Shared Parental Leave and Parental Leave – what do you think and know? Chance to win £100! NOW CLOSED

[AnnMumsnet]

As part of the Mumsnet Family Friendly Programme we'd love to know what you think about these new employee benefits which have been introduced in the last few years.

You can read about them below - please share on this thread your experience of them and your thoughts on them. Have you taken them up? Do you think you would? Have you heard of Parental Leave? How do you think employers feel about them? Has your employer promoted them to you/ employees? Has your partners company promoted them?

All comments welcome!

Shared Parental Leave - this is for new parents and is designed to give greater flexibility around the first year with a new baby
Government info here
ACAS guide here

Parental Leave - this is unpaid leave for parents to take care of a child's welfare - employees are entitled to 18 weeks’ leave for each child and adopted child, up to their 18th birthday with their job protected
Government info here
ACAS guide here

Both are obviously subject to specific terms.

Add your view and you'll be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £100 voucher for the store of their choice.

Click here to learn more about companies who are working to make the UK a more family friendly place

Thanks and good luck
MNHQ

Standard Insight T&C apply

[Marg2k8]

Both are a good idea.

[Dangermouse80]

Think this is an excellent idea. Lots of families have parents both working full time. We split everything 50/50 so I am happy that I am taking 9 months maternity, whilst my OH takes the remaining 3 months. I believe having this leave available should make women / men viewed more on the same level when they have children, instead of automatically assuming the woman will be the one off work.

[jt75]

Good idea but I can't see employers and fellow employees being too keen.

[wjanice121]

It gives greater flexibility to families. Depending on a family's circumstances it might be more financially beneficial for the father to take the longest leave.

[alabaster002]

Utter nonsense - it is no great surprise that few fathers take parental leave given that they will be disadvantaged at work for doing so. There is enough annual leave to allow fathers to spend time with their new-borns if they wish to do so.

[walk1992]

It may work for some but not for us at the moment

[lindagreenwood]

parental leave should be shared. The other parent is an equal parent so why should it be one sided?

[alsproject]

Its a great thing as it means the father can take some time off as paternity leave to help out

[chrismse]

I think it is great that there are choices now. when I had my kids you just got 6 wks maternity leave and when back to work or lost your job.

The only thing is it maybe too much for small business, even if its unpaid they still have to replace someone and agency costs are very high.

[glennamy]

Good in theory but in most cases unworkable. If one person works in a high position then they are unlikely to be able to take an extended break as a large wage is needed for just getting by... it is also a negative to career progression no matter the so called promises made that it would not be a hindrance.

[samcornfield]

I think both are a great idea. If shared parental leave had been available when I took maternity leave then I would have shared it equally with my husband.

[cluckyhen]

I'm kind of on the fence with all this parental leave. When I had both of mine it was only 12 weeks Mat Leave and hubby had no leave rights. As he is a soldier I don't see how he would be able to take leave if we decided to share it.

I am fortunate enough to work from home so it makes more sense for me to remain as the primary carer - whereas his job often takes him away from home, and bulk leave would be detrimental to his career promotion wise.

[Rigbyroo]

I didn't really know anything about it and was so worried about getting it wrong that I didn't look into it. A possibility for the future if we have anymore.

[grumpymummy3]

The company my partner works for had promoted it but it came too late for us to benefit from it. Personally I still think I would have taken all the time off even if it had been available as financially it would mean we would be worse off.
We haven't yet used parental leave as it hasn't been needed and its unpaid in the companies we work for but will use it if I need too or afford too. Not sure how it would be tracked but would use for the oldest first down the youngest.

