To ask what's the rudest thing a stranger has done to you?

(705 Posts)
YoungScrappyHungry Tue 08-Dec-20 14:48:04

Inspired by the lovely thread about kindest thing strangers have done for you, and also a chance for me to share this horror.

When I was 19, I worked on the tills at a supermarket in my holidays from university.

A woman I was serving was staring at me, trying to get my attention as I scanned her stuff. I looked up at her and smiled. She said, in still the most condescending tone I've ever heard:

'Don't you wish you'd studied now?'

I was so floored and ashamed, I didn't say a thing back and just carried on scanning her things. Fact was I was actually at university, but even if I hadn't been....aghh!....still gets me.

What are yours?

OP’s posts: |
FluffyPJs Tue 08-Dec-20 15:46:48

I was recovering in hospital after a miscarriage. My cystic acne had flared up due to the pregnancy hormones and my face was quite bad. When offered a cup of tea, which I don't drink, I accepted so I could give it to my husband. He always had 3 sugars so I asked for 3. The nurse snapped at me, very nastily, no wonder your skin is so bad with all that sugar. I was devastated. We did put in a complaint but the damage was already done.

hansgrueber Tue 08-Dec-20 15:48:01

Not uncommon that! My daughter was serving behind a bar and a few German girls were talking about her, the pub, the country, nothing flattering, they were totally floored when my daughter turned round and spoke to them, in perfect, colloquial German, it being a part of her degree and she'd studied in Germany.

flaviaritt Tue 08-Dec-20 15:48:40

I was getting off a train and someone was getting on. I was holding something (I think a parcel) and this man grabbed it and used it to move me out of his way so he could board first.

Inpersuitofhappiness Tue 08-Dec-20 16:04:22

its probably not even the worst thing, but it still sticks in my craw now, about 8 years ago my husband had a day off work, he had been working days and weekends flat out for about 8 weeks, so this was quite special, we decided the night before we would have a day at the beach whilst it was still warm.
just off from the beach there was an old antique shop, which he always looked in as a child, and was looking at this small tool, only about £15 or so, but this old man came past and sneered, to buy that youd need to get a job, we cant pay for everything for you.

i was so embarassed that he made some sort of assumption, then angry that he felt it was ok to speak to anyone that way. i still cant understand why he would have thought that. maybe it was because we were fairly young with a child? maybe it was because i was fat? maybe we seemed like Jk types? maybe his hair was due a cut? maybe it was because we were there on a week day? no bloody idea.

EvelynSalt Tue 08-Dec-20 16:12:33

I used to work overseas and on many occasions women in the office would say "oh Evelyn, you're so fat now", "Evelyn, you look very old now", "You looked much better before you cut your hair" etc etc. It was, I'm pretty sure, cultural as they were lovely to me in general. But it took me a while to develop a thick skin about it!

ikltownofboothlehem Tue 08-Dec-20 16:13:01

I'd not long had DS and was out at the local shopping centre with him. A chap sat down next to me & said I should be ashamed of myself, having a child so young & expecting 'him' to keep me on the state.

For once I wasn't floored add told him I was
A) married
B) on maternity leave from a well paid job
C) was 36

Then he had a go at me for being rude. I was much ruder back.


FridayNightAtTheBronze Tue 08-Dec-20 16:15:48

This was more a rude thing done to my daughter, but it still affected me hugely.

My daughter was 3 at the time, and we were watching my son at his swimming lesson. An older lady (potentially another students grandmother) was sitting opposite, and had been staring at my daughter for a bit. She then walked over, grasped her by the chin and said "What's wrong with her face?".

My daughter was born with a cleft lip and palate, and although she has had 4 surgeries it is still fairly obvious.

I was so shocked that I froze and said nothing. I pulled my daughter away from her, and she walked away and I have always felt ashamed that I didn't have the courage to say something at the time. But it was so unexpected and awful.

I don't think my daughter remembers (I hope!) but I'll never forget it.

People can be cruel.

Coldilox Tue 08-Dec-20 16:21:36

Walking along the street holding hands with my then girlfriend (now wife), man walking in other direction spits in my face as he passes me.

Have had worse at work (police, wasn’t at the time) but that is the worst I’ve had completely apropos of nothing.

Was shocked and upset at the time. Would react very differently now. Bigoted twat.

Gobbycop Tue 08-Dec-20 16:22:39

Tried to stab me.

DillonPanthersTexas Tue 08-Dec-20 16:25:26

When I was a student I worked as a part time estate agent and while on one viewing where the seller was actually in the house the man doing the viewing did an enormous 12 second fart that must have spanned about 3 octaves. His wife did not bat an eyelid and I was left with my jaw dropped wondering what I had just witnessed. Just before leaving he dropped his guts again before strolling down the path. I was mortified.

YoungScrappyHungry Tue 08-Dec-20 16:30:18

@Coldilox I'm police too. Do you think he recognised you from a job or are you gay? What a dick either way.

