'Deliberately' grey hair - yay or nay?

[PickledLily]

What's the verdict from the MN jury on this matter? Is it possible to look chic/stylish/un-bag-lady-like in your 40s with (some) grey hair? Does it need to be short, long, mixed with other colours, or just avoided at all costs?

[neuroticmumof3]

Does anyone know if you can use Colour B4 on dyed grey hair? I've been googling it but can't find it mentioned anywhere.

[chickydoo]

Nay

[neuroticmumof3]

I started going grey at 13 and now at 44 I am about 90% white at the front, 50% everywhere else. I regularly dye mine and have gone much blonder over the years (I used to be chestnut, looked brown but with lots of gold/red when the light caught it, sobs). I think other women with grey/white hair look amazing. I wish I were brave enough to go the Judi Dench/Jamie Lee Curtis route. Not sure short hair would suit me and don't think I could cope with growing it out. Also very worried that I would look bald at the front. When my roots show the hair is so white that you can kind of see pink skin. I worry it would be very noticeable if I were to go au naturel.

[mamaonion]

Ooh great thread! I'm 30 and quite grey but like to think I make an effort and don't look old for my age. I think 50 would be my minimum age to go grey, but I have a long way to go so may change my mind before then.

I've seen one or two young looking (40s) very grey mums who are very grey and have thought it ages them, perhaps it's the casual clothes. It didnt look horrid, just a bit odd- but that could be because we dont see ladies natural colour too often. Maybe it looks best with a polished sharp look.

[Mayisout]

My sil has whitey/blondey natural grey hair and it looks great. But the prob is mousey hair with grey through it, looks dirty (what mine is like underneath). But bluey grey hair with a suntanned skin looks great (like many of the pics of older women on the first page).

So it depends on skintone and shade of grey. I will be a grubby mousey colour for years before I go grey (judging by my parents) and the grey hair is slightly kinky, not sleek and flat like my hair is now. So does not bode well, and I have fair skin so I will colour mine.

[PuppyMonkey]

But you don't think that photo of Jamie Lee Curtis shows her natural hair colour do you? she obv dyes it like that IMHO.

[deleted203]

How do you get grey hair? (If that's not a stupid question ). I have been toying with the idea as I'm pretty sure most of mine is white underneath the dye, looking at my roots as they come through.

The thing is I have shoulder length hair, fairly dark brown (as was my natural colour) and I'm mid 40s. I'm fed up, frankly, of having a permanent colour applied every four weeks or so and keep thinking of letting it go. I just can't face simply leaving it alone as I think it would look weird to just let the roots keep growing out.

So...do I switch to a semi? Do I have streaks put it? Crop it all short (sob). How do I get from where I am to being grey (white) all over? Any suggestions?

[PickledLily]

Mewsical - I'd love it if my hair could stay that well groomed was like that. Same length, but no fringe and much thinner/finer.

Grey can definitely look great with a pixie hair cut and make-up, but I think I agree with Dolly - it does make the person look older unless the skin is glowing (but only, I think, because we aren't used to seeing younger women with grey hair).

Rats, rats, rats. I look rubbish with short hair, I don't wear much make up and my dress style definitely isn't cool enough to carry it off. But I don't like my colour either - it's too red/auburn for my skin tone.

What to do....

[nooka]

I suspect it totally depends on the person as we all go grey/white in different ways. Some people look washed out, some look very distinguished and some really quite dramatic. I am getting a fair bit of salt in my dark hair, but prefer to have a few streaks of colour than an all over dye job. I don't wear make up (never have) so for me it's more about wearing the right colours to go with my skin tone/hair, and getting the dye right too. I had a colleague who decided to drop the dye (she'd always dyed it to match her previous colour) and was really quite strikingly grey. Sadly it obviously didn't appeal to her because she then came in platinum blonde, which looked terrible!

[Loveleopardprint]

I am always on here cheering for grey hair. I have short pixie cut. Love it. No more sitting for hours with muck on my head. My hair keeps getting more and more silver. I have pale skin but I think it suits me more than a dark dye. Always wear make up and lipstick though. I say go for it.

[Dollydowser]

I looked at the first site your posted perrycombover, to me some of those ladies look so much younger in the photos with colour in their hair, and so much older in the photo of them with grey hair. That tells me I am definitely not ready to grow my colour out yet. Each to their own.

[Mewsical]

Is your hair like this?
There are some other really good pics on here.

Think the thing is.....to have a brilliant cut and always wear make-up.

[Rooble]

chippy I love your name! My DS was only allowed to watch Trumpton/Camberwick Green DVDs when little as I read somewhere that modern animations have too many images per second for a child to cope with. So I've been able to watch and love them again myself!

[purplepenguin86]

I think it can look really nice if the cut is good (particularly pixies eg Judi Dench, Jamie Lee Curtis etc) and your style is right. I think you have to make sure your clothes are really stylish and on trend though, and wear nice jewellery, good make up etc, or you can run the risk of looking a bit frumpy.

[Aquelven]

I'm put white, really, not a trace of another colour.
Started to go white in my mid teens & was pure white when I married at 23.
I love it. Wear it in a mid length bob. I get loads of compliments & even get asked where I get it coloured which I find amazing!

[PickledLily]

"boot-cut jeans or mum-boots or fleeces". Phew, I think I'm in the clear.

Has anyone tried returning to grey and regretted it?

[ChippyMinton]

Well done Rooble. I did mine when all the light brown base colour got bleached out and went a disgusting bright gold shade on my summer holidays. My hairdresser gradually added cool ash lights instead of gold, and after about 6 months I'd pretty much got it rid of the base. The only dark bit is underneath so I have a shaped bob which exposes it under all the grey/blonde so it looks deliberate.

[Rooble]

I am just transitioning now, and think this bit is the difficult bit. Dyed it for 15 years. Have upgraded my wardrobe (fitted clothes, strong colours, more makeup and esp strong lipstick colours). I can't wait until the brown has all grown out. Getting silver highlights next week to speed up the process!
(Have one 5-year old and definitely DON'T look like the oldest mother in the playground)

[Rooble]

I am just transition

[ChippyMinton]

pickledlily - it's really those that are stuck in a timewarp style-wise, clothes and hair and shoes. The younger mums have never owned boot-cut jeans or mum-boots or fleeces.

[Caerlaverock]

I am really pale and would look horrific if I unleashed my grey

[DuchessOfAvon]

I am my natural colour for the first time since I was 16. I am pretty salt-and-pepper but it falls in streaks. My base colour is mouse so its actually livened up my hair no end. My natural hair colour works much better with my skin tone too - that has been a revelation.

I am over 40 and have one primary school kid and one at nursery. I keep fit, try to dress well and I feel fine in my skin for the first time in ages.

Sheesh - I never twigged I am a prematurely aged hag - shoot me now.

[Sonotkylie]

I have a white stripe through my dark brown hair. Been like that since I was 18 or so. I dyed it for years and then decided I couldn't be bothered anymore. Its still a stripe not pepper and salt and my hairdresser cuts it to show it off (she loves it!). You do need to be careful with the style as too much grey around the face (particularly after a bad night or with no makeup - don't wear much but blusher essential) can be very ageing. I much prefer it now to when it was dyed. Oh and DS is in primary school and all his friends love it (I find that a bit weird but they are 5 and a lot of what they do seems weird if I'm honest)

[Teeb]

Jamie Lee Curtis looks amazing with her short crop and grey hair, but then she is Jamie Lee Curtis.