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To have only just told him now?

(87 Posts)
inthedarkx Sun 05-Jul-20 21:37:04

My 14 year old daughter started her period for the first time on Friday. She was actually quite upset about it, scared and teary. I reassured her, sent her for a bath and made sure she had her supply of pads at the ready. And that was that. 3rd day in now and she's getting used to it but she didn't text her dad to tell him which was her choice as she feels a bit embarrassed but i told her there is no need to be( me and him are separated)
Anyway I text her dad myself tonight just so he's aware she has started because if she goes to his flat to stay he needs to know in case she needs a supplies ect. He text me back saying 'only just telling me how' I said it's only the 3rd day I've not left it months before telling him. He replies 'fuck off with your high moral shit face idiotic self'
What ever that means 🤷🏻‍♀️
Is he justified that I told him on day 3 and not from the beginning ?
He's now blocked me on all communication 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP’s posts: |
Lookatthat Sun 05-Jul-20 21:38:42

He sounds awful. You did nothing wrong, and were courteous to tell him!

MinesAPintOfTea Sun 05-Jul-20 21:38:52

Enjoy your peace and quiet as he can't contact you while blocked.

ttigerlilly Sun 05-Jul-20 21:39:35

What an immature response. You aren't being unreasonable in not telling him immediately considering your daughter didn't want to tell him straight away either.
Hope she is ok, the first period is horrible!thanks

ttigerlilly Sun 05-Jul-20 21:39:46

What an immature response. You aren't being unreasonable in not telling him immediately considering your daughter didn't want to tell him straight away either.
Hope she is ok, the first period is horrible!thanks

Clevererthanyou Sun 05-Jul-20 21:41:38

Was this overreaction typical of him when you were still together op? You’ve done nothing wrong. Your teenage daughter started her period, she doesn’t require urgent medical attention and it isn’t a big deal.

user187428496 Sun 05-Jul-20 21:43:21

Presumably this is why you are separated?

Does your daughter know you told him?

Itisbetter Sun 05-Jul-20 21:45:42

Did you ask her if you could share that?

PerditaProvokesEnmity Sun 05-Jul-20 21:46:13

You told him something moderately important about your shared daughter, and he made it all about him?

People can be so disappointing sometimes ...

toomanyplants Sun 05-Jul-20 21:47:36

Immature prick.
Your priority was your daughter, not him.

Qwicks Sun 05-Jul-20 21:51:16

Block him right back! He sounds like the type to unblock you just long enough to send you another barrage of abuse. Make sure it doesn't connect.

Sunnydayshereatlast Sun 05-Jul-20 21:52:01

Not sure I would have told him..
Wasn't your business to tell.

Michaelbaubles Sun 05-Jul-20 21:53:54

Of course you weren’t wrong. She’s not 6 and losing her first teeth - it’s a private matter which she’s clearly fairly self-conscious about. I’m not sure dads who live in the same houses always know when their daughters start their periods (or would even want to know!).

Proudboomer Sun 05-Jul-20 21:56:22

It was not for you to decide if and when to tell her dad.

Does your daughter know that you have taken it upon yourself to inform him?

theproblemwitheyes Sun 05-Jul-20 21:59:06

Why did you tell him at all!? It's up to her to let him know as and when she wants to.

Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches Sun 05-Jul-20 21:59:24

He sounds ridiculous! What a prat (and worse!)

I would block him too. Does she have her own phone so she can communicate with you if and when she goes there?

TARSCOUT Sun 05-Jul-20 22:02:02

God, do dad's now really want to know this information? What a fuss about nothing.

FelicityPike Sun 05-Jul-20 22:03:00

I wouldn’t have told him.
It’s your daughter’s place to share personal information like that.

letmethinkaboutitfornow Sun 05-Jul-20 22:04:42

He doesn’t sound a nice person.
But, I don’t think you should have told him.
(14 is very late for a first period, she might have been shy about it, but should have been her choice)

OzziePopPop Sun 05-Jul-20 22:06:03

Translated he’s saying ‘I’m a moron, please ignore me’.


inthedarkx Sun 05-Jul-20 22:06:02

She knows I told him. If I didn't tell him and he found out months down the line he would give me a load of abuse for telling him straight away. And he would probably be spiteful towards me after that by keeping something even more important from me. He's always been like this

OP’s posts: |
wineandroses1 Sun 05-Jul-20 22:08:09

What a twat. Good job he’s your Ex.

ContessaferJones Sun 05-Jul-20 22:09:13

I read OPs posts as saying that the DD was embarrassed to tell her dad herself (understandably - it's the sort of thing I'd have rather died than say to mine) but didn't mind her mum letting him know (or at least accepted it as a necessity).

inthedarkx Sun 05-Jul-20 22:10:28

@ContessaferJones that's right 😊

OP’s posts: |
LouiseTrees Sun 05-Jul-20 22:11:16

I think you tell him it wasn’t my decision. Your daughter was embarrassed and she didn’t want me to tell you but I thought I should so you could try and be a better father than you were a partner.

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