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Aibu to think it's a bit rubbish to use "9.30 is so early!" As an excuse / complaint?

(185 Posts)
Cathycomehome Sat 17-Nov-12 21:21:15

Ds2 is to be Christened on Sunday. Some people who are distant, duty invites like cousins, have said it's too early as they are far away, and that's fine. But loads of other people, who are very local have said "9.30?!?! Seriously?? Well we'll try...." It's pissing me off.

fuckwittery Sat 17-Nov-12 21:48:34

We go to 9.30am mass every Sunday morning along with a very large proportion of the families we know from school. It's not that early especially for a one -off. I am afraid that the people you invited aren't that bothered about the "church" bit if they can't be bothered to go (if local), perhaps they thought you might just say, well come along for the party afterwards. Possibly a bit much if you have to drive an hour.

Cathycomehome Sat 17-Nov-12 21:50:04

I don't mind the nos as much as the yeses with complaining or the we'll come afterwards lot, tbh.

RevoltingPeasant Sat 17-Nov-12 21:51:54

Erm, wow. At the risk of sounding smuggety-smug-smug, Saturdays are normally our one lie-in - today, as a one-off, DH was going to London on a 6.55am train, so I dropped him at the station and went swimming as the pool is just near - in the water by 7.10am.

If I can do that just because I fancy a swim, I'm sure people who care about you can do that for a christening. Hell, today I would've been able to go swimming before your christening!

I don't know, if people have 2yo triplets or something it might be undoable, but for most people, it just sounds lazy!

HoratiaWinwood Sat 17-Nov-12 21:52:21

Just checking - are they all local? We have been to baptisms hundreds of miles away. When you aren't leaving from your own home it is more tricky and slower.

Cathycomehome Sat 17-Nov-12 21:56:37

I don't mind at all the two who have said no because distance plus time is too much. I mind the people who live five minutes walk away!

BackforGood Sat 17-Nov-12 21:57:41

If I were invited, I'd think Yikes, that's a bit early!, but wouldn't dream of saying that to the host (except perhaps in jest if it came up in conversation), but I'd certainly reply with thanks and just set my alarm earlier than I normally would for my service. Certainly wouldn't dither about if I were going to go or not, and wouldn't dream of being so rude as to expect to attend the drinks/nibbles/ afterwards if I'd not gone to the actualy christening shock

bedmonster Sat 17-Nov-12 21:58:42

Fuck 'em. Seriously? 9.30 isn't early for a special occasion. I get 2 DC to school for 8.30 with a baby in tow. Many people do the same. Many more people do it much earlier than that. If people want to come and celebrate your DSs day then they should just get on with, but I think it's Very rude to comment on the time and would just tell them not to bother coming.
(Obviously this applies only to your local guests. And I am not a church goer but would make the effort for a Christening).

TheDetective Sat 17-Nov-12 22:03:09

I hate Christenings and the like, so I'd be glad of a reason excuse to get out of it. 9.30am on a Sunday sounds like my idea of hell on earth. Sorry grin. But I'd just say I was working or something. It is early - I mean what are you doing for food after? Breakfast??! Bacon butties all round?!

DP's sister has her boys christening tomorrow. I conveniently arranged my hospital appointment during the middle of the service. Well I am 42 weeks pregnant and I am putting the baby before her wish for me to attend. I did tell her this could happen - when she booked it 3 months ago. But she didn't listen...

Sorry, that sounds awful. I'm not religious in the slightest, and hate family do's antisocial caaaaaw.

I still can't believe she arranged it right round the time I was due to have the baby anyway, seeing as she wanted DP to be a godparent - which he declined as he didn't know if he would be able to attend, given that it was more important to be there for me and our baby. And I have a history of very late birth!

TheDetective Sat 17-Nov-12 22:06:09

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cathycomehome Sat 17-Nov-12 22:13:37

But I'm fine with "no can't make it" as I said.

