I haven’t eaten meat since the start of 2017, and then gave up fish too start of 2019, I’d say I’m now about 85% vegan. DP eats and always has eaten meat, I would prefer it if he didn’t (mainly for ease!) but have no personal problem with him or anyone else eating meat if that’s what they choose, and unless questioned on it am not typically a preacher!
We have brought our 4.5yo son up eating meat, I have bought and cooked meat for him as normal his whole life, but by default, he’s also eaten a lot of vegetarian and vegan meals/snacks too. Around a year ago he started asking me why I didn’t eat meat, I told him I didn’t like the idea of eating animals (he’s an inquisitive child and I always try to be honest when answering his questions), but that it’s up to him if he eats meat or not and when he’s older he can make the decision for himself if he so chooses. He’s very switched on and has always had a fascination with anything vegetarian or vegan (probably more just the word than anything else) but has previously said things like “I like veggie stuff, but I like meat too like Daddy, I like both” which I’ve told him is completely fine and he’s never seemed too influenced to stop eating meat which is what I’ve always tried hard not to do either way (other than give him my own opinion on why I don’t eat it when he’s asked). I’ve never wanted to force my views on him as he’s his own person and I believe he can make up his own mind.
Now, he has suddenly become adamant he doesn’t want to eat meat. When I ask why he says “I thought about all the animals and I don’t want to eat them” which has obviously come from my answer, but it’s very out of the blue. I expected he may say this at some point but didn’t think he would be this young. DP keeps cooking him and giving him meat as if he is refusing to take him seriously as he’s so young, but DS immediately asks “is this meat?” (as we sometimes eat quorn/other mock meats etc) and if it is he has started becoming quite upset when he is told it is and refusing to eat it. (DP has on occasion told him something is veggie when it’s not just to get him to eat it which I don’t agree with and have told him not to lie to him about what he’s eating). I’ve reassured him there’s nothing to feel guilty about if he wants to eat it and it’s up to him and nobody else but he’s adamant he doesn’t eat meat anymore. He’s also become extremely clingy and favourable to me during lockdown so realise he may just be copying me because of this.
I’d like to follow his lead on this, even if it just a phase. I never enjoyed meat as a child but in a family of meat eaters being vegetarian wasn’t something I even knew of, and it was “eat what you’re given”. If DS really is feeling this way I wouldn’t like to force him to eat something he doesn’t want to. I think DP and his family, and my family too will all think this is my doing and think negatively about it, but if DS was to ask me to eat meat then I’d give it to him. I’ve obviously inadvertently influenced him but I don’t think this is necessarily a bad thing! I’m quite conscious of protein rich veggie foods and thankfully DS loves his vegetables too so I’m going to try hard to make sure he is getting all he needs.
Any tips on veggie kids or similar situations with a mix of meat eating/veggie households would be great!
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AIBU?
To take my 4yo’s lead on him wanting to be vegetarian?
35 replies
Tanline20 · 30/05/2020 07:26
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
57 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
19%
You are NOT being unreasonable
81%
RiverRover ·
30/05/2020 08:30
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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request
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