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wedding etiquette

(65 Posts)
Sunshinegirls Mon 05-Jun-17 14:46:31

I am going to a wedding in a few weeks and have bought a black dress, my mother is horrified and has informed me that you shouldn't wear black to a wedding as much as you shouldn't wear white. I've never heard of this. Is it a thing? hmm

Iwasjustabouttosaythat Mon 05-Jun-17 14:48:18

It's very much a thing. Black is for funerals. Wearing black to a wedding is like saying you're unhappy about the marriage.

puddingpen Mon 05-Jun-17 14:49:03

Yeah, you're not supposed to wear black. Sorry.

Shoxfordian Mon 05-Jun-17 14:50:40

I think you can wear black if you accessorize with some colours and wear a colourful hat

HeyCat Mon 05-Jun-17 14:51:04

It's a very well known tradition, but not everybody cares about it.

Personally I doubt I'd have noticed or cared if any of the guests were in black, but I know a friend of mine was very offended by a guest wearing a black dress with pink flowers on.

troodiedoo Mon 05-Jun-17 14:51:35

It is a thing but not as much as the not wearing white thing. If it's a fancy style and you accessorise with a bit of colour it'll be fine smile

Run4Fun Mon 05-Jun-17 14:51:56

No White/Cream/Black for weddings
Agree black is for funeral

Pinkheart5919 Mon 05-Jun-17 14:52:21

I think you can do black BUT it depends on the dress? And what accessories? ( you need bright shoes/bag etc)

I wouldn't wear black myself to a wedding as it does scream funeral, black just isn't a happy colour and a wedding should be a happy day

HeyCat Mon 05-Jun-17 14:53:05

So unless you know the bride very very well and are sure they'll be ok with it, you shouldn't wear black.

Tootootootoo Mon 05-Jun-17 14:53:21

Entirely black? I didn't think it was a 'thing' any more, but easy to dress up with coloured accessories.

Bosabosa Mon 05-Jun-17 14:53:38

Lots of colourful accessories and you'll be fine x

HardplaceandRock Mon 05-Jun-17 14:55:12

My mother in law wore entirely black to my wedding........am sure she did it as a statement of her unhappiness about the marriage (me taking her little boy away from her hmm) didn't bother me then and 20 years on it still doesn't

DrSpin Mon 05-Jun-17 14:55:35

No don't wear black! Unless you are horrifically sad about the wedding that is?

fuckwitery Mon 05-Jun-17 14:55:44

It's very much a thing, traditionally. Some brides would very upset. But some. It so fussed these days. If you know her well just ask.

HundredMilesAnHour Mon 05-Jun-17 14:55:52

Your DM is correct. No black, no white, no cream and no green (supposed to be unlucky!)

29Palms Mon 05-Jun-17 14:56:36

IMO there's a big difference between wearing unrelieved black, and wearing a black dress with brightly coloured accessories.

Dress it up with hat, shawl/stole/scarf, shoes, bag, maybe some bold jewellery, all in a vibrant colour like bright pink, yellow or red, and it won't look in the least funereal.

Sunshinegirls Mon 05-Jun-17 14:57:17

Hmmmm shit! I still have time to buy another, it is completely black so I suppose might raise an eyebrow or two. Bit gutted as it took me ages to find a dress that didn't make me look like a overstuffed cushion. blush

Mamabear14 Mon 05-Jun-17 14:58:01

My mum is buying a black dress for my wedding. I helped her pick it. She likes my DP fine, it's just that she literally never wears any other colour. It doesn't bother me at all.

Mrsglitterfairy Mon 05-Jun-17 14:58:32

I also agree, you shouldn't wear fully black to a wedding. Maybe the black dress with some bright heels, shrug, fascinator and jewellery at a push if you can't sort another dress

thecolonelbumminganugget Mon 05-Jun-17 14:58:42

Picture of dress please

(For no other reason than I'm nosey grin )

Mamabear14 Mon 05-Jun-17 14:59:39

This is what she's going to wear.

Run4Fun Mon 05-Jun-17 15:01:18

I have never heard about green at weddings. Just don't dress like a bridesmaid or a bride or someone in mourning grin

thecolonelbumminganugget Mon 05-Jun-17 15:04:39

Nice dress! I'm getting married in a few weeks and my mum is wearing a cream and black dress, her outfit is lovely, I helped her pick it. I think it depends how well you know the couple. If you know they are not going to give a monkey's then go for it, if you don't know them well enough to call it then I'd steer clear.

sweetbitter Mon 05-Jun-17 15:05:08

The issue of wearing a black dress to a wedding was extensively debated on this thread a few weeks back, you might want to read for opinions:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2934141-that-you-don-t-ask-guests-to-change-their-wedding-outfit?

Personally I think anyone would be mad to care about you wearing black unless there was some reason to think you were deliberately doing it as a statement of disapproval (which again I would never have thought possible until I read on aforementioned thread that some people would take it that way)

Funnyface1 Mon 05-Jun-17 15:05:11

Were you going to put any other colours to it? A jacket or a pashmina might change it.

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