Does anyone else look young?

[user1471888857]

I'm 31 this year and look 19/20 no joke.
I hate it.
I get patronised and spoke down too all the time in shops/cafes etc.
I was in a shop and I was looking at a jumper and a very very snooty assistant said "oh dear I think that would be more suitable for you when you get a bit older"
Also I joined a counselling course and the course was ladies probably 25-45 and nobody let me speak.
A woman was 41 and everytime I spoke she rolled her eyes ..or butted in then had the cheek to say .."your young what do you know"
I'm so very annoyed with it.
I was in a taxi with a friend going to a pub and didn't have id and taxi man said .."you might get lucky tonight,door staff not on till late,you young girls today"
I'm 30 years old !!!!

[Zhabr]

I am look youngish. Probably even younger from the the back ( quite slim, long hair). I do get patronised sometimes. Also people tend to tell me "you probably don't remember this and that, as you been quite young". I do remember...

[anxietywinsagain]

I do. I got asked if I was a junior in one of my jobs the other day as the bloke was surprised a 'junior would know how to do that'. Im 30 and look a lot younger. I like looking young but have had a few things like not being let into clubs and I'd forgotten my ID and recently when I said to the bouncer I'm 30 he went 'yeah alright and I'm Father Christmas' and refused me entry. I then found my ID
Other annoying things include patronising looks when saying I have a child as well. Not that age should matter at all with that but I definitely get dodgy looks when I say I have a child and several people have confessed it makes sense I have a child once I tell them my actual age. I always make new people guess my age if they ask it too.

[tigerdick]

I'm hurtling towards 40 and still get carded and asked what uni I'm at all the time (twice this week already). It's amusing until your same-age friend gets asked if she's your mum!

Years of oily skin hell finally paying off...

[Cellardoor23]

I'm almost 30 and people think I'm about 23/24. I put it down to my oily combination skin though. I still get id'd if I go to the pub which is once in a blue moon these days lol. They always look so surprised!

[Cellardoor23]

anxiety I know what you mean. I've felt like that as well with how young I look and carrying a small baby. Not that it should matter.

[DamaskRose]

Yes I had that right up to early 30s. I had short hair through teen years and 20s growing it to shoulder length and having a more sophisticated cut is the point at which I remember looking 'grown up' at last. I know it seems like a lucky thing and nothing to complain about, but I do relate to OP and other posters' frustration at not being taken seriously.

Yy about glasses for gravitas - I've done that sometimes and it works really well.

[velourvoyageur]

I'm 22 and I've can't remember ever having been talked to in the way you describe

Some people do mention my age but I feel respected on the whole, professionally and otherwise.

People should be treating you with much more respect, but maybe you're being too quick to assume they're responding to your appearance. Maybe it's something else. Which isn't to say that they should be responding in that way. But since being young is kind of like currency in this culture....kind of comes across like a stealth boast :)

[velourvoyageur]

And to be honest, I know many young looking people and they tend to stamp on any sign of disrespect. In a 'LOL who on earth do you think you are' kinda way.

I'm desperately trying not to victim blame here! Promise. I'm just saying that maybe they're responding to something else in your demeanour that's not age related - cos I know many young people who get the same respect (on the surface at least) that others do. Are you confident generally? Are you sure you're not anticipating people's reactions and it's become something of a self-fulfilling prophesy? People do exploit meekness.

[smudgedlipstick]

I am 25, and look a lot younger, I get ID' everywhere, a few years ago I was buying plastic knives in tesco and got asked for ID I think you have to be 16 to buy knives! My most recent, I was out wit my 2year old and my mum and her partner for lunch in a very nice restaurant, I was sat with the dd and obviously looking after her and my mum was sat over the other side of the table. I woman on the table next to us had been sat there the whole time we were there and as she was leaving, she touched my mums arm, and Said, 'I would just like to day how wonderful your little girl behaved in the restaurant, you must be very proud' my mum looked at her and said Thankyou but that's her mum and pointed to me. The woman looked at me with huge surprise and walked off very quickly the look she gave me was as if how could such a 'young' mum raise such a well behaved dd

[TronaldDump]

Well it didn't take long - we don't look young, we're all meek, stealth boasting and delusional, not young looking at all!

I'm not trying to disrespect you velour. Promise. But at 22 your career is just taking off. When you've taken a team of people who work for you to a meeting in New York and the first thing your US counterpart says when meeting you face to face is 'Oh my god but you're so young!!' it can feel a little undermining. But thanks for your opinion anyway.

I also had someone comment on the big age gap between me and my 'brother'. I was 33 and pregnant with DS2 at the time - and DS1 was only 2. I don't think people engage their brains!

[SuddenBeetE]

Both me and DH look really young, early 20s young. I don't mind at all!

However, we both work at University and blend in with students, at a recent open day 3 different people asked DH what he was studying. He finished studying 15 years ago!

