14:52

You left school at a rather chaotic and busy time (kids just returning and Easter looming plus testing and exam prep), so I guess people probably meant to but forgot. We are using electronic cards for goodbyes at my school, much quicker and no need to go to the school office. Moving around school with Covid guidance is not as straightforward as it has been. I would'nt take it too personally.

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 14:52

Yeah maybe it was that, but I’d signed cards of people who’d left before me and literally couldn’t fit my signature onto the card. I’ll try to tell myself it was just that March was a bad time.

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Wingedharpy · 31/07/2021 14:52

Try not to take it personally OP.
It's more likely the lack of signatures was due to circumstances than anything personal to you.
On the upside - at least they posted it!Smile

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 14:54

Yeah, hopefully it was that.

I could have made better friendships at the school, I just found it very cliquey.
Last month in a school I do supply in I actually saw a girl who used to work at my old school. I said oh hi, nice to see you how are you alright? She just smiled and nodded, and didn’t ask me anything so that was awkward.

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MattHancocksSexTape · 31/07/2021 14:55

My guess - the card was lost before it was passed around to sign. Someone found it and sent without really checking it.

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AngryWhompingWillow · 31/07/2021 14:55

@Marshmallow44 bit miffed/hurt .. However, as pickle said, you won't have registered with many of them, and it may have been hard for the person sorting the card to have got to most people anyway with it being such a busy environment...

No offence intended, but I expect the person who bought the card (and was getting people to sign it) had better things to do with their time than try and find multiple dozens of people to sign your card.

I doubt very much you were disliked, but as you were quiet, many people probably just didn't know you/know of you that much.

Good luck in your next venture. Flowers

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AngryWhompingWillow · 31/07/2021 14:55

Sorry that was meant to say YANBU to be miffed/hurt. (On the first sentence!) No idea what happened!

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 14:57

I mean they said it was left at the main reception at the front which is where staff pass in and out of everyday and 2 emails were sent about me.

Thanks for the reassurance anyway it’s just one of those things I guess. I’ll try to just forget it :)

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Summerdayshaze · 31/07/2021 15:00

Yanbu and I think it’s also really shitty to send it now. You sound like a lovely person. I’m sorry you’re upset.

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Wingedharpy · 31/07/2021 15:02

It's always difficult when you are the new recruit trying to find your fit in an established team - and sometimes, no matter what, you just won't fit.
That's no reflection on you or the team - it's just life.
None of us like and get on with everyone we come across at work - even if it looks as though we do.
You sound like an introvert - as am I, so this stuff is always tricky.
Good luck with your next post.

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Crunchymum · 31/07/2021 15:04

So you were on the emails for your own leaving card?

Didn't you wonder back in March where the card was?

Pity the person who went to the trouble to post it didn't actually check it (they'd have maybe had the sense to see it wasn't signed by many / a good few months had passed) and binned it.

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 15:07

Yeah, I actually emailed in April saying I still hadn’t received the card and they said they would send it that week, still didn’t receive it so I left it. Actually gave up and forgot about it until now.

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Whyarewehardofthinking · 31/07/2021 15:15

This has made me think about our school, and to be honest I can't remember all of the staff that came through us in the past 18 months. It is no reflection on those people who I didn't really see or spend much time with, but more the case of we have had 2 lockdowns, a constant stream of supply staff and Government directives changing every week. We didn't know which way was up most of the time. We had new staff join in September and it took me months to learn names and recognise them as permanent staff because we were in constant flux. To have left in March.... I honestly have no memory of March now as it was such a hectic time.

Please do not take it personally; it would not be meant like that at all.

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 15:17

I miscounted, only 7 signatures !

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MoonlightFancy · 31/07/2021 15:17

I’m sorry you feel like that, I’m sure it was just based on being an extremely busy time at school. They might not have posted it with as few signatures as there were if you hadn’t chased for it, so maybe they felt like they had to? Try not to let it bother you Flowers

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Sunshinedaisymeadowsxx · 31/07/2021 15:21

I’d not take it to heart OP , even though you were there for a year and a half, a year was COVID and how much was school shut for that? I think that time in any job is different —- people are so concerned about their own health they these that they miss the general things that go own.

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Winemewhynot · 31/07/2021 15:23

In the kindest possible way, you say yourself you didn’t make connections or friendships so people probably didn’t care enough to seek out the card and sign it. Just forget about it.

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Marshmallow44 · 31/07/2021 15:24

Just seeing others’ cards filled to the brim, massive leaving parties (outside of work) etc.

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Sunshinedaisymeadowsxx · 31/07/2021 15:30

If you had been in the position for years I could totally understand but I’d not worry or focus about it. I’d put your concentration into your new job and making connections etc thereb

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