Does anyone else hate presenting?

[Changednamealready]

I am rubbish at it, no not rubbish awful. My voice shakes, I forget what I’m saying (even if we’ll rehearsed). The days before I have to present I’m on a terrible mood.

I wish I could say I’m over egging how bad I am at it, but it’s horrific - I’m an introvert. I try not to be self obsessed and think people don’t care about me they care about the content etc doesn’t work...at uni (Many years ago) I remember tripping up on words when presenting and some girls laughing and I think it’s haunted me.

Yet every job seems to require some degree of presenting.

[anonnancy]

I hate presenting so much that I've deliberately not put myself forward for promotion or a new job opportunity if it says I will need to prepare a short presentation for the interview process... so you're definitely not alone!

I have a crippling fear of public speaking and just totally blank. I hate speaking and everyone looking at me even in a group conversation with friends / family.

In all other situations I'm very friendly / talkative and almost outgoing! Just the thought of messing up a presentation to the masses literally makes my heart rate increase and my palms sweat!

I have no advice or tips for you, but just know you are not alone.

X

[SwedishEdith]

Watch Tim Berners-Lee now on tv - he's thoroughly accomplished in his field and yet he's still clearly very nervous talking (settling down a bit now). Funny isn't it?

[StealthPolarBear]

Get a colleague in on every presentation you do and ask for very specific feedback.
Watch others present - the things you think are a big deal when you're up there aren't the things the audience picks up on.
Slow down your talking. What is the thing you're worried about? Mine is getting too far from the original point and having to tail off or change the subject abruptly. Now I know, I'm on my guard for it.

[Pukeworthy]

I love it, can never seem to land a role that requires it!

I dont think its an introversion thing, im very introverted.

[Changednamealready]

Pukeworthy can I bottle what your having but great you love it I would have thought most jobs have opportunities to present(?)

Stealth - I actually can’t identify what I’m worried about. I think it’s just I get there and lose track of what I’m saying , voice shakes, can’t remember what I’m talking about. I do two things under stress 1. In an emergency situation whereby someone is ill I’m a good person to be around I think clearly 2. In other stressful situations presenting, talking on a topic I feel nervous about to senior colleagues I can lose my place and just blank- completely. I think it’s my way of sticking my head in the sand. I’m a procrastinator but I think part of that is the fear... I turn away and run mentally. I’ve been in front of people before and lost what I’m saying and I really pick up on peoples expressions etc.

Swedish Edith I am going to watch!

Nancy I’m so the same - the problem is I have no choice. I recently completed a piece of work that I got someone else to present and by doing that sacrificed taking credit for it (they did credit me sweetly) but it was a career dive not doing it. That’s didn’t bother me too much but now it seems with professing with my career it’s the only option.

Our issue at work is everyone is so busy no one has time to sit in on me presenting.

Parrot I will look up the book- great you love presenting.

I just hate anything where I’m the centre of attention especially I think (reflecting) I never really have anything more clever to say than anyone else so maybe it’s more confidence than introversion.

[Changednamealready]

Meg me too- I try and sit down but have been told by a colleague not to do this. Meg my voice shakes and I feel I can see others pick up on this (paranoia).


Chemenger -😂 engineer comment... some really useful tips. You are so right about the losing the plot of trying to learn off by heart which I’ve tried to do previously. Also the saying it aloud, I just admit I’ve got myself in a state when I actually practice I can’t bring myself to say it aloud much as I get the fear which is obviously half the problem! Maybe also I’ve tried to rush it too much and maybe my depth of knowledge isn’t as good as it could be. I’m actually much more relaxed when the audience speak and ask me thing directly so it becomes more informal. It’s when they are v v quiet that it’s a challenge with just my voice. Thank you again for taking the time to reply!

Chottie I try and being the audience for questions but everyone often seems reluctant to say anything and before I’ve had someone dominate so I’ve happily answered theirs but found it then hard to focus on other members of the group and getting back to the presentation.

Swedish (hello again) yes I have to say I look at others and analyse they’re presenting skills. I think part of presenting is to make it interesting and you kind of need a bit of character to do this.. when I’m up there none, zilch just a jelly with legs🥴

[Hockneypool]

I’m an introvert but good at presentations. I see it as a performance - I’m me but just a bit more. I do have the exhaustion of the adrenaline crash later.

Someone earlier described it as leading the conversation and I think that’s right.

If it’s a new subject or piece of work I practise out loud until I’ve learnt it. Hearing how it sounds is really important - how we talk and how we write are different. And I time it, so if asked for 10 or 20 minutes that’s what I do. I don’t do word for word but close so I know what I want to say. But can say it in a few different ways - this is so I don’t get lost and then worry about losing my train of thought.

And I always practise the beginning so I start off strong and confident so everyone relaxes because they can see I can do it.