OP’s posts: |
GreenlandTheMovie Tue 08-Dec-20 16:30:46

When I was driving once, I realised I'd forgotten something and decided to execute a turn in the road, using a large laybye on the other side. I saw a woman walking along the pavement next to the laybye so out of politeness, I waited until she moved along a bit further to finish turning, so she didn't feel my car was getting too close to her or anything.

For reasons that I still can't fathom to this day, she turned, fixed me with a gimlet stare and then banged on my car bonnet, shouting something very angry and unintelligible at me. I got out the car, stunned, to see what was wrong, to be met with more "Thats a disgrace, what do you think you're doing, you shouldn't do that" type remarks. She literally just stood and raged at me for no reason at all. She went on and on so eventually I stood up to her and if she thought something serious had occurred, she should take my registration and report me to the police. When I mentioned the police, she came to her senses and walked off.

Still can't understand what set her off!

frolicmum Tue 08-Dec-20 16:31:36

@FridayNightAtTheBronze that I cannot believe that woman said this to your daughter or you. oh I wish I had been there. If you didn't I have the words, I would have had the words for you and that woman would have never forgot me angry (completely understand why you didn't have the words in that very moment) x

WellTidy Tue 08-Dec-20 16:31:42

I was 17, doing a levels, applying for university. Worked every Saturday on the checkout at Tesco. I was chug free d to have that job as it paid so well, relative to the waitressing that my friends were doing, and there was always loads of overtime on offer for school holidays.

Family came through my checkout with a little boy in the seat part of the trolley. Real cutie, I chatted to him, he was fascinated with the scanner, a real delight and such a bright button. As they were paying, he said to his mum ‘I want to do that when I’m a grown up’ indicating at me. Mum said ‘oh, we hope you’ll do something better than this’ and laughed and laughed. The dad was mortified, tried to engage with me and gloss over it.

I was so embarrassed. Didn’t say anything and just went bright red.

Lsquiggles Tue 08-Dec-20 16:32:05

@fridaynightatthebronze people can be terribly cruel, I'm not surprised you froze when faced with such a comment out of the blue!

Butchyrestingface Tue 08-Dec-20 16:36:55

In a bar, tried to rest their pint on my head with the immortal words, "Oh sorry, I thought you were a table."

I am rather short. And it left me with a good story to tell.

Purplehatsandflowers Tue 08-Dec-20 16:37:06

I was walking down wide stairs very slowly as I have a very bad back. There was plenty of room to pass me on the side but a man physically pushed me out the way (and I nearly fell) and told me to get the fuck out of the way.

One day we were trying to take a photo outside a church and i was holidng DS1 who was about 2 I think. The sun was in his eyes and he was moving around and whining about it. A passerby looked at us, sneered and said very loudly; 'What on EARTH is wrong with that child? Is it autistic or something?'

(As it turned out, yes. )

TooExtraImmatureCheddar Tue 08-Dec-20 16:39:45

I was walking along the street with some friends on a night out when I was mid-20s. There was a girl coming the other way with 2 guys, and as she came level with me she just reached out and slapped me in the face, hard. I had never seen her before in my life! I turned round and yelled “what do you think you’re playing at?” and she said she was just happy slapping. I mean, wtf? My friends weighed in and the blokes she was with looked really embarrassed and started backing off - I think she did it to impress them (she looked about 18) but they were so not impressed.

frolicmum Tue 08-Dec-20 16:40:45

My son is growing up bilingual, German and English, we were in the park and I was speaking to my son and a man passed by. The man turned around and shouted at me that in this country (I live in England), I should speak English, that I'm scum and I should go back to where I came from. It really shook me and I now speak a lot less German with my child in public as it's scarred me.

Rhayader Tue 08-Dec-20 16:41:43

I look quite a bit younger than I am. Pregnant with DD1 and the midwife doing my booking in appointment asked me if I knew who the dad was! I said “hopefully my husband” in a jokey way and she apologised saying she thought I was a lot younger. But seriously.. wtf? Better to ask “what kind of support do you have?”

Whattheactual20201 Tue 08-Dec-20 16:44:31

When my DS started primary school one of the mums thought I was his au pair when I corrected her she responded wow did you have him when you were still in the womb 😳🤣

DragonforaMIL Tue 08-Dec-20 16:48:30

Working over the summer holiday from Uni in a local pub, a man at the bar pointed to us bar staff said to his teen son "and this is why you need to stay at college, otherwise you'll end up like them". I gleefully replied which one of us, the one doing a Masters in law, or the one doing a PhD? He left quite quickly grin

Purplehatsandflowers Tue 08-Dec-20 16:48:31


When my DS started primary school one of the mums thought I was his au pair when I corrected her she responded wow did you have him when you were still in the womb 😳🤣

One of the mums of a girl in DSs class I thought was the au pair. She is incredibly young looking. Turns out she is not too much younger than me (I am 48) and she was blessed with INCREDIBLE genes.

(not jealous ) grin

zaphodbeeble Tue 08-Dec-20 16:49:26

‘Imagine having to be a waitress, it’s so demeaning’, I was waiting on in a posh hotel whilst doing my A levels and had an offer to study History at Cambridge

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