TapirBackRider Sat 17-Nov-12 22:17:06

I think it very much depends on how far away they are. 9.30 isn't an early start if you're all in the same village/town, but if people are driving fair distances to get there, then it's a different matter.

Some people also prefer to avoid the church stuff, but still wish to help their friends/family celebrate the milestone in the childs life.

OddFrog Sat 17-Nov-12 22:19:11

It's half way through the morning if you're up with a toddler! No problem. It's a pity people aren't prepared to make an effort for a friend. Enjoy your DS's special day and be especially bright and cheerful around the half-asleep complainers grin.

Cathycomehome Sat 17-Nov-12 22:19:14

It's a Christening. That's the milestone, a religious event. Don't come if you don't agree with it, I think.

ll31 Sat 17-Nov-12 22:20:00

He could still have been godparent surely, just got someone to stand in for him. . Its a job for life, not just the ceremony. ... seems bit unfrioendly to refuse your sister

HoratiaWinwood Sat 17-Nov-12 22:20:35

I agree, Cathy. It's like saying "I don't really like boring ceremonies, so I'll miss your graduation and just come to the lunch." No, you won't.

MsVestibule Sat 17-Nov-12 22:23:32

YANBU. Sunday is my turn for a lie-in, but as I'm used to getting two young children ready for school by 8.45, I really think that with a bit of effort I could brush my hair and put on a bit of make-up to be ready for 9.15.

shock at the rudeness of people saying they could probably make it for the after party. Very big of them.

Cathycomehome Sat 17-Nov-12 22:29:24

Well, I think I still think I'm right! Better go to bed as my mother's going to arrive at 9.30 for shopping, so I'd better be ready after my rants, thanks for responses.

HappySeven Sat 17-Nov-12 22:31:02

I don't think it's that early - what do people do on a school/nursery day? If you want to be there you'll be there.

Loshad Sat 17-Nov-12 22:33:12

pretty lazy imo, we are at rugby for 10 am every sunday, sometimes an hour drive away, as is the rest of the team. 9.30 is really not that early, if you have a toddler you are likely to have been up for 4 hours or more, but even without, if local that is a considerable lie in compared to to working week.

Snazzyfeelingfestive Sun 18-Nov-12 00:05:34

Horatia I remember at least one thread about graduations where people were saying just that, and that family members shouldn't expect you to sit through a boring ceremony! Does make me wonder whether for some people they feel any obligation at all to endure mild boredom or inconvenience for their friends and family, ever - it's not as if any of these things are 5 year jail terms! Surely you make the effort and expect people to do you the same courtesy when the time comes?

EvenIfYouSeeAPoppy Sun 18-Nov-12 00:13:13

It is early, but far from impossible to make. YANBU, and enjoy the day tomorrow. smile

(Our church service is always 9.30. But then again, school starts at 7 flipping 35 shock (not in the UK) Dc1 in Y2 and I'm still not over that)

MadameCreeper Sun 18-Nov-12 00:20:37

We are not church goers and it is early but we would make it and not moan out loud. We have to get up at 6am during the week.

Tommy Sun 18-Nov-12 00:27:49

if they want to come they would come at whatever time it was.

My nephew and nieces were christened at 9 a.m. 80 miles from our home. We got there in time because it was important.
You are not being unreasonable - they are.

And Catholics do christenings - they just call them baptisms. They are the same.


Felicitywascold Sun 18-Nov-12 00:27:57

Yanbu At All.

Lazy fuckers!

Clary Sun 18-Nov-12 00:36:58

Agree with those who say it's ridiculous to say it's early.

It's hardly your fault, a christening is not like a weddign is it, it happens when the service happens.

DS2 used to have his footie match at 10am on a Sunday, and we had to put the goal up so we used to get there before 9.30. That was every Sunday in the winter as well.

Surely people can drag themselves out of bed by 8am for a one-off? hmm

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