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AIBU?

That dh shouldn’t go on about smells

82 replies

sugarloafdaffodil · 12/11/2019 09:20

Dh is a bit of a smell police, particularly as regards food.

Anything that ‘smells’ is commented on. I gave the kids a salmon sandwich at the weekend and he said ‘ugh, what have they eaten, fish? I can smell it on them.’

God forbid if there’s curry, garlic, onion or anything.

It makes me paranoid and I think the kids will be too (they are 3 and 1 so a bit young to notice yet.)

Or AIBU?

OP posts:
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MiniCooperLover · 12/11/2019 09:22

No, YANBU, that's just rude. I hate it when people make comments like that. Tell him to shut up, he's going to give the kids a complex with regards their food.

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Bluntness100 · 12/11/2019 09:25

He may just he super sensitive to smells. I am. For example if my husband has a glass of wine, or a beer, I can actually smell it from the other side of the room. I seem to be able to smell things well before others can.

Tell him not to comment, as you're worried it will give a complex, and the smells aren't bad, but just normal. However also try to understand it from his perspective, that these to him are unpleasant smells so he's not being malicious.

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GettingABitDesperateNow · 12/11/2019 09:27

Unless he kids are eating their lunch in an office or about to go on a date then Yanbu!

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Thestrangestthing · 12/11/2019 09:29

I'm like this with smells, make me feel sick. Can't stand anyone cooking after 8pm because it makes me feel so ill. I never comment on it to people though, accept dp, no one else is trying to kiss me though.

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rwalker · 12/11/2019 09:34

Sorry i'm with him some people are just sensitive to this .The other day a colleague had a spicy lunch I couldn't talk to them as it starting to make me heave .
It's just food with me I have worked for utility companies in peoples houses utter filth dog shit over flowing cat litter trays and general dirt whilst not pleasent doesn't have the same effect as food smells.

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Antigon · 12/11/2019 09:34

YANBU. Even if I would eat an orange, DH would say it 'stinks'.

I hate that word 'stinks' about normal food smells Angry

I tell him clearly to please do not make comments about my food, it's rude and I don't like it. If that doesn't work then you have a problem OP, because it means he does not give a shit who he upsets.

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Antigon · 12/11/2019 09:36

Sorry i'm with him some people are just sensitive to this

It's different in an office, where people should be considerate about heating up fishy/cheesy dishes.

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Elbeagle · 12/11/2019 09:37

I am very very sensitive to smells. I wouldn’t comment on it though, that’s just rude.

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ReanimatedSGB · 12/11/2019 09:57

If he is one of these people who is hyper-sensitive to smell, fair enough but he doesn't need to whine and moan and upset the rest of you. He can just leave the room if a smell is bothering him. Perhaps have a discussion with him about using air fresheners or something to clear the air after the rest of you have cooked/eaten something spicy/fishy/garlicky.

But don't put yourself and DC on a restricted diet just to pander to him. It won't be good for them and, if he's actually an attention-seeking prick, he will find something else to harass the rests of you about.

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lottiegarbanzo · 12/11/2019 09:57

Lots of people are sensitive to smells. Fish really, really smells.

But, talking in a derogatory way about food you've taken the trouble to prepare is very rude.

Your DH needs to learn to communicate politely.

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speakout · 12/11/2019 09:58

It's one thing being sensitive to smells and another to comment.

I too an very sensitive to smells, I can tell waht people have been recently eating.
I wouldn't dream of saying anything though- that's just rude and offensive.

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GrumpyHoonMain · 12/11/2019 09:59

It’s because of Stupid comments like that that many kids stop eating proper food. You do need to crack down on your DH.

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Shoxfordian · 12/11/2019 10:02

He shouldn't be so rude
Has he always been like this?

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CharityConundrum · 12/11/2019 10:04

I'm pretty sensitive to smells, having developed a really keen nose when pregnant, but it's my issue to deal with. The sensitivity isn't the problem, inflicting his discomfort on everyone else definitely is, especially when it does nothing to mitigate his experience anyway.

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SeaToSki · 12/11/2019 10:06

If it really bothers him, fair enough; but its just rude to whine on about it.

One thing I used to do when morning sickness was driving me demented (mostly driven by my perception of unpleasant smells) was to put some essential oils on a tissue and keep it in my pocket. At the first hint of a smell I would ‘blow my nose’ and replace said smell with a nose full of orange, lemon or mint. Could he try this?

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Amicompletelyinsane · 12/11/2019 10:08

Oh I never think about food smells. Starting to feel guilty about the number of curries I eat at work now 😬

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bobstersmum · 12/11/2019 10:09

My dh hates tuna and corned beef. The dc love them as I do. If they are eating a tuna sandwich dh will say ewwwww that stinks! It annoys me because things like that can put kids off eating things.

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Toporama · 12/11/2019 10:12

Yeah, he's being very rude. People eat food. Lots of foods have a smell. Get over it.

How on earth does he manage in everyday life? Does he tell work colleaues, shop assistants, train passengers that they reek of fish? No, of course he doesn't, because he knows it's rude and they would be angry with him. He just thinks he can insult his wife and kids whenever he wants. What a lovely person.

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Beautiful3 · 12/11/2019 10:12

Uugh my father and sister have sensitive noses. They can smell EVERYTHING! Drives me crazy! I ignore it half the time.. unless its gas!

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MarianaMoatedGrange · 12/11/2019 10:17

I'm sensitive to food smells too. But I'm not a dick about it. A pp made a good point about your DC stopping eating good food because of your DH's issues. Point that out to him.

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Zaphodsotherhead · 12/11/2019 10:19

He's being quite childish, really. Yes, some food smells stronger than others, but does he have to vocalise every thought that goes through his head?

Does he do this with other things?

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Betterversionofme · 12/11/2019 10:21

Kids notice everything. They just don't think it's weird. It's their world. Later they might think other kids are weird when they will get upset after your children will comment on 'smells' from their lunches.
Your DH is rude. Picked chilly garlic is amazing. You must try. Two jars as a snack is just right amount.

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sugarloafdaffodil · 12/11/2019 10:21

Well it was a ready made salmon sandwich from m and s tbf Grin

‘Sensitive’ Grin

OP posts:
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Cucuclown99999 · 12/11/2019 10:21

My mum is exactly like this.
Yeah fine she’s sensitive to smells but she’s so rude about it.
Ewww what is that smell it stinks.
Me in the kitchen cooking our dinner and fuming Angry
Fine don’t eat it.
I won’t.
She eats it
Mmmm that’s actually really nice Hmm

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toycar · 12/11/2019 10:24

Its rude. There are plenty of things my family/ work colleagues eat that I find yucky like tinned sardines in sauces or really onion smells on peoples clothes/hair from the previous night's cooking but i don't say anything! As for close family, i'd say something more subtle and less confrontational!!

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