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AIBU?

AIBU to be a tad [hmm] about my neighbours new car?

426 replies

DairyleaAndPickleOnAStick · 18/10/2012 22:55

First off, this is absolutely NOT a benefits bashing thread.

I am probably BVU and this will show me up to be a nasty, mean spirited and bitter aul crone, BUT my neighbours just took delivery of a brand new car today- (think 3 letter, premium marque) - which they receive AFAIK through the motibility scheme. (Where I live this is very common practice.) Neither of them work and presumably receive benefits and HB. They definitely rent their house as we know the owner.

My DH and I were both high earning professionals before the recession hit and paid a very considerable sum for our own house, unfortunately we were both made redundant (within weeks of each other) several years ago and have fought tooth and nail to keep our home (both working very low paid unskilled jobs, taking in lodgers and DH moving away for a year to retrain.)

Obviously we are very fortunate to have been able to hold on to our home but it has been an incredibly tough few years- the pressures of redundancy, unemployment, and being on the breadline have taken a massive toll on our mental health, wellbeing and relationships- both with each other and family/friends.
My DH came home today soaked through after being out all afternoon in the pouring rain selling electricity door to door.

As I said upthread this is not a benefits bashing thread- I am fully aware that being on benefits is no picnic- DH and I spent 6 months on the dole and it was beyond grim, however AIBU to want to weep out of frustration seeing my neighbours new beemer parked in the driveway??

OP posts:
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MrsTerryPratchett · 18/10/2012 22:56

You can say a horse is not a horse. It doesn't make it a zebra.

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picnicbasketcase · 18/10/2012 22:57

To want to, no. To continue to be bitter about it or act weirdly towards them, yes. They might have won some money or inherited some for all you know. People living solely on benefits don't routinely buy brand new BMWs, afaik.

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threesocksonathreeleggedwitch · 18/10/2012 22:58

op would you like their disability?
then you could too have a car on the mobility sceme

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McHappyPants2012 · 18/10/2012 22:59

do you know how hard it is to get DLA.

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CoolaSchmoola · 18/10/2012 22:59

I think you know you AIBU....

If it's motability it's

a) because they need it due to a disability.
b) they will have had to have given up DLA to get it - they aren't free, they can either have Disability Living Allowance OR the car.
c) If it's a BMW it won't have been free - they will have had to have paid a contribution, which they will have had to save from their benefits.

I appreciate you are having a hard time - but envying someone for having a motability car is BU unless you are also envying the disability - which I doubt.

Be glad you don't need one.

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picnicbasketcase · 18/10/2012 23:00

Okay, I skipped a bit and didn't register the DLA part Blush but anyway YABU as its none of your business.

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DeadTall · 18/10/2012 23:01

No I don't think YABU. If it's a beemer then AFAIK they are likely to have had to paid a not insubstantial sum up front (at least £1200) under the Motability scheme

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NettoSpookerstar · 18/10/2012 23:01

I live in homeless accommodation.
Last December I got a brand new car.
You can have it if you take my brittle asthma tooSmile

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CoolaSchmoola · 18/10/2012 23:02

Just to point out DLA is an allowance that is paid to disabled people to help them live a "normal" life, to try to give them freedoms that non-disabled people have as standard.

It's not a benefit per se.

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threesocksonathreeleggedwitch · 18/10/2012 23:02

DLA IS NOT AN OUT OF WORK BENEFIT

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DairyleaAndPickleOnAStick · 18/10/2012 23:05

Mrs T haven't a clue what you mean, can you explain please?

Picnic, I agree, however upgraded motability cars are very common here (NI) and our local BMW garage have recently started to do them.

OP posts:
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threesocksonathreeleggedwitch · 18/10/2012 23:05

so OP do you want to be disabled?

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CoolaSchmoola · 18/10/2012 23:06

Deadtall

If they are on benefits (which the OP admits herself is beyond grim) then they will have had to go without something on money designed to be enough but not too much, to save the personal contribution.

So now it's not unreasonable to be jealous of people who have saved to get something?

Um HOW is that reasonable?

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MrsTerryPratchett · 18/10/2012 23:06

this is absolutely NOT a benefits bashing thread = horse

Now do you understand?

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devientenigma · 18/10/2012 23:07

I agree, you know YABU !!

up front payments here not cheap for a car you must give back!!

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threesocksonathreeleggedwitch · 18/10/2012 23:08

it isn't a benefit bashing thread...
it is the same old thick shit jealousy of disabled people getting "free" (like fuck) cars.

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ExitPursuedByAaaaaarGhoul · 18/10/2012 23:09

What colour is it?

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devientenigma · 18/10/2012 23:09

hopefully not green

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ABatInBunkFive · 18/10/2012 23:12

YABU if it is green blue or red
YANBU if it is poop coloured



waiting to hear if OP wants the disability with the car, has a feeling she will hear summat about feck all being wrong with them any way what with DLA being so easy to claim and everything. Hmm

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threesocksonathreeleggedwitch · 18/10/2012 23:13

no doubt the op's great uncles dog is disabled so she will know all about DLa

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Sassybeast · 18/10/2012 23:13

Do they have a goat ?
And a plasma?

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SkippyYourFriendEverTrue · 18/10/2012 23:14

Perhaps you could state what car (make and model it is? Then you, or we, can look it up on the Motability website and figure out how much it would have cost them. It might not be that much.

Perhaps BMW give preferential deals to Motability. Times are hard, and that might be a way of them selling more cars without having to cut prices.

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RinderThrillerNight · 18/10/2012 23:17

YABU.

I am sure they would happily trade in whatever disability they have that entitles them to receive the higher level DLA with you so that you can have the brand new BMW.

Honestly, some people do not have a fucking clue.

You may have had a hard time. You have no idea what sort of hard time your neighbours have had.

I got exactly what MrsTP meant. Just because you say (at least a couple of times) that this isn't a benefits bashing thread, doesn't mean that it's not a benefits bashing thread.

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CoolaSchmoola · 18/10/2012 23:19

You can get an upgraded motability car anywhere in the UK - if you are willing/able to pay the additional cost.

OP - my FIL is disabled, and has a motability car. Because his disability was caused by an injury he sustained at work (fireman) he was medically retired and has a decent monthly pension even though he is not of official pensionable age.

He does not receive income related benefits. He does receive DLA, his wife is his full time carer - she gets carers allowance because he requires full time care. Both of which they are entitled to and are not means tested.

As you say in your OP - you assume they are on benefits and get HB.... They may well not be. They may be in the same position as my inlaws. Hard working people, both public servants who were forced out of work by the injury which means my FIL can barely walk.

My Mum also has a motability car and aside from DLA has NEVER claimed a penny in her life, despite bringing us up alone. She was a civil servant til she retired. She owns her home outright. She would be appalled if anyone thought that because she has a motability car she is on benefits.

Be careful about assumptions. They can often be wrong.

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akaemmafrost · 18/10/2012 23:19

Yabu and ignorant.

Same old, same old.

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