Grievance raised against me

[Piggywaspushed]

I posted this yesterday in staffroom but I might get more traffic here possibly. (Sorry, I have made it longer so as to avoid dripfeeding but I don't want to out myself at the same time. I have NCd)

I don't want to go into too much detail here but does anyone have any experience of/ advice on having a grievance procedure raised against them?

Am in bits and most of online advice is for the aggrieved party and the info the head gave m yesterday is aimed at the aggrieved party, too. My local union guy is an old fashioned socialist type who, last time I met him, launched into a discussion about education and politics and wasn't useful.

Not been told what I have allegedly done just who has raised a grievance.

I don't need a character assassination here but just an outline of what valid grievances someone could have against another person : the colleague who has raised her grievance is not in any way my junior. We are co workers. She is not in two days a week and we only ever really communicate via emails so I am puzzled.

I also want to know , if her complaint is proven, what her endgame(s) could be?

I am being very careful not to now go around fact finding with my department colleagues (I have only told one and she is a close friend) but, for example, she spends a lot of time in our HoD's office with door closed (it's an interesting leadership style my HoD has!)if she has raised problems there, my HoD has never discussed these with me so this is a bolt from the blue. I know someone who worked with her in a previous school - a bit of digging reveals she has done this before : but , obviously, I can't mention this as an excuse! I think she knows I have a bit of a reputation for being a bit of a rebel and this makes me a soft target. I certainly inadvertently upset my line manager last week who then (apparently) cried and this aggrieved colleague rushed to soothe her. No doubt they then had a good bitch about me. But the line manager herself discussed matters with me later,and certainly hasn't raised a grievance herself. It just isn't what people do in my school.

It is clear she does not like me - but I can't see that as a viable reason to raise a grievance!

Lastly, assuming she has put this grievance in writing, should I request to see it? What are my rights there?

She has been frustrating me ever since she came to the school (she is a kind of automaton and keeps planning my lessons for me and organising me and I have found it hard to keep up.) - but I have never raised any of these issues as they seemed petty and I thought we were both just rubbing along. She seems to find me borderline incompetent : but that isn't a grievance, is it?

[Piggywaspushed]

Nuclear option

I am not sure I am being bullied but am fairly sure I am a victim of the fact that she is used to leadership and is frustrated that she cannot tell me what to do so instead Is setting out to show I am impossible to work with, rather than impossible to manage.


I am making a list later! Have no fear MN!

[TheFallenMadonna]

A competence-based complaint would surely be passed down to HOD first, which is what makes me think it will be about professional behaviour.

[Piggywaspushed]

I actually believe my head when he says he doesn't know the nature of her complaint Madonna . I would imagine she thinks my incompetence is unprofessional and obstructing her and she can add this to her belief that I have derided her work to others , I guess,.

[HamletsSister]

How is it going @piggywaspushed? Hope they told you what the complaint is and you are getting RL support with dealing with it.

[Piggywaspushed]

Thanks for asking hamlet and looking out for me.

I am in limbo really. No further forward. The other woman has had her meeting with SLT man. He scheduled a meeting with me for today but I am given to understand that she has not yet OKd the notes he took. He said he would reschedule to tomorrow (full teaching day!) but now I have not heard form him today. I keep crying at the drop of a hat and am now having palpitations.

In another development, I think I may have mentioned I was due to attend a dept meeting with her and a few others yesterday. She didn't attend, so I don't think I'd be too paranoid not to read something into that.

It's grim.

I have left a message for my union but they haven't called me back.

[TooStressyForMyOwnGood]

Also thinking of you OP. Keep chasing the union.

[Stormtreader]

I'm wondering if shes taken your overly-deferential emails to be a sign of weakness and has put through some kind of trumped-up grievance to cement a position of "shes in charge, you're only here because she allows it. After all, you dont want another GRIEVANCE raised, do you?".

You say you havent done anything wrong, I would try and go into this with an attitude of "shes clearly misunderstood something, the silly bunny, we'll get this cleared up efficiently and quickly".

[VictoriaMcdade]

It might be a bit of a stretch, but if she didn't attend, my guess is that she feels like she is in the wrong. Possibly.

In other words, you might be paranoid, but for whatever reason she does not want to be in a meeting with you. Not the actions of someone with a righteous sense of being above reproach?

so anyway, don't worry about that. You cannot control her actions in any way whatsoever.

[Piggywaspushed]

Thanks all.

In other news, I have been invited for interview at a different school next week!

