Is "gosh, she's really attractive" appropriate for a 45 yo to say about a 14 yo?

[GreyHolly]

Just that please.

[Crumbs1]

its probably just a comment on someone on television as opposed to a perky view of a child. I am older and have certainly said similar, " Gosh, they're very beautiful" or " His a nice looking lad". I've never felt anything remotely sexual for anyone much younger than me......but then I'm a woman and on this site all men are considered dodgy, abusive or deviant.

[Lovingitlovingit]

Some posters are saying 'attractive' is different from pretty or handsome.

[NicolasFlamel]

justkeepswimming calm down..
My (mixed race) kid regularly gets compliments about his wild head of curls. He's bored of it being mentioned now. Me thinks someone is projecting their own experiences a bit much..?

[Nubia66]

Wow Jeustkeep, that's a bit harsh! And this is coming from a black woman with 'nappy' hair.
OP, I think you're reading far too much into his comment, unless there is a back story. I've certainly described one of my son's friends as attractive at around that age and I'm certainly not pervy. I'm left wondering whether you don't like him making complimentary comments about other females as a whole but that at least you can legitimise your objection on this occasion.

[Nubia66]

•Justkeep

[AtSea1979]

Unless he followed it up with something more inappropriate I wouldn't worry about it. Did you not ask "what do you mean"? Since you seem alarmed by it?

[LittleWitch]

For me "attractive" is about more than just looks. People can be attractive without being especially good looking iyswim. If I was commenting specifically on someone's looks alone, I would say "beautiful " or "pretty", "gorgeous " or just "good looking ". In my mind "attractive " is a well preserved, well dressed, older woman.

I do think it's slightly cringey for a bloke to make that remark about a young teen.

[trulybadlydeeply]

So this was one of the coaches in the programme, and remark was about one of the contestants? I don't personally see an issue with that, as it was presumably just a reaction to when he turned round at the end of the song. I think the word attractive can imply some sexual ferlings, but in this context I would not take it to do so.

[trulybadlydeeply]

Or have I misunderstood, was this the person you were watching with?

[LionsOnTour]

JustKeeps

Deary me, what a crazy response to my post. How dare you suggest that my comments about my DDs blond hair suggest that I think kids who don't have European features are ugly. WTF are you on about!!! 🤷🏻‍♀️

I hope you are just posting goady and unpleasant comments for fun as I would hate to think you genuinely believe what you posted.

[justkeepswimmin]

Me thinks someone is projecting their own experiences a bit much..?

What experiences? I'm not black

[crunched]

I was saying, just the other day, that I thought the girl in the AA ad (Tina Turner song? You know the one ?) was such an attractive child.
Surely that is the correct use of the word? She is full of character and attracts your attention.

[NotYoda]

IT DEPENDS

[Hulababy]

Very much depends on how said and how it fit in to other things.

To me the word attractive doesn't have any sexual connotations.

And it sounds more bland than beautiful, pretty, stunning , handsome etc.

I am sure the vast majority of adult men have the ability to recognise that a young girl or young boy is attractive/pretty etc without meaning anything more than that.

I bet a woman wouldn't be given the same concerns if she commented on the young girl (or young boy) to say he was attractive/handsome.