[EllieQ]

I've heard of both and used both. I had my first child last April, and I took seven months maternity leave followed by DH taking two months paternity leave (we couldn't afford to take any unpaid leave so I would have gone back to work after nine months if ShPP wasn't available). DH also had his three weeks paternity leave at the start (his employer offers an extra week). I went back to work full-time, but had accrued enough annual leave that I could take two days off each week for those two months, which eased me back into working life! We both went back to work in after nine months (I've dropped to four days) and DD started nursery then. It made my return to work easier as I didn't have to worry about settling her in nursery at the same time, but when she started nursery the new routine was a bit of a shock to the system - I'd got quite used to having a stay-at-home husband :)

DH had always been a very hands-on dad and looked after her on his own at weekends, but I don't think he really understood the reality of being at home with a baby all day for most of the week until he'd done it himself! He did take her to the baby groups I'd gone to, but said he always felt like a bit of a novelty there even though people were friendly. He had some leave to use up before the paternity leave started, so took a week off before I went back to work and came to baby groups with me to meet people. We'd kept in touch with the couples from our antenatal course so he already knew a couple of the other mums there, but it was definitely more isolating for him than maternity leave had been for me.

Practically, it worked for us because:

• Supportive employers (both public sector). My employer was happy for me to come back full-time but use leave to work short weeks, then drop to four days a week once DH went back to work. DH didn't have any issues with getting the leave, and is now working compressed hours (ten days over nine), so he has one day at home every other week.
  
• Equal pay: we earn the same amount, but DH was only entitled to SMP on ShPP, and my enhanced maternity pay stopped after six months. So we had the same amount coming in for the last three months whether I was back at work or he was at work (this was the reason I didn't drop to four days a week until we were both back at work).
  
• Not breastfeeding (a bit controversial!): I tried and failed to breastfeed, and switched to formula in the first weeks. This meant that I had no worries about DD not taking a bottle, as previous posters have mentioned. It also meant that I was able to leave DD with DH from quite early on, so he had spent more time looking after her on his own than might have happened if I had breastfed (based on a couple of friends who EBF and weren't able to spend much time away from their babies until they were older).
  

I agree that a cultural change is needed, and wonder how long it will be before a dad taking ShPP becomes the norm. I did meet a couple of people who said they wouldn't want to share the leave, which I thought was selfish, but then I was happy to get back to work as I felt I as losing myself at home - other people seemed to enjoy maternity leave more! I did feel the odd one out in the (usually) middle-class NCT-type groups I went to when I went back to work, as it was early - most people were taking the full year then going back two or three days a week, or not returning to work at all. Now the babies are older I'm less of the odd one out, though I only know one other person who has gone back four days a week.

I really hope more dads take up ShPP over the next few years - it's really helped DH to be closer to DD, and he understands the (invisible at times) workload of being at home with a baby!

[farhanac]

I think it is a positive step and gives greater flexibility

[Gillyb0r0]

I think both are a good idea but somehow I can't see many men taking up their share! However, it is important that they have the chance to do so if they wish.

[georgiecurl]

it should be available to both, and it should be their decision as to who takes it

[Narnianescape]

I feel shared parental leave is a good idea as it is good for both parents to have a good bond with their children

[lizd31]

It depends on each individual family whichever works best for them. My nephew is a stay at home Dad.

[LeeR1985]

I think both of them are great ideas and can be beneficial for both parents. The only problem is how much you get paid for the shared parental leave. If it's less than what you would earn being in work, it may not be a viable option. My employers haven't mentioned anything about either of them but I imagine they would be accomodating with any requests.

[VelvetGlove]

So the Shared Parental Leave is a great idea and I've seen signs of the company I work for geearing up for requests and putting policy in place.

The Parental Leave is harder as it's unpaid. Where I work we're given 'Special Leave' to use for unforseen issues which is paid leave. We're only supposed to take a handful of days and then it would become unpaid leave if we needed more. I don't know about others on here but we'd find it really hard to make ends meet for even just the essentials if either of us go to unpaid leave!

[allsorts4444]

I think both are a great idea. More options means more opportunities :)

[ElizabethG81]

I'd love to use Parental Leave once my children are at school so that I can cover the summer holidays. Unfortunately, I can't imagine that my employer would be thrilled (and this is local government, who like to view themselves as "family friendly").

[lhlee62]

It depends on your circumstances, I work for a company which has a decent maternity leave policy, but DH is self employed so we wouldn't be able to pay the bills if he took leave/ didn't work full time. Also I breastfed my 2 so going back to work when they are little wasn't really viable as I had a job where I couldn't be disappearing several times a day when the kids were very little. It is great for some families, but not for ours