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Can they cross their arms to avoid Ash Wednesday cross?

98 replies

Ohfuxx · 11/02/2019 17:24

Kids go to Catholic school but aren't Catholic.

They don't want ashes on their heads Ash Wednesday.

Can they cross their arms like when you don't want to receive communion?

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LovingLola · 11/02/2019 17:32

Ask the school? Or they stay in their seats and don’t approach the altar?

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LovingLola · 11/02/2019 17:32

Is this their first Lent in the school ?

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MemorialBeach · 11/02/2019 17:37

I am pretty sure if you don't want ashes you just stay in your seat/pew when everyone else gets up/queues to get ashes. Crossing your arms indicates that you can't receive communion for some reason and would like a blessing instead. As far as I know there are no rules about who can and cannot receive ashes, so no need for an alternative such as a blessing. Happy to be corrected if I am wrong in this though.

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53rdWay · 11/02/2019 17:39

I think it would be simpler for them to just not go up for the ashes in the first place - priest’s not going to be expecting crossed arms as they would with Communion, since ashes are something everyone can receive plus you go up separately from communion specifically to get them.

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ineedaknittedhat · 11/02/2019 17:45

They just remain in their seat if they don't want the ash cross. If they go up they will receive it as the priest won't expect them to approach if they don't want one.

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cricketballs3 · 11/02/2019 17:49

All students at my Catholic secondary school are expected to go up no matter their faith/non faith. The hand on the shoulder is to indicate no communion at mass

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hopeishere · 11/02/2019 17:53

Yeah just stay in their seats. Is it this Wednesday??!? Should I be making pancakes?!?

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IHeartMarmiteToast · 11/02/2019 17:57

No ash Wednesday was last week

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StellaMorris · 11/02/2019 17:59

Ash Wednesday is on 6 March this year.

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CheddarAndCrackers · 11/02/2019 18:00

Ash Wednesday is March 6th.

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babysharkah · 11/02/2019 18:01

Ash Wednesday is March 6th. They can just stay seated.

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Ohfuxx · 11/02/2019 18:24

They have a very pushy head and I'm not sure she will allow them to stay seated with out a fuss and they aren't confident enough to stand their ground

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hopeishere · 11/02/2019 18:25

That's bonkers. Presumably the head knows they're not catholic? Why would she / he want them to participate in something only meaningful for catholics?

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MunteoirMajella · 11/02/2019 18:32

All children receive ashes at our primary school, as it is not a sacrament.

You would need to contact the HT and make it clear they are not to receive them.

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DappledThings · 11/02/2019 18:33

something only meaningful for catholics

Not just Catholics. Many CofE churches (at the higher end) do ashing as well. Not the point of the thread I know.

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Bluesheep8 · 11/02/2019 19:12

Totally not the point of the thread (sorry) but why would children who aren't Catholic attend a Catholic school?

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caughtinanet · 11/02/2019 19:18

No one here can tell you the answer, the only way to find out is to ask the school.

I also wonder why non catholics send their chidren to catholic schools that aren't their nearest one, it is your catchment school OP?

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GoldenEvilHoor · 11/02/2019 19:18

This reply has been withdrawn

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3boysandabump · 11/02/2019 19:31

My dc go to a Catholic school. They are Christian but not catholic. I've just asked one of them and apparently everyone gets its done. I asked what happens if someone chooses not to and he said that's never happened

I suppose you would need to speak to the teacher and explain beforehand that your dc doesn't wish to have the ashes.

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AveAtqueVale · 11/02/2019 20:19

At my Catholic secondary (which was 2/3 non-Catholic pupils) everybody got ashed and then washed it off in the lols afterwards. If they’re really against it I think they should just quietly explain to their class teachers beforehand and then sit it out. Or put up then wash it off. It usually wipes off with a hand tbh, then they can go and get rid of grubbiness later.

This has made me ponder though- I’m Catholic and DS1 is in Reception at a Catholic primary. He’s being investigated for ASD and I strongly suspect will hate having the ashes. If I ever put holy water on his forehead at church he acted like I was torturing him. (Get some funny looks when the angelic-looking small boy clutches his forehead and howls on contact with holy water Blush). Might give his teacher a heads-up that he’s liable to lose his shit dig his heels in somewhat if pushed into being ashified...

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Ohfuxx · 11/02/2019 20:25

Because the only school in our catchment that is any good is Catholic.

It was either an outstanding Catholic school or 2 schools requiring improvement and one inadequate.

They're smart enough to take it with a pinch of salt.

There are kids of other religions there too.

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Ohfuxx · 11/02/2019 20:26

I don't feel my kids should lose out on a better standard of education because we are critical thinkers.

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PleaseComeBackSafe · 11/02/2019 22:16

Genuine question from someone who knows nothing of the faith..what is Ashing? Why have ashes on their heads?

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jellycatspyjamas · 11/02/2019 22:46

I don't feel my kids should lose out on a better standard of education because we are critical thinkers.
Of course people of faith couldn’t possibly be critical thinkers too Hmm

Your kids would be losing out because you don’t subscript a central tenet of their value base, critical thinking has bugger all to do with it. Surely your kids are capable of wiping their faces after church?

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ComtesseDeSpair · 11/02/2019 22:47

I don't feel my kids should lose out on a better standard of education because we are critical thinkers.

Then surely they’re bright and critical enough to realise that when you have chosen of your own volition to be in an environment where beliefs or opinions which aren’t your own are paramount, sometimes you just have to fall in line with things which aren’t harmful in order to be respectful of those around you. I mean, I’ve eaten roasted rats when staying with generous hosts for whom this was the norm, a bit of ash isn’t going to kill them.

But if you and they are utterly opposed to it, only the school can give you a definitive answer.

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