Statement has come through, feeling pleased but underlying sadness

[ThomCat]

So, as you may have read, out statement for Lottie has come through. After being told to go away and that she was "developing age appropriate skills" and was too young we have now been 'awarded' 10 hours a week, out of the 15 hours she attends nursery. So all good.

However, can't help but have a moment to myself of sitting here feeling a teeny bit emotional as I read through her description, and if I'm honest, comparing her to the little girl who walked into school today and was chatting to her daddy.

This little girl was carrying one of those play ELC knives, and daddy was saying it was gold to which the little girl responded that it wasn't gold it was brown, it couldn't be gold. It struck me that this girl, Lotties age, knew what the colour gold was, knew that gold was also a precious metal, and could basically have a conversation and argue the point with her dad.

Made me smile and made me sad at the same time.
all colours are 'lelo' (yellow) to Lotbags. I know we'll get there and what does it matter but sometimes the difference in her and her NT peers seems so huge you wonder how you'll ever get there, how the gap will ever be bridged.

It says in the report "Charlotte presents as a confident, chatty little girl, with many engaging mannerisms. She shows curiosity and interest in her surroundings and is assertive about expressing her needs and wants'. Which is lovely. But it's the words delayed, reduced, only able to concentrate for 5 mins, finds it difficult to pronounce, needs help, shows no awareness and so on that just leave me feeling a bit down in the mouth tonight.

A liitle boy in her class came up to me this morning, all excited to see her, and said to me "I heard her talk yesterday". How lovely but at the same time how sad.

Sometimes being the odd one out, the novelty, the cute kid that can't walk or talk ... well it just hurts a bit. Sometimes it would be nice not to feel.... 'special' iykwim.

Sorry, self-indulgent waffle that I'm sure you'll allow me, and understand even, but self indulgent all the same.

Tomorrow will be a better day, I do, after all have a fab kid and we're getting some great support so what is there to moan about really?
The answer is nothing! Just that sometimes, every now and then it feels crap being different, it feels crap that your child needs so much help, it feels crap that she, that we stick out from the crowd, that she's a novelty, that she can't talk, that she can't walk...............

Okay, I'm done.
Thanks for listening, TC x

[ThomCat]

PPH, it's nice to know you're there in that case and I shall feel warm in the knowledge that you're around, and I really do mean that quite sincerely, strange as it may seem, TC x

[princesspeahead]

oooh! I can be your warmandfuzzyandsurprisinglyclassy stalker!

[ThomCat]

You've got a deal!

Have an urge to eat smiley face potato things now and a cream cheese sandwich, , nothing personal, but keep distracted.

[SleepyJess]

Thank you PPH! I was very knackered when I wrote it.. perhaps I should right my OU essays very late at night.. might get higher grades..

You lot have helped me a lot too.. will never forget me first (stressed) post and all the lovely replies that put me back on my feet again.. and you guys had never even heard of me then!

Love to all

SJ x

[SleepyJess]

write not right LMAO!!!!

[mizmiz]

Can I just add some comments about what YOU are contributing to make the world a better and brighter place for children with SN Thomcat??

As well as being so kind and funny and loving, you are obviously rather hip with a glamorous job and a 'happening' lifestyle. (Gallivanting to NY, and girlie w/ends in Brighton are just two of the antics I recall off the top of my head.)

Again, years ago, the parents of children with SN were self sacrificing drudges, with no life who dressed their children in frumpy clothes. ( I am summing up the sentiment, not stating facts obviously!!)
It really makes a difference when people see the families of kids with SN as being trendy/hip/adventurous/up for it. May be shallow to say it, but it's true, if only for some dullards to realise that there are people with SN everywhere.

One of the children I work with has PMLD. His parents both have very glamorous jobs in television, always look fantastic, have a lovely home and so on, and I can see that people view them all with admiration and some envy.

Another family have a child with Autism who goes walking/climbing/camping/travelling abroad. His Autism is NOT allowed to become an issue. We all look forward to hearing what he has been up to at the start of every term.Far more than 90% of the people around here mouldering in front of their tvs.

Do you get my drift????

[ThomCat]

Bloody hell SJ, that's the first time I've seen that. Wish I'd been one of the people to post Thinking of something to say............................................................... I feel humble..........................................................I'm glad you found mumsnet. i'm glad mumsnet found you.

[ThomCat]

Oh mizmiz, I'm a laugh inside type of person but that had me laughing at loud and yes, actually I really, really get what you are saying about it not just happening to to older frumpy mums wiuth jesus sanels and socks with stranfge short fringed hair and home made skirts etc. L&LofL

[chonky]

LOL mizmiz & TC

[princesspeahead]

God SleepyJess, I don't know what to say... [Thomcat style pause]
My ds1 has congenital hypothyroidism so if you ever want to discuss anything about the management of that, I'm VERY happy to... but as for all the rest you just have my enormous respect...

[ThomCat]

What is that PPH, are you in the mood to explain?

[ThomCat]

maybe I should have just googled it but .....

[ThomCat]

maybe I should have just googled it but .....

[mizmiz]

Soo glad you girls got it!!
(LOL at jesus sandal and fringe comment.)
One more thing-on home visits I make a special effort to look nice. Wear smart clothes,polish shoes,good jewellery and so on, 'cos these families deserve this, not some government drudge with a clipboard, chewed biro,coffee breath and furrowed brow.

[cazzybabs]

SJ - WOW. You have a lot to deal with - and time to post of MN and do an OU course.

[chonky]

mizmiz, you're funny

[ThomCat]

Just did google it and sounds like Lottie has it! Well has loads of the syptons and we have to keep pur eye on her thyroid function.

[princesspeahead]

born without a thyroid. which produces thyroxine, which regulates metabolism, brain development, growth.... untreated it was known as (can hardly bear to type it) cretinism (augh!). With treatment (thyroxin replacement daily for life in the form of tablets) - completely NT. It is what they look for when they do the heelprick test on newborns.

And do I feel guilty that my son's MASSIVE potential developmental and physical problems have been completely averted by taking one tiny, white pill a day? I do, slightly. And very humble when I hear of others to can't, and to whom that is some amazing dream concept....

[ThomCat]

LOL mizmiz, I make an effort to get as much cleavage on show as possible, but nthat's just me generally!!!!!!

[ThomCat]

What tiny white pill, or shall I google again?
Guilt shouldn't be a part of your life, but I understand. I feel guilty about a lot of things when I allow myself to go there

[ThomCat]

Oh and sorry, born without a thyroid, I didn't get that, I read it quickly so I could get back to posting to you, I just read the symptons and it seemed like Lottie had lots of the symptons.

[mizmiz]

TC, gather that you were in (correct me if I'm wrong) Junior Pregnancy&Baby? Which issue was it?

[princesspeahead]

the little white pill is thyroxine! so it isn't really medication, it is replacement. he just takes orally what he would make himself if he had a thyroid.
needs blood checks every 4-6mths or so to make sure his dosage keeps up with his size, and that is about it.
if you are going to be born without anything, the thyroid is pretty much the nicest and most manageable thing to be born without, it seems to me!!!

[ThomCat]

I was babes yes, it was Willows work of art so to speak, the one that has been out a few weeks now, has a delicious B&W close up of a baby's face. Willow did an amazing job. I'll scan & email it to you on Monday if you want, just email me through mumsnet.

[pixiefish]

Hugs thomcat- you're a super mum and agree with mizmiz that you're a very trendy go- getting positive role model (If I can say that without offending)