We are 10 weeks in to placement with our beautiful 2 and a half year old son. We have had a really rough time (apologies I am not sure how to link to thread but it's the 'early days of placement - really struggling' one.) I feel like we're starting to get somewhere and although life is still very difficult at times, we are making progress.
I feel like in the last few weeks, I've really bonded with little one and am starting to develop feelings for him now. The problem is, DH hasn't and is very depressed. He was depressed before little one came home - we had a very difficult journey to approval and I think he was just 'done' with it all and would have probably given up on adoption completely had I not wanted to continue. I suppose I thought once introductions were over and we started to settle in to family life, he would feel differently. Instead he says he doesn't like our son and resents him for making his life poorer in every way. To anyone looking in, he is a fantastic dad and little one adores him, but he says it's all an act and he dreads the weekends, when he is around more.
He has had some counselling but it's not really helped and freely admits he is depressed but refuses to go to the dr as he thinks it's pointless as they'll just offer him anti depressants which he doesn't want to take. He's so difficult to be around. Irritable, joyless and so so negative about everything. I miss my husband but i want to make this work for all of us.
How can I help him and can this get better? I'm scared for our future because I think he genuinely hates his life at the moment and I don't know what to do. Sorry for the long post. I've had some fantastic support on this forum in the past and appreciate this community so much as I'm feeling pretty lonely right now.
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Feeling sad and lonely
86 replies
poppet31 · 01/12/2019 22:36
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