I don't like my son's teeth.

[Sea1402]

Hi, I don't want to be completely flamed, so didn't know where to put this. Thought relationships might be the best place.

My son is lovely, he really is and I wouldn't change him, as it wouldn't be him. However, I do admit that I don't like his teeth. Is it odd to find physical things about your children that you don't like? I feel really bad and know I'm in the minority, but I wonder if anyone else out there has ever felt the same.

[MongerTruffle]

Just realised this is a zombie thread.

[MongerTruffle]

It's almost impossible to get perfect teeth. Our dentist said that DS was one of the few children who have a correct bite, but that means that his molars are much more prone to decay so he has had to have 8 (!) fillings.

It's not really something to stress about.

[maras2]

............ ZOMBIE THREAD ............

[Saldebain]

Meh. I get you OP. DDs eyes are too close together. I don't love her any less for it and I'm not a lesser parent for noticing something odd looking about my child.

[Eliza22]

I've already posted. As I said, a 16 yr old DS. Asd, OCD, suicidalat times. He has perfect teeth. And sticky out ears. They're the least of his/our problems.

[tallwivglasses]

I'm pondering on how many parents of sn DC are having to sit on their hands at this thread.

[Oblomov16]

Ds2 has this and I'm just saddened for him. Dentist said it's just one if those things. But I don't not like his teeth. I will try and get him treatment when he's older.

[offside]

I too have white spots on my two front teeth, however, I am often told how beautiful my teeth are and as far as I'm concerned the white spots aren't noticed.

I also had a gap between my two front teeth which I could fit a 50p through, I got told I would need braces, however, by the time I was around 14 it closed up on its own.

I think you're being very unfair, particularly in an era where there is so much pressure to be 'perfect', you don't expect this pressure at home.

[KeepCoolCalmAndCollected]

I understand where you are coming from OP, and no one can help their feelings - whether you are a mother or not.
My DC has a similar thing (probably worse in that some of his enamel hasn't formed properly, and therefore exposes the inner layer which is of course softer and can therefore break).
He will very likely have to have a brace as well.
I sometimes really notice the contrast in colour, and find it quite upsetting too, but also more for him, because I worry about other children with perfectly white teeth saying nasty things to him, because I know it would cut deep (he's 10 at the moment).
We've got a very good dentist, and as someone else said up thread, when he is older they can then look at matching up the colour, which will be wonderful!
Are the white spots you mention from too much fluoride??
Your dentist must know - has he told you?
Lastly, like someone else mentioned, hopefully the contrast with your DS's teeth won't be too great as he gets older, and thinking about it, I have only see it with children.

[LobsterQuadrille]

My parents were over-invested in my weight when I was a teenager. They would have conversations with each other, not knowing that I could overhear, and make pointed comments to me. I became bulimic and even now am thin through control. My DD went through an "awkward" teenage phase and I was conscious of never giving any negative comment - I was never going to risk her self esteem going the way that mine went. She has no known hang ups and a brilliant body image, and has never considered diets (she is 19). Your DS is nine and will "grow into" his teeth as PP have said. Try to focus on his (I am sure) many positive points.

[MrsMarigold]

OP I don't think you are being unreasonable at all, although it's important not to be critical as it can be destructive to self-esteem.

Also do you have any hang-ups? I think this can be just as damaging, I say this as someone with a very pretty mother but who had body dysmorphia and bulimia, I struggle with my own self-image and am quite critical.

[SVJAA]

Our 9 yo DS will need braces when he's older, as his teeth all have gaps between them, and as his teeth are adult sized but he isn't he's at that awkward stage where they seem huge. I don't dislike them though, I'm just aware that for his own confidence we need to start saving for braces.

[dimots]

I have these white marks on my teeth but they get much less noticeable over time. I think your teeth stain over time even if only slightly and that evens up the colour. They have never bothered me anyway.

[birdybirdywoofwoof]

I think your post is a little odd op- and I don't mean to be nasty.

Most parents don't dislike their kids features- surely there is an issue here that needs exploring - perhaps with a counsellor?

DC have big noses, short legs and sticky out teeth - they're adorable, of course!

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Sparkly- I have them too, lucky for me my mum isn't shallow and if she is she's kept it to herself! It's such a non issue it's ridiculous. This thread has made me unusually cross. Be grateful it's a tiny mark on teeth OP and not anything serious. Good grief!

[SparklyMagpie]

This upsets me a little tbh!

I have patches on my 2 front teeth and bottom 2, my dentist said years ago it looks as if I may have had some trauma to my mouth when I was little. Actually I can remember when I was around 5 being sat on a bus next to my mum an I stupidly put my mouth on the metal seat bar infront and the bus went over a bump and I remember smacking my teeth

Mine are white spots an some off white an I was told I could have a crown put over them, I've just never been able to afford it

I'm 26 and to this day I still get upset and self conscious, although nobody has ever commented, it's the one thing I get really down about.

To think my mum could have ever sat there and looked at me and had those feelings would really badly hurt me

I know I'm being very personal, but it's abit sad

It doesn't change who he is

[Crispsheets]

As usual , some harsh and totally over the top replies on here to the OP.

[msrisotto]

This post does confuse me a bit. So, I don't agree that mother's should all be blinded by their children's beauty/specialness etc. You can notice objective facts about them....but the stain on the tooth? I have that too and I am vain enough to dislike my nose, watch my weight etc but the tooth? Doesn't register. It's such a tiny irrelevant thing.

[ravenmum]

Next time maybe start the thread earlier in the day and you might get a different set of answers :)

[burgundyandgoldleaves]

Lovely, why mention them at all?

unless they are filled with pus and begging to be squeezed?

[ravenmum]

Of course you don't have to like everything about your children. They are not fantasy people, they are real, so they sometimes smell bad, make horrible noises and look really funny, same as you.

If you are struggling to ignore his flaws, then, it's likely to have a reason apart from the actual flaws. Maybe he reminds you painfully of a time in your youth that you haven't really processed? Maybe you are