Met boyfriend of 2 months online. I was initially attracted to his profile because he sounded unmaterialistic and grew up in a rural area, while I am a city girl who wants to eventually end up in a rural spot. My relatives grew up doing very similar work to him & so I spent a lot of Summers in places that are similar to his family home (his parents are very well off, he has family heirlooms handed down from grandparents etc).
Meanwhile my grandparents were working class people and my parents both have degrees with a middle class salary. My parents divorced when I was young & mum has always remained in what was really just meant to be the 'starter' house for my parents. This woman is loaded and yet she keeps living in an area that is quite run down. She complains about how she has 'always wanted a big kitchen' (which she can easily afford).
When I first met my boyfriend I thought he was very posh and doubted it would go anywhere (it felt like Bridget Jones dating Mark Darcy). But we kept on getting along better & better and now he's in love with me! In fact I can't remember anyone being so enarmoured with me in a long time & vice versa, but there is one small issue...
Lately, he has made disparaging comments about neighbourhoods that are not so dissimilar from where I grew up ('Not a very nice area is it?'). Although I've never grown up in a council house, my mother's house and grandparents houses are former council homes. So, effectively, he is insulting the way I've grown up.
The further problem is that I avoid visiting my mother because I don't like the house I grew up in either. Despite having a lot of money, my mother often started projects in the house and left them unfinished (walls half papered, large cracks in walls etc). This meant I was always ashamed to bring friends home. Throughout the years our relatives complained about why she didn't invite them over. Even her friends have been shocked by the state of the house because she seems so well put together in person!
My grandparents house, although smallsh, is where I feel most at home. I refuse to feel ashamed of my family and in fact I don't feel that way until my boyfriend makes these comments! My grandmother has told me to invite him over but how can I/why should I if this is how he feels? I am even seriously doubting the relationship because of our differences. 
Despite all this we vote the same we politcally and he actually prefers to take jobs that are manual labour. I am quite academic, with a more professional job, but I like that he is not exactly like the same way although he is a smart man.
I know that my boyfriend is a good man, kind and thoughtful, but he has lived a sheltered life. He recently joked that I 'keep him in check'. I am mortified about the thought of having to bring him home, so how do I cope with his comments and about the meeting the mother part!?
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Relationships
Class differences in a relationship. How can I bring him home?
Anna533 · 07/12/2016 20:42
Oh dear, not very good at maintaining anonymity am I 
I've been keeping a low profile while writing that letter in defense of myself and my prince and all...
The thing is, how far have I come!? As I say both my parents are as educated as I am and have good salaries. It's not like I came from the gutter (aside from my mother's issues), it's just that she doesn't care about what sort of house she lives in, whether it's very presentable or even whether the area is decent.
I live in one of the nicest areas in this city on the other hand because all of that does matter to me. I'm concerned because he's come from a background of people that are preoccupied with money whereas I don't judge people based on income - I suppose I'm scared he'll decide he's better off with the types of girls he grew up with in the end! Even though I know how much I have to offer and know he is crazy about me - it's something I need to work on.
Although I think PhilomenaCatLover (sorry if misspelled!) is probably correct when saying "My own parent's home is quite posh and well done up, my DHs home is small and old. But the only thing we notice about the homes is the warmth of the people and the excellent food that comes out of the kitchen!" 
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