I did cheat on my husband and the guy I slept with wants to be a friend now.

[user1490951335]

This guy knew I was married so why now he is feeling guilty and doesn't want to be attached? I m broken-hearted cause I did cheat on my husband who loves me and I feel angry to bits cause it is not the great feeling to be abandoned after you trusted someone and had intimate contact risking losing lots in your life. Should I ignore him and keep the rest of my proud I have left or should accept what did happen and stay friend with him or turn my back and kick his out of my life for good.

[CotesDeGroan]

just fucken leave; it's a lot easier than having an affair

That's easy to say when you're not stuck in an abusive relationship.

[SleepingTiger]

A "wee sparkle". Is that like a piss?

[Adora10]

People love to give adulterers a virtual kicking on MN without considering that maybe the "guilty" party's married life is genuinely miserable or even abusive.

2 wrongs don't make a right; retaliating against a shit person by turning yourself into one is not the answer; just fucken leave; it's a lot easier than having an affair.

[PovertyPain]

I strongly suspect you wouldn't give a shit about hurting your husband if the OM decided to stay with you, op. You're only staying with your DH until someone 'better' comes along. Do your poor DH a favour and leave him so he can hopefully be happy with someone that loves him back.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

I hope you used contraception .

[MyheartbelongstoG]

Imagine if op were a man.....

[user1490951335]

Riversleep
you are absolutely right

[JaneA1]

I think you cannot be serious with all of this you are sharing right now ...

[Riversleep]

Do you think you cheated because he is a lovely man who loves you more than you love him? Sometimes people find that a bit dull and enjoy the chase. I bet that's exactly how your OM felt. He liked the forbidden fruit of shagging a married woman, now he's off on his new conquest. You not being able to have children has nothing to do with you being 'meant to be' with your husband. There are incredibly toxic relationships that produce children and people who couldn't have children who are together for years. If you are unhappy, you need to leave the marriage and let him find someone who loves him.

[ComputerUserNumptyTwit]

I'd feel exactly the same if a man posted about being unfaithful. No sexist double standards from me.

[ComputerUserNumptyTwit]

Nobody is trying to make excuses! Although it's true that sometimes people in miserable, possibly abusive relationships end up falling into affairs or ONSs. There are unscrupulous individuals who'll target people in those circs precisely because they are vulnerable.

This doesn't appear to be the case here however.

[Adora10]

Totally agree Renaissance; at least I think the same of both sexes - cunts basically but I am sick of reading when a woman is shagging on the side, it's ok cos well she's having a tough time, but if it's ever a man, he's the devil reincarnated!

[Renaissance2017]

It's incredulous that people are looking for excuses as to why the OP cheated.

If an OP says her husband cheated he is automatically a dick/wanker/ any other abusive name and there is never an excuse.

[user1490951335]

TedEriksen
he is not abusive person, he will never do anything to hurt me.

[Adora10]

I've been with my partner 15 years not even married but have found it easy to stay faithful because I love him and believe in fidelity; sounds like you don't have either of those feelings; it's not enough if he loves you, the love has to be mutual; imo, anyone having an affair can't possibly be happy and in love with their partner.

Leave him OP; it's a nicer cleaner way to be than having sex on the side with your lover.

You have control over what you do, it's not the guy's fault either.

[Adora10]

See you are still full of excuses.

[Adora10]

Of course, if you are married or in a relationship, the best thing is to walk away rather than get involved but I do understand that sometimes your feelings and emotions get carried away.

Not the best thing, the only thing, otherwise you're basically acting like a total tramp having sex with a man who knows you're married; not nice is it.

[Bob19701]

Until the OP responds we will never know if her DH will kick 'seven bells ' out of her ..I am sure the majority of men wouldn't behave like that .

[ComputerUserNumptyTwit]

It depends on what they do with that truth.

I just think it's unwise to try to convince someone to tell their spouse about an infidelity unless you're pretty certain that they're not going to have seven bells kicked out of them.

[Bob19701]

I think any person wife or husband who has been cheated on has the right to know the truth ..

[Holly3434]

Abandoned probably because the sex was crap on offer he took it and left. You've done your sufferings DH a favour in the long run

[ComputerUserNumptyTwit]

I think any advice to tell the husband needs to be caveated, that's all.