OP don’t give up your work to other people to present. Someone also said earlier the audience doesn’t know what you don’t tell them. I expect this is very true for you.

Good luck

[Hockneypool]

Also unless it’s very informal and only 3 people, stand up and try to stand mostly still. That way you take control of the room.

[MarshaBradyo]

I had to present a lot to big rooms of board people etc and got better at it. The trick for me was to feel like I was in a role. Acting a bit as a speaker.

Also slow down doing conference calls to many European clients at once helped me with this.

Not working atm but I quite like it now and can switch it on.

[MarshaBradyo]

I also learnt from one client to talk around a slide with notes or bullet points. Just a pic and / or a title it makes it less onerous for the listener.

[MarshaBradyo]

Whoops that should be without notes or bullet points

[NightsOfCabiria]

Has anyone else been in the middle of presenting and then had a vision of themselves running out of the room?

I didnt run, obviously, but the urge to do so was almost overwhelming.

I also find that I’m very calm and confident at first and gradually get more and more nervous and self conscious as time goes by.

[OhHellllooooo]

Yep hate it if I'm in anyway unfamiliar with a topic or have a potentially difficult audience. The fear/ dread of looking stupid or not being able to answer a question, or stumbling over something I'm trying to say.

However, I don't mind it at all if it's a subject I'm really comfortable with as I don't need to 'over-prepare', as I know I won't get lost/mess up.

[justanothersugar]

I hate it too!! I fainted during a school presentation once and that plays on my mind so much! I have to present on a regular basis and still hate it!

A few tips I’ve read about and have helped me (in a random order sorry!):

Breathing control and bum clenches (yes really!) just before the presentation help to physically relax the body

Familiarise yourself with the room layout if it’s somewhere new. I find that helps me to visualise giving the talk and where i will stand, put my glass of water etc.

Have some water handy in case your throat goes dry.

Depends on the audience but I put a quiz in a presentation once. It got people thinking about the topic rather than focussing on me presenting and gave me chance to catch my breath and drink some water!

Practice saying it out loud really does the trick. I had to present at a conference and it was the first time after mat leave and I was in tears the first time I said it out loud but got there with practice. Everyone afterwards couldn’t believe how nervous I had been.

Sounds like a cliche, but you’ve got this! Good luck!

[BreadSauceHmm]

I did used to but I found a way around it. If I view a few YouTube videos of stand up comedy (Michael Mcintyre, Omid Djalili, Lee Evans) the day before the presentation and try to emulate their confidence a bit, it works wonders 😂. It makes me relax. Try it, it might work for you too!

[Pollaidh]

I half hate, half enjoy presenting. I'm quite introverted although people don't usually believe that as I cover well. I'm exhausted after presenting. I present regularly from small groups to large rooms, from my peers to ministers and other VIPs. I get excellent reviews.

• Cut down, cut down. Don't overwhelm with multiple and busy slides.
  
• Tell a story. I don't mean give an anecdote, although that can be useful, but first figure out the main point you want to make, and then tell the story to make that point.
  
• If you can, sit on a desk or something, anything that gets you into a more casual frame of mind so the panic lessens and you can tell it like a story to a mate.
  
• Sign up for a public speaking/advanced presenting course. Much more useful than a sort of beginners one, and some really handy techniques.
  
• Take deep calming, slow breaths before. Focus on a distant point. Put a post-it note at the back of a meeting room if needed, and project to that.
  
• Rule of threes, people won't remember much more than three points.
  
• Be there in good time to sort room and check tech, because it's always the tech (projector, webinarapp etc) that fail, and then you panic.
  
• Don't hop from leg to leg. Take a wide stance (James Bond inspecting his latest Austin Martin is the look I go for, very grounding).
  
• Props, anything to make a connection with the audience.

[Pollaidh]

Oh, meant to say, YES to reading it through verbally before. I usually plan the talk and 'story', THEN do the slides, then set the timer and talk my way through it, which identifies sticky areas and timing issues. Usually then cut some slides as I go over time, go and explain to someone (cat if need be) the sticky areas until you absolutely understand yourself. Then read through again, then if I can, I practise on someone, but that's not always possible. I absolutely don't learn off by heart though, instead you need the signposts in the slides.

Some talks I have to give quite frequently with only minor variations, so once I know what I'm saying, I can repeat without all the palaver of practising, just a quick read through on the train/plane. The only things I actually memorise are any specific statistics needed to make a point in the story.

As for notes... I don't use cue cards and I don't write word for word (that is for speeches only). But I do cover every eventuality - laptop failure, slide failure, power cut, stolen bag- as I've suffered all, so I (if possible) have a copy on my laptop, a copy emailed to the host/colleague/cloud, a USB drive, and the printed notes pages, which have the memorised stats on too. All in different parts of my luggage... It may seem paranoid but I've had pretty much everything go wrong at one point or another, up to and including a terrorist attack. You can't be too prepared