Fucking parents

[CuckooCuckooClock]

Whose kids can do no wrong/never need to be sanctioned.
I’m so sick of parents telling me I’m unreasonable for telling off their precious little angel.
Driving me totally crazy!
Just had a really defensive mum on the phone who has decided to complain about me punishing her child.
Aaaarrrgghhh.
I’m sure she’s perfectly nice but I need a rant because the phone call really got my adrenaline going.
Sympathy needed please.

My parents thought education was important, they took an interest, read my reports, went to parents' evening. But they didn't need to know every time I was told off for talking in class, or not paying attention, or not handing in my maths homework

^ this. I take an interest in my DC's education, provide what they need and so on, but if they revise or do their homework is down to them, they need to learn to manage this themselves as I won't be there when they are at university. They know to ask for what help they need.

I had one mum demand today speak to the vice chancellor because her (21) year old son hadn't been picked for the football team

This just made me laugh out loud.

What these parents don’t seem to understand is the disservice they’re doing to their children. Schools have to give mild sanctions and many many chances before they reach the point of getting serious. If you hit your co-worker, tell your boss to fuck off, fail to do the work required of you or don’t bother to come in a few times you’ll be fired and your mum steaming in all guns blazing won’t help anymore.

If these children can’t grow out of having been taught they’re the centre of the universe they’re going to become angry, bitter unemployable adults.

My ‘favourite’ parental complaint was when a young man blow his top when told that to study A Level Lit, he should be reading more than the set text to get high marks. He swore at me repeatedly. When reported, parents went mental (tried to take it to Ofsted) because, and I quote, boys of their ethnicity don’t swear so I was a liar and attacking their child. I wanted the child to fail 🤨 by telling him how to get better marks...

Or the parent who, when told that their child was bullying another badly, threatened to smash the shit out of me after waiting for me in the car park.

a percentage of the current crop of DCs will become the next generation of parents and teachers
It's already happening! I have spoken to my kids' teacher and asked him not to threaten to smack them in the face as my dd takes thus "joke" literally and please don't tell my son he is more stupid than his sister.

You have my sympathies too

I was at my DD’s (she’s in year 10) secondary school for a meeting with the SENCo on Monday. I was sitting in the reception area waiting to go in and I can hear a woman shouting her head off - I don’t believe you, my son would never do that, this is a shit school, you’re a cunt, fuck off, you’re all fucking useless

As she came storming past me she screamed “there’s rats in the kitchen”

I recognise the woman - her son was in the same class as my DD in primary school. I used to volunteer to listen to reading and he (and she) was a complete nightmare then - I can only imagine what a delight he is now

Similar challenges in my place of work in a medium secure unit for adults - their son is never the one in the wrong it's all the other patients or it's the staff

Letsnotusemyname his dad fuels the poor boy’s delusions. He has significant cognitive problems, and dad says he’ll be fine, “He has friends high up.”
I got called a “nosy old cunt” today from another boy I support. Why? Because I suggested throwing glue sticks at people, even if they say they don't mind(!) wasn’t on. He hadn’t had his meds (again), though mum works inside school hours. (No dad in the town)

I’ve had this in NURSERY!
I had to speak to a 4 year old boy’s mum because he tried repeatedly to bite another child on the face. Mum’s response “not my boy”.
Another time I had to tell a 5 year old girls mum that her preciousness kept threatening her “BFF” that she would slice her on the face with a ruler, mum just laughed & walked out.
It’s terrifying how young this crap is starting.

Times really have changed. My mum complained IN WRITING to my teachers that I wasn't getting enough homework (!)

Now most of the parents seem to want to be their child's BFF rather than their, you know, PARENTS.This is going to bite the country in the arse someday soon...

One boy disagreed with me today that calling a classmate a 'fucking cunt' was not acceptable and if I told his parents they wouldn't care as they say it all the time.
Looking forward to that conversation when they eventually call back

So much sympathy for people venting on this thread. I left. I couldn’t bear the lack of engagement/support from parents, or the sheer rudeness and entitlement of many of their children. Even some of the “nicer” kids left me thoroughly unimpressed by their attitudes to my personal time (“When are the intervention sessions, Miss?” “Erm, where’s your pen?”) and many of the worst behaved children, while I know in many cases it wasn’t their fault, left me believing out of town boarding schools are the only solution to deal with disruption and abusice behaviour in schools.

Buddha , what a situation for you! Your appreciation is much appreciated

Times really have changed. My mum complained IN WRITING to my teachers that I wasn't getting enough homework (!)
People still complain about that and an equal number complain about too much homework, according to my dcs' teachers at an information meeting. I think the difference now is that parents are much more likely to complain about every little thing. I was at school in the 70s/80s and i only ever remember hearing of one parent complaining, when I was in the sixth form. It was much rarer. Perhaps that (and your parents) was the beginning of the big rise in parent complainers.

When there were Year 9 SATs, the tests were in the hall on the ground floor. One lad decided the task wasn’t for him and legged it out of the window. Parents were invited to come into school to discuss. They were adamant that their boy wouldn’t do a thing like that. Unfortunately for them, there was written evidence from the entire year group, plus supervising staff that he had indeed, absconded through the window.

His younger brother was the only boy I know of, who was excluded for a fixed term before he even started at the school. On the induction day, he climbed a tree in the grounds and refused to come down. Then he attempted to sell cigarettes to year 11 boys. That didn’t go well.

Yes, there is a massive sense of entitlement in parents that trickles down to their offspring.

My own children range in age from 7-16, and the parents in dc3’s class are much more over-invested and critical than in dc1’s time. I trained as a teacher 20 years ago (but then went and did something else) so I tend to back the teacher, and now I have started work as a TA it’s harder to listen to the moaning on WhatsApp. I think they forget there are 30 children between a teacher and 1 part time TA: and it’s always the ones whose kids are on the ‘top’ tables who are moaning about books not being changed/ maths hw not set. Just read a book at home, buy a Bond book from WHSmith. Why all this angst in year 3?

A mum on a school trip last week told me (TA) that I had made her daughter sad because I had not given the child a sticker when she had asked for it. I just said ‘stickers have to be earned, you don’t just get them for asking’ and laughed. And then realised the mum was not joking... And her child was not upset, she was slightly disappointed. Which is ok. Children need to learn to cope with mild disappointment and move forwards.

It’s interesting how many children’s response to being denied their request is ‘but I want it/ want to’. That seems to be viewed as some sort of trump card. I always say: ‘well, I want a unicorn, and I’m not getting one of those either’. It’s a matter of time before I slip into my mother’s favourite ‘I want doesn’t get’ 😁.

I like kids, and kids like me, (despite being quite strict) but I am not sure I have the patience for this long term...

We are quite protected in our school by a Head who is quite blunt and forthright and deals with difficult parents sharpish.

We had one a few years back who wrote in before her child started in Reception, saying her dd would refuse to wear the standard uniform grey tights, and enclosing a link to some sparkly silver ones that she would prefer.

And another one whose son was receiving a range of interventions, partly because extensive unauthorised absences meant he was behind where he should be. These groups started at 9.10am, but the child was missing lots of them due to lateness (no particular reason for this). Parent told us we should change the entire intervention timetable to suit.