Great wise MNers, what are the REAL pitfalls of year 7 - for a (PFB) child with AS?

[MrsS3]

We're doing the obvious stuff, uniform (done) numerous visits done and ongoing, form / tutor group with a few familiar faces (done) and photos of the teachers he'll need to remember.
However, I can't help but feel that it's like buying a cot and a pram for a new baby before realising you've not got a clue how to deal with it in reality and the actual practicalities are a whole lot different. Possibly a rubbish analogy but it makes sense to me . I don't want to have got the kit and the book but entirely missed the bits that will really matter. Any tips?

[MrsShrek3]

Viva girls can be horrible
Ds has made himself a new friend already (through transition) and they're both going to go to the Learning Base at lunchtimes - so avoiding the 'playground' (or whatever it is at high school!) for the first few days. One of the very few people from his school going to the same high school is the primary Class Bully DS figures at least he knows about it - the devil you know and all that.

[lirael]

We have named everything, practised uniform, got the stretchy key rings, the plastic wallets - the only thing left to do is mould the gum shield! (I am leaving this to DH, who is an ex-rugby player). DS1 super-cool about the whole thing which is making me feel much more relaxed. This thread has been brilliant for support and preparation ideas - thank you all. DS1 starts on Wednesday - will be checking in to see how everyone gets on. (Its Sphil btw - have namechanged).

[VivaLeBeaver]

I've just realised I haven't idea how to tie a tie. The YouTube tutorials make it look really difficult. Agghhhh. Got to teach dd tomorrow!

[MrsShrek3]

@ tie - thought I'd be spending the six weeks (at least) teaching ds but joy of joys, discovered in June that they have clip on ties. For everyone.
Ever heard (after putting tie round neck & holding 'wide' end) round once, round again, up to your nose, down to your toes?

[MrsShrek3]

Viva, the "round" bit is snake going round a tree downwards style - "up" is behind the tie and down is through the middle and makes the knot. We manage to get sen 7yos to do it with this
That probably doesnt make a word of sense

[funchum8am]

Hi everyone, I'm a teacher and head of faculty in a secondary and reading the thread has set me thinking through how starting secondary must look from your perspective.

One tip I have is to see if you can get the email addresses of each teacher your child has, and email them introducing yourself and letting them know that you will be supporting your child with their h/w etc. Obviously you don't want your child to be singled out so you could say you're happy to be alerted IF there seem to be any problems with the punctuality/quality of the work etc. If these things are nipped in the bud early while ALL pupils are struggling to get used to it, it will be easier than if problems have to be addressed later.

Most teachers in my school are relieved to have parents bring up potential issues at the earliest opportunity (whether their child is on the autistic spectrum or not) so they know who to really watch out for that bit extra to make sure they're fulfilling their true potential.

Also, as a middle manager I'd always be keen to hear if a particular teacher was not communicating helpfully enough or eg not giving a child enough time to write down the full details of homework tasks (eg you are seeing "do thing" or "finish sheet" etc; usually this means an inexperienced rather than an unhelpful teacher and so can remedied relatively easily - and you are doing a favour to every other child that teacher sets work for) so having the head of each department/faculty's email address can also be helpful.

It sounds like you're all incredibly supportive parents and I wish my pupils had such thoughtful, thorough and organised parents. I wish you all the best of luck for your children's start to secondary school life!

[lirael]

Ah Funchum, you sound lovely! I hope there are many like you at Ds's new school. We have taken the decision not to raise Ds's dyspraxia before he starts - his primary teacher and SENCo assured me they told the secondary school and he has progressed so well that we want to see how he goes. I can tell you that this goes against everything I have ever done before!. But we will be keeping a close eye on how he's doing with organisation, writing down homework etc - emails of teachers is a really good idea.

One day to go - DS has just written a list on his phone of the things he has to do before school. It says: get up, have shower, feed cat, have breakfast, delouse ( by which I think he means do face, hair, teeth ), get dressed, free time!!!

[VivaLeBeaver]

We managed with the tie tying. Thank God because she still can't do shoe laces!

She was so shaky this morning though and had some tears before she left. Hoping she comes home with a big smile.

[coppertop]

Just dropping in to wish everyone the best of luck for Yr7.



Ds starts Yr8 this week but it only seems like 5 minutes since he started secondary school.

[MrsShrek3]

Good luck all - hope to hear some news as to how it's going... DS starts tomorrow. So excited he can't sleep

[VivaLeBeaver]

My dd came home very happy, she enjoyed her day. Big relief! Good luck o people staring tomorrow.

[lirael]

All fine here - had a phone call at 3.10 to say he'd be home a bit later as he was walking back via the games shop with his new friend! Managed to get a certain amount of info out of him when he got home before he became immersed in the murky world of Minecraft in which the only language appears to be grunts .