[Piggywaspushed]

Victoria - that's certainly one way of reading it. I think it more likely that she is claiming she is too stressed to be in the same room as me, but ultimately we still have to co operate over this class we both teach.

[VictoriaMcdade]

The too stressed to be in the same room as you sounds very dramatic, especially as a reaction to something that you did not even realise that you have done.

Onwards and upwards, and good luck at the interview.

[BoneyBackJefferson]

If the meeting doesn't go ahead tomorrow I would start pushing back stating the stress that it is causing.

I would also look into the possibility of her using this to bully you.

[Piggywaspushed]

I assume she doesn't know that I don't know I did nothing, if you get my drift...

It is causing me stress but I am not the victim. I do totally understand my SLTs' hands are tied. They cannot be seen to be rushing or pressuring her.

I will admit that if I were the victim I would be moving fast to get things resolved and over.But that isn't her style, I guess.

[t875]

All the best piggy. Good luck. She isn't worth you being ill with.
I would also seriously think about going off for stress if this carries on.
The hanging around with all this is really bad. Thinking of you x

[Piggywaspushed]

Well, everyone... I have now had the notes, which read as if she is a child complaining (at considerable length) because I don't like her as much as I like everyone else. She has brought up some of my shoddiness over deadlines but most of it is about my sidelining of her at lunch and break. I am a genuinely friendly and outgoing person and this is very distressing.

The fact that I haven't eaten or slept since Friday rather suggest I am the bullied.

Union is being put on hold tomorrow until they pick up.

[TooStressyForMyOwnGood]

Oh dear, all sounds a bit silly. I am no expert but I would check if your work has any sort of values / behaviours guidebook - could she argue you had breached them? E.g. my (non-teaching) workplace has various behaviour guidelines for staff. They are very vague and it is possible for management to accuse someone of not following them even if it is a subjective feeling.

[Piggywaspushed]

No, we definitely don't!

[GinSwigmore]

She's claiming you haven't been playing nice?!
Fucking hell.
No idea what "sidelining" means in this context: I have been in many a staffroom/departmental room and encountered cliques on the way but adults can choose who they spend their breaks with.
Unless you have been sending her to Coventry it is baffling.
I once did have my head of dept not talk to me for two days (I'd called her out on something and she was pissed off with me). Despite the fact I was twenty years younger and wasn't actually in the wrong (Karma kicked her arse later but nothing to do with me) I apologised and she stopped sulking.
Is there any truth in what she's saying? Have you excluded her in any way? What is her evidence - anecdotal, log or witnessed? Most strange.

[Piggywaspushed]

I moved a box to sit next to a colleague when I could have sat next to her. There was a seat in a meeting next to her and I sat ina different one. I don't involve her in conversations.

Owing to her part time days she is not in on the day we have briefings. I may not have sat next to her in those either but I am sure I would have done!

None of this is wilful but I will admit I wouldn't choose to sit next to her. Because she sits by herself at lunch at her desk and speaks to no one really. Especially not once I come along.

[Piggywaspushed]

Gin, I shall borrow your 'adults can choose' line!

[TooStressyForMyOwnGood]

Oh good Piggy. Just thought it was worth checking. We have a printed guidebook .

[GinSwigmore]

especially not once I come along
Does she shut down in your presence, busy herself or go elsewhere?
In my head she was older as you said she'd been a head of English.
If she is friends with line manager, why aren't they chatting?
I think being part-time can be hard, personality clashes in a dept of 12 are not uncommon but those two instances of seating are not exactly Mean Girls unless you put the box on the seat next to her
Underneath her organised/smt outlook is she vulnerable or do you still think it's a power play of some sort?

[Piggywaspushed]

I think it's a power play but I don't know as I feel I don't know her. She is inscrutable.

The line manager sits in her office all lunch - it would be nice if she came out and spoke to us all/ made an effort. The second does that a bit more. We genuinely don't really get on but we still chat at lunch.

She busies herself when I am there. she is claiming this is because she is pretending to as she is so ignored.

She is about my age I think. Perhaps a bit younger. her kids are younger than mine I think.

I put the box firmly on my messy colleague's desk

[daisychain01]

Just to say, keep reminding yourself you know deep down you have done nothing wrong. If you can, shut out the 'noise' and stand firm, she sounds bonkers.

Good luck with the interview, that could be a good way of dodging a bullet. It isn't a weakness to walk away from a trouble maker, it's a strength and you'll feel the stress melt away.

[Piggywaspushed]

Thank you daisy.