I have twins who are nearly 6 with my ex husband. We have a great coparenting relantionship and are also great friends. We married very young, marriage lasted 7 years and we split ambically. Fast forward 3 years I got remarried, new husband is a great guy and an awesome step dad. Has no kids of his own and always stated that he didn't want any kids and was happy to raise my girls with me and was content with being their step dad. He spends everyday with them and has a very involved role with them. But recently he bought up the topic of having a child with me.
I really feel like I don't want anymore children. For a few reasons. Firstly I feel like it will complicate my twins life, right now they have it good with 3 loving parents, and my husband is happy to support us in the way in which we want to raise our children however has specifically said if we had a kid he would do things differently, and in my opinion that would never work, as you can't have a household where 3 kids are being raised differently. We come from two different cultures and have worked hard to come to a middle ground on many differences, which has been a working progress but I think we have done very well. However I see if we had our own child together, this could be very complicated.
Also for myself, I do get times when I'm broody but generally my mindset is I have two healthy children who are becoming more independant. I would rather use my present and future finances to give them a great life, adding another just doesn't seem financially the best route to take and also will take me straight back to the pregnancy phase then breastfeeding etc, after having twins and going through all of that (it was a joy and I loved it but hard work) - I just couldn't imagine starting from the beginning again.
I know he doesn't have kids of his own but he always said before we married and the first few years he didn't want any and I made it clear that I didn't think I would want anymore either.
Am I being unreasonable?
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To not want anymore children?
90 replies
Curious200 · 17/05/2020 15:32
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
174 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
5%
You are NOT being unreasonable
95%
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