[KitKatGirl1]

Ds started Monday. Has survived so far, including triple games today. Was brave enough to speak to the Principal when he got lost, but hasn't made any friends yet though says he doesn't want to...Has done the bits of homework straight away so far but is very, very tired.
He also announced that he's pleased that his locker number is his favourite number from the Fibonacci sequence (sp?)...that's my Aspie!

[MrsShrek3]

All sounding good so far for everyone
Ds reallyenjoyed his first day. He is very pleased with locker number, keyring etc - but can't actually find the locker to put the padlock on, apparently it's in the middle of "Locker City" but he likes the number, so that's alright then
He loves the uniform and the planner has been shown to everyone, much to our amazement. Looking promising

[lirael]

First PE this morning - this will be the difficult time for DS1 as he is sooo slow at getting changed. Top button of shirt giving particular problems. The actual PE won't be as bad, I don't think - he's a trier, which helps. That's if the lesson hasn't finished by the time he gets into his kit .

Forgot to say that both buttons had dropped off his blazer by the time he got home yesterday, but so had his friend's - the result of doing the buttons up and then walking to school with a rucksack on your back!

[VivaLeBeaver]

Dd has PE today as well. She was trying to ram her PE bag into her school bag as apparently that's what everyone does. It wouldn't fit so she's gone off in a huff saying she will get teased now.

She's got a normal sized gola bag for school. PE kit is in a duffle bag and is trainers, trousers and polo shirt. How on earth does everyone else manage to fit it all in?

[JustGettingByMum]

I'm wondering the same! DD has PE today too, I think she will need to carry 2 bags or squash all her new exercise books that we spent last night covering in sticky back plastic.

[lirael]

I managed to get Ds1 a rucksack that has a compartment at the bottom for shoes - result! So now he can get the rest of his kit into the rucksack - but not at the same time as his lunch. Which has added fuel to his argument that he should have school lunches ( we had said no originally as too expensive and not particularly healthy). We have compromised and he will have school lunches on the days he has PE...

Bit that he appears to have been put into the 3rd set out of 4 for Maths - he got a level 5 in SATs and primary teacher said he was fairly strong.

[MrsShrek3]

Lirael, where did you get that bag?

We have the same debate, ds has PE shorts and top, footy boots, trainers and socks in his bag, all squashed. And he reckons he's getting the lot into his rucksack. Not if he's planning on taking his lunch and Famous Waterproof (see top of thread, sigh) he's done well enough to keep track of all his stuff (for two whole days, lol) but TWO bags? Eeeek!

[Startailoforangeandgold]

Lirael Secondary school setting can be barmy.

Personally I'd question it, you will probably get fobbed off by we're testing/doing CATs or something similar.

However, it does mean you won't get a blank stare next time you raise it again at the first parents evening.

They did put DD1 up for Maths and Science (3to2) and she's now at the top of 2.

She's dyslexic and socially inept. She is also very bright and very quick at understanding things. It's just primary maths with tables and mental tests is not dyslexia friendly.

[VivaLeBeaver]

Lireal, dd has been put in a bottom set and her friends in a higher set. Dd was the only one out of them though to pass her 11plus so I'm rather confused.

[lirael]

MrsShrek - it's a Slazenger rucksack from Sports Direct.

As far as setting goes, it now appears that he's in the third set of four for everything, even Science, which is his best subject. But they are CATs testing in a couple of weeks so things may change after that. He got 5s in Maths, Science and Reading in SATs, 4 for writing (with 4 overall for English). The annoying thing is that History, Geog, Art, Drama, Music, RE and IT are ALL set on the basis of English, which scuppers him good and proper. And I think is pretty barmy.

Having said all that, he's not bothered. The new friend he's made (who he describes as a clone of himself ) is in all the same groups and he's keen to stay with him. I can see that they may have thought he'd do better in slightly smaller, slower paced groups as his recording can be slow. So we'll just have to see - will wait til after CATS.

[MrsShrek3]

ds's "setting" story virtually identical to yours. Scarily so.

[lirael]

Wouldn't it be weird if he was DS1's clone friend? . You don't live near us I suppose? . W Country?

[IndigoBell]

My DS has had 2 days at secondary school, and I'm blown away by how good it's going.

Obviously he hates the teachers and the kids and the uniform. Tucking his shirt in is torture. The bell hurts his ears.

But he is fine. He really is.

He's signed up for rugby and for war hammer.


I told the SENCO I didn't want him to have any extra help. I told the primary school before their transition meeting I dont want them to make a big deal out of his Aspergers. I wanted him to have a fresh start. I wanted him to stop using his Aspergers to get out of doing stuff.

But the primary HT did tell the secondary SENCO he needed support.

So on the first day someone took him out of class to talk to him about making friends and aspergers etc. DS was not impressed.

Apparently this is going to be a regular thing. Although I'm sure DS will talk his way out of it soon. :)