Our staff car park has a parking attendant and when the usual fella is on his holidays the stand in always has a good old check of my staff parking permit, and asks how long I've been there..

Get some odd looks when out with the DC, oldest is 11 youngest 3 weeks.

[Twiterati]

I have always looked very young for my age. As a first time mum I got asked if I wanted to buy a child's ticket on a bus once. I hated it. But now I am in my fifties I am very grateful that I still retain the youthful looks to a certain extent. People often can't believe I have daughters in their thirties and am a grandmother..

[FayaMAMA]

My parents always say that I've looked 22 since I was 12/13. If I has mascara (if not, I look like a baby, it's incredible). It was both a blessing and a curse. I went to a work function with my dad when I was 14 and had one of his juniors buy me a drink (a Cosmo I believe) and try to get me to go back to his hotel room You should have been the poor guy's face when my dad came charging over

[itssquidstella]

I'm 31 and people usually assume I'm early to mid-twenties. I bloody love it, to be honest, and I'm hoping I continue to look younger than my years until I'm well into middle age!

[itssquidstella]

I got IDed buying a lighter last week - totally made my day 😀

[BuntyFigglesworthSpiffington]

Don't you know that everyone on MN looks ten years younger than their actual age OP?

In ye dayes of yore (30 years ago) 35 year olds generally wore different styles to women in their 20s whereas these days there's more of a blur between the generations. Plus skincare, makeup etc. all make a massive difference. Your average 45 year old looks very different to the way her own mother looked at 45.

As for my own stealth boast, I'm 38 and sometimes get asked for ID when buying booze but I think that's more down to the people doing the asking being mere whippersnapper teenagers themselves so they think 'could be 25, could be 35' and then decide to be a bit over zealous.

[NuzzleandScratch]

I get this a lot. I'm 34, but people tend to think I'm about 18-20. I don't even try to buy alcohol any more, as I find it embarrassing getting IDed. I have 2 dcs, which I think has aged me in pics, but not it seems to others. I have a job which involves seeing clients 1 to 1, and often get asked "so how long have you been doing this then?" They soon go quiet when I say 12 years! Looking a few years younger than your age is great, but people thinking you're a child is quite another! For me I think it's partly about physical size, as I'm 5'3" and petite build.

[Gingermum]

Honestly User it will get better!

I'm 50 and look much younger. Partly genetics but also using a good sunblock way before it became de rigueur. I have photos of a holiday in Greece with my friends at 18. Everyone except me was slathering themselves in coconut oil and sizzling in the sun. I'm always in the background under a tree resembling a milk bottle.

I also do yoga because as a very flexible 80 year old teacher once said: 'You are only as young as your spine' and by exercising regularly - walking is fine - you prevent your spine from shrinking and becoming one of those bent over old ladies.

It seems people have been very rude to you but fuck 'em. Looking young may annoy you now but it's going to be wonderful later! xx

[FrustratedFrugal]

I used to detest my babyface but at 40+, I see it as a gift from the gods. If I age like my aunts (they look more like me than my mother does), I will still look girly at 75. My top tip is using daily high spf sunscreen - it makes a huge difference.

[imjessie]

Yes I have always looked young ( so I'm told ) I'm fair with freckles and curly hair so it makes me look quite childlike . Putting on weight and getting over 40 will help . Most people still think I'm late 20's though!

[aphrodite30]

I'm 31, was asked an I.D when I tried to buy lottery. Lol

I just laughed but lady was serious. I was like, okay can I just buy a candy lol.

Funny but true

[dailymaillazyjournos]

I look a lot younger than my 55 years. In my case it's down to a genetic collagen disorder so I can't take the credit for a fabulous beauty/health/exercise regime.

Baby soft, velvety, unwrinkled skin is the one advantage. The rest is shit - osteoporosis, fatigue, sprains and tendon tears and inflammation, constant bruises, poor healing, bladder problems and severe constipation.

I'm also very short and sort of look like a bit like a hobbit which I think adds to looking younger than my age and I have only a few grey hairs. I feel youngish for my age on the outside but absolutely ancient inside. My Mum was the same. Strangers thought she and my oldest brother were a couple.

As I've got older I don't look as obviously young as I used to. In my 20's and 30's I was still asked for ID. Hasn't happened since I have to say. I'd be glad of looking young. Practice being assertive and firm and stamp down on any patronising, then reap the rewards as you get older when you still look younger than your years.

[hiccupgirl]

I've always looked younger than my age and got IDed up till around 32ish.

At 44 people tend to assume I'm around 37-38 and I regularly get asked if I'm planning more kids when I tell people I have an only child. I have def aged more the last couple of years but generally my oily skin is holding up well. I've always used skin cream with SPF so 20 odd years and I've never tried to get a tan, all of which helps I think.