Reported workmen harassing women - it was taken seriously...

[Notmymonkeys]

...so why do I feel like I'm making a fuss about nothing?

We're having work done on our roof starting tomorrow. The scaffolding went up on Saturday, but they came back today to put a sign up and finish a few bits and pieces. I arrived home while they were working.

I parked my car across the street, and as I had a fair bit of baggage and a baby, it took me a little while to get out of the car. I noticed one of the workmen say something to a woman passing by, who looked a bit embarrassed and kept walking. Then as I was crossing the road they shouted something at another two women passing by. I walked toward the gate, and one of them turned to me and started to say something (it's unlikely they would have recognised me as I wasn't around much on Saturday). I cut him off with my best 'teacher' glare and told him to please stop harassing women outside my house.

He denied he had done it, said he was just talking to his mate, I (shaking) put my key in the lock and went inside, slamming the door behind me. I could hear them banging about outside for another half hour, and I just felt horrible. Vulnerable and scared and sad

Anyway, I called DP to have a rant. He said it was totally out of order, and called the roofer, who completely agreed, and called the scaffolding company, who also agreed and promised that they took it very seriously and would deal with it. The roofer is on his way here to apologise to me in person.

So all the (men) I have reported this to have taken this seriously and been very clear that they consider it unacceptable and have dealt with it. Which is great.

So why do I feel like a silly little girl making a fuss about nothing?

Patriarchy really does a number on us doesn't it?

[Pepperwitheverything]

Monkeys, thank you so much for doing this!! Some 10 years ago, I walked past men on scaffolding on my way to work. These men intimidated me so much, by calling out stupid and ridiculous things like 'LOOK AT HER!!! HELLO THERE GORGEOUS'..., that I changed my route to work. It added on an extra 20 minutes....but I just LOATHED those men so much I hated their voices, I hated the sight of them, and I hated how they MADE me feel. Entitled, bullying shits!

So thank you, so much! You did a great thing, and your DH. For every woman who feels intimidated but not sure what to do.

[MrsChnandlerBong]

I am on such an angry hating phase at the moment that just reading this has made me see red.

I was harassed a couple of weeks ago walking the dog early morning past a car park being resurfaced. The comments weren't nasty, they weren't personal or rude but WHY did those five men, stood in a line, think it was OK to comment on my wellies? Or my hair? Or my pink lip gloss? They stood, in that way that only women know, whereby you can see them looking at you and appraising you as soon as you are spotted. So they all down tools and WATCH. So you feel uncomfortable. Men walk by invisible. Not us though.

[sashh]

Hopefully if they were in the wrong the women who were shouted at reported them too to give a clearer picture of what went on.

Who to and how?

The OP is paying them, she should expect someone not to use her house to harass anyone. As for asking for directions

[buffersandbumpers]

Happened to me the other day. Wolf whistling etc. The second time I just walked up the drive and told them what I thought and reminded them times have changed and that their behaviour was out of order. Got the normal sorts of abuse back (and of course denial). Told hubby who later went over and 'dealt' with it in his own direct way. Builders got their pay docked and manager apologised. According to the neighbours they'll be glad to see the back of them as the builders' language has been a nightmare. It felt good to have stood up to them but still annoyed they didn't have the balls to apologise themselves.

[Quangle]

"Excuse me Madam, how do I get to the top of this scaffolding? You look local and I thought you might know"

Yes it's possible that's what they said....

[WhoKnowsWhereTheSlimeGoes]

Well done OP and don't feel that it is less of a result because your DP called instead of you, what matters is that it was reported and you took a big step there, this may well give you the confidence to report any future incidents yourself and that's definitely a good thing.

[Zazzles007]

"Excuse me Madam, how do I get to the top of this scaffolding? You look local and I thought you might know"

Yup, I bet it went something like that.

Good on you OP for reporting this. I have to admit, as much as I live in a sexist and misogynistic society where I am, I haven't seen cat calls or wolf whistling from constructions sites for a good decade. But then again we're a mouthy lot where I am .

[KristinaM]

Loving all the apologists for street harassment on FWR chat