Fri night too tired for....

[signandsmile]

hi everyone! chezsign has been headless chooksville this week.

finished teaching school basic signs, (they have been brill) made them certificates and arranged to do a surprise presentation in assembly. got whole school signing, good work, well done, and giving a waved round of applause. So sweet!

ds been into school with other newbies for a visit, (been in before, but on own.) met a 'nice' friendly mummy and swapped numbers to meet for coffee, so at least mummy is feeling a bit less insecure. Ds takes it all in stride. !

Will have to start to make all the 'thanks for having him' pressies with ds next week.... (pre-school, portage and special needs group, groups of workers and one to ones...)

How have all your weeks gone??

[creatovator]

Just reading back over posts to catch up.

Sign if I was the fainting type, I think I would have when he put his hands on my face to check my sinuses. Putting it down to me not completely recovered yet. Not like me to go so weak at all .

[moosemama]

Becaroooo, congratulations of the house move. Its doable in 3 weeks - we've managed it twice - but its not much fun and very stressful. Good luck, hope it all goes smoothly.

Hi dietcokegirl, sounds like things are going well educationally, iyswim.

I have to be really strict with myself, as once I give in the whole diet tends to go out of the window and I start craving junk. Fortunately, the Weightwatchers cake slice was horrid, so I am still on track at the moment. I also have such a lot of weight still to lose that I'm having to see it as a long term thing and focus on the end goal. (I'm hoping to buy something gorgeous to wear for our vintage/mad hatters tea party 20th anniversary (25 years together) garden party next July.) Last time I weighed myself (a week ago) I was two pounds off losing my first stone, so that's helping spur me onwards.

I couldn't cope with the idea of quorn and steamed veg tonight, so I made myself a garlic, ginger and tamari stir fry instead. Have just scoffed it in front of Ace of Cakes (I love that show) and am now feeling overstuffed.

What does everyone do for end of year teacher gifts? I'm making and decorating cupcakes for my dss' teachers - still not 100% what design, but I'm doing 4 each for class teachers, 1 each for TAs and other staff the dcs wanted to give to and they're all being presented in handbag shaped cupcake boxes that I found last week (except for the male maths teacher that is, he's having a simple white cupcake box). I thought I might send a boxful into the inclusion team as well, as ds's inclusion teacher, her boss and their secretaries have been lovely - particularly the secretary who was so sweet and supportive she made me cry all over her.

[creatovator]

Moose - sounds like you're doing really well on the diet. I'm just trying to eat healthily before going on hols in 2 weeks. Managing to get a bit of exercise having just bought a Wii with bday money at reduced price. Doing Just Dance most days. Finding it fun.

For teacher pressies I try to get the kids to make something. Even if it's just decorating a box and putting some sweets in. The cup cake idea sounds great though.

[Becaroooo]

moose Yes, its going to be a nightmare - added to that we are on hols for a week from next week!!!!!!

[creatovator]

Becaroo - Where you going? Somewhere nice?

[Becaroooo]

Back to the village I am from and where ds1 now goes to school.
Am excited, but a LOT to do!!!!

[creatovator]

Sounds great . I lived in a village between the age of 3 yrs and 8 yrs. Really liked it. Lovely to be part of a community.

[FickleFreckle]

Glad to hear some positive news as well as the ongoing battles :) (for the positive news, :( for the battles that is)

I am feeling really miserable after a horrible encounter with headmistress and class teacher (SENCO was pleasant and informative though). I tried to be neutral and polite but I could feel the hostility coming off them in waves. I feel bewildered, hurt and insulted. I'm also frustrated because after confirming with PP ds is entitled to only 12 hours extra support a week and not any 1:1 support; school cannot work with me to keep records of ds' behaviour to identify potential triggers; school say he will not get a statement and existing support is not only adequate but above and beyond the call of duty. This after threatening a not-quite 5 year old with exclusion. Oh, and of course the veiled allusions to my "accessing support" ie. "you're the problem". They have always been so nice so why the sudden unpleasantness?

I am seriously thinking about home-schooling as it seems the system is just not right for my ds. Oh well. Rant over. I'm trying to put it behind me but coffee is not quite as effective as wine for that and I've run out of chocolate...

[creatovator]

Fickle - How awful . Have some of my chocolate and we've got some wine too - will open a bottle for you.

[FickleFreckle]

aw thanks creatovator - virtual chocolate and wine definitely better than none! I am wondering about getting a CAF assessment - anyone had any experience of those? are they worth it? or should I just try to switch off for a bit and think of something frivolous? I think I may actually be developing an obsession. I can't think of anything else besides SEN provision! I'm as bad as ds with his musical instruments and flags!

[TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission]

fickle, have you thought about applying for a statement yourself? It seems to be a standard line from schools to tell parents they don't stand a chance of getting a statement for their child when that isn't necessarily the case. I have some gin and ice cream going, just don't tell moose

[creatovator]

Fickle - what does CAF stand for?

[moosemama]

Oi, Ninja - I heard that!

[creatovator]

Ah! Ninja - Must have said it too loud

[moosemama]

Fickle that sounds horrible - this system is so crap, it seems to be designed to set us up as 'them and us' rather than being able to work together.

You have all the virtual wine, gin, chocolate and ice-cream you like.

I agree with Ninja, its definitely worth considering applying yourself - schools regularly trot out that line to put you off. We were told the same by our school, but since then, the new inclusion teacher, her boss and new SENCO all agree we have a strong case.

[TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission]

what?

[creatovator]

He he he

[moosemama]

[FickleFreckle]

NinjaGoose I am umming and aaahhing about this - am really intimidated by paperwork and feeling about a foot high atm but I guess I will just have to get over it (am dyspraxic with a long history of administrative muddles - confided this to teacher and hence delicate references by headmistress to "accessing support to observe the protocols"...) Gin and tonic sounds great to me...takes me back to days of being young, beautiful and slim (well compared to now that is ) -and carefree other than boyfriend troubles (that's another story!) Moosemama I am trying to diet too...but am a living mockery of my own menu plans at present. Virtual icecream actually has negative calories though. Fact. I've read a study about it somewhere.

creatovator CAF is common assessment framework - it's an enormous long document which is supposed to pull everything together with everyone who is involved with your child. I think the school said something positive about it. I need to find out more though - sounds like it could be useful in future if only for record-keeping but am feeling a bit bemused atm...Hey! I've just explained my first acronym! Is this a milestone of some kind?

[TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission]

fickle, if parent partnership are any good where you are they may well advise on the paperwork you need and there's always plenty of advice here should you decide that's what you want to do.

[FickleFreckle]

moosemama I agree the system pits parents and professionals against each other, there is so little flexibility and so little funding. I was horrified to find out how little School Action+ actually entitles you to.

In addition to the crap system I do find - not just in this instance - that there are certain expectations of "mums" - when you do learn the jargon, do research, try to come up with ideas and so on it almost seems to wind people up more - as if you don't know your place. Or am I just paranoid?

I feel encouraged re: statement now. But I can admit here (after trying to stay calm and collected) that I am really petrified of doing it. Still, I felt that way about filling out the child tax credit forms and I managed to get over that one, which is just as well as we'd be bankrupt by now otherwise!

[moosemama]

Negative calories - now I like that idea!

I totally understand the intimidation and loss of confidence with it all. I'm only just getting past that stage and still have regular wobbles. I actually used to be really good at admin and organisation, but now have cognitive problems which mean I'm brutally aware that I no longer have those skills. I have to wait for a good day to sort paperwork and files etc and find it easier to keep everything on the computer than deal with actual physical paperwork.

I spend much of my time bemused too, the SEN system is such a huge animal and seems to almost have a life of its own that consumes you if you don't fight it and make sure you maintain some degree of balance in your life.

I've decided to calm down on it all over the summer and gear up again a couple of weeks before we go back. I've seriously had enough at this point and am desperate for a break. I was just thinking today that I can't remember the last time I was without at least one dc - I think it was when dd was 5 months old and we went out for the night - she's two and a half now!

[creatovator]

Fickle - thanks for the explanation. Things seem to work differently in Scotland and we have different terms for everything.

Regarding support, I used to feel threatened when the school mentioned it, but I asked for an assessment for DS and got a social worker. This was a great support for a while, though 2 years on we're still waiting for Direct Payments .

Can understand you feeling small with school doing what they did and they know the system well. You're not small though - you've got far more power than you think in terms of legislation. Have you thought of an advocate as well?

[FickleFreckle]

ninja, that is comforting to know...PP seem very helpful but are rushed off their feet - all four of them! - I know this sounds like something out of Terry Pratchett but actually it's just because the council in their wisdom have cut the staff to 2 people. Including admin.

[moosemama]

I think you are right about them thinking you don't know your place. Not in all schools, or all professionals, but it does seem to be very common.

I am still petrified of going for a statement, even though it is happening and I have stood up to both the school and inclusion team to say I want to submit the request myself. Fortunately it worked out well, the new SENCO is great and we have agreed to work as a team (head of inclusion support/SENCO/me) to try and produce a watertight application for SA.

Doesn't help that I bolshily snapped at the last SENCO in front of everyone that I didn't care if she said ds wouldn't get a statement, I would apply anyway and take it to tribunal if necessary. I honestly don't know what came over me, think I was finally tipped over the edge by her attitude and continuous rolling out the LEA party line.