No Janet you can’t OWN running

[Janetsadick]

It’s not “your” hobby.

Nobody is stealing your thunder by taking up running.

If you faux roll your eyes and mention it again I’m going to throw a fucking stapler at your head

AIBU?

[BigSandyBalls2015]

Janet is indeed a dick ..... chuck that stapler

[Greyponcho]

[Greyponcho]

(It’ll give her something to run from )

[Janetsadick]

“God I can’t have anything to myself” (tinkle tinkle tinkle)

It’s RUNNING. We’ve literally been doing it for 1000s of years. It’s not a Tuesday night bongo class

[RestingGrinchFace]

I hope that Janet is at least good at running-probably not though. Maybe she milk like to take up dodge stapler, like dodge ball but with staplers.

[Namechangetempissue]

Janet would make me want to take up competitive marathon running just to piss on her bonfire

[TheQueenOfWands]

Janet's right.

She invented running. It's on wikipedia. Poor woman should had it patented.

[DJBaggySmalls]

I already put her stapler in jelly

[yawning801]

Here you go OP, have my stapler! You can also have a packet of Post-Its and a staple remover while you're at it! I can never make that thing work - what even is the point of it?

MAJORLY pisses me off when people say "You can't do yoga - I do yoga!"

[DingDongDenny]

Well if Janet now 'owns running' (she's welcome to it) I'm claiming cycling. Off your bikes everyone - cycling is mine!

[Xtrabroken]

[Janetsadick]

I need to go home. I think this thread is proof of that.

I might fucking RUN out of the office. Slow mo run out the door

[OstentatiousWanking]

0

[FlamingGusset]

YANBU.

Get fucked, Janet.

[DandelionAndBedrock]

FFS. Has someone claimed my bongo night too?

You can borrow my wall stapler, but you must bring it back.

[Fekko]

If Janet decides to identify as the originator of the activity of running, they we ought to jolly well bow down to his belief system.

[MoistCantaloupe]

Tell Janet you won't run.

THEN, secretly train so Janet doesn't know, and sign up for the local charity 10k run. Janet has her eyes on winning gold for that, and when the big day comes, she is pumped and ready to go. Her finish line is in sight, but what she hadn't prepared for is YOU, steaming up the inside. With your secret training in place, you beat her at the last moment!

I have no idea if anywhere has a local charity 10k run, but I like the thought of this.

[BrokenBattleDroid]

Janet is feeling insecure. Running was her thing and now Other People are doing it, possibly better than her, she isn't feeling quite so special.

But Janet is silly and should be ignored.

[Undercoverbanana]

I own running. And I am faster than Janet.

[toomuchtooold]

Wait till January and she'll be claiming the gym's her sole domain as well. "All these new people, they'll be here for 5 weeks and then never come back ever again. Still all to the good, their gym subs help keep it open for the serious gym bunnies like me!"

Yeah fuck off Janet.

[Doodlebug5]

I put my name on my stapler at work in tippex. It’s now my stapler and mine only.
Maybe she ought to put her name on running in tippex too?

[GertrudeCB]

It's always fucking Janet

[PeekabooPoo]

The only logical way to deal with Janet is to beat her at it so she'll have to give it up and hand the running rights to you.

So if she does a sponsored 5k make sure you follow her round the office with a sponsorship form for a half marathon.

[Yeahsureokay]

I own binge watching on Netflix. You can't have that Janet. 🖕🏻

[DonnyAndVladSittingInATree]

Tell Janet she doesn’t own running, she’s barely in sight of jogging