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Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler.

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Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler.

Sleep

Anyone used a sleep consultant - wondering whether to invest

37 replies

catsarenice · 30/12/2016 08:39

DS is 7 months and is terrible at night. Used to be able to bf him to sleep then put him in cot (I know, I know) but now he will not stay settled in cot or if he eventually does it will be for absolute maximum of 2 hours but usually a couple of minutes maybe 10. He must've had about 3 hours sleep max last night. He also won't nap in his cot - has to be in pram or car. He doesn't always need bf back to sleep just wants cuddles and he sometimes let DP do it. Really at my wit's end with sleep deprivation and need a solution. Is a sleep consultant worth it? Not willing to leave him to cry himself to sleep beyond leaving for a couple of mins to see if he settles.

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Purplebluebird · 30/12/2016 21:42

Sarah Ockwell-Smith is one who does online consultantions. Also has a "gentle sleep" book.

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Purplebluebird · 30/12/2016 21:43

She is firmly against any crying.

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HeCantBeSerious · 30/12/2016 23:20

Which book did you get, OP?

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stillwantrachelshair · 30/12/2016 23:56

When asking this question, you need to find out how long ago the family had the sleep consultant in and whether it worked long term. Four or five friends used sleep consultants &, whilst they had initial success, it only lasted until the next cold/teething/holiday to knock things out of routine and then the whole house of cards came tumbling down and they were back at square one again, although less exhausted than they were as they had had some sleep in the meantime.

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catsarenice · 31/12/2016 00:21

The Baby Sleep Guide by Stephanie Moddell. She mentions all the different methods, even the ones she doesn't seem to agree with such as cry it out but does seem keen on gradual withdrawal. Seems kinder on paper cos still in the room and even touching/patting/shushing baby, but when they're still screaming and you know picking them up will stop them being upset it still seems harsh! I think if I could get him to take a lunchtime nap in his cot it would be a massive improvement so think I'm going to start with that one but not until schools go back so I can get in a proper routine. So glad I haven't got to go back to work for a few months - hats off to people who have loads of night wakings and then have to go to work

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FreddoFrog · 31/12/2016 02:49

Could you use your sleep book to help formulate a plan during the day for what you will do at night? Make a plan and stick to it. Things tend to go out the window at 3am and all feels hopeless but it will go better with a plan that you worked out ahead of time.

Consistency is key here.

Also, you have a window of opportunity now for sleep training as baby is relatively stable (developmentally) at 7 months. Soon baby will develop separation anxiety and that would be a really difficult time to sleep train. If you and baby can't get the hang of things now, I would wait until baby is 12 months and try again. 12 months is a good, stable time to sleep train.

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catsarenice · 31/12/2016 03:04

Thank you Freddo that sounds like a good plan. Going to give it a good go next week when back to normal routine and all coughs/colds/chicken pox have cleared up

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FreddoFrog · 31/12/2016 03:21

Sounds promising! Best of luck

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LapinR0se · 31/12/2016 08:24

I used a sleep consultant for my baby and I liked her so much that I ended up working for her (just doing admin, I have no sleep consultancy expertise).
I have seen her help hundreds of families and there has not been one case where the interventions failed.
There is crying though. Anyone who tells you that you can break long standing sleep associations and ingrained habits without crying is mistaken.
However a good sleep consultant will know how to manage crying to create minimum distress for the child and parent. This plus aftercare support is what you are paying for.

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cansu · 31/12/2016 08:28

If you can afford it and just want someone to reassure you on the right way then do it. However there us no magic wand. There will be sone crying while your dc gets used to sleeping without cuddles. If you cant face this at all then you will have to get used to being sleep deprived.

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catsarenice · 31/12/2016 08:31

He slept better last night - only woke 3 times, gave him the breast back to sleep and he let me put him back in his cot. Had baby Mozart playing all night so perhaps that was it!

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ImprovingMyMH · 31/12/2016 08:46

still, we used a sleep consultant ~5 years ago. She helped us to stop DS BFing to sleep, to transfer his naps from the car or pram to the cot, and to get him to sleep in his cot all night. DS has gone through different sleep phases since then, but these weren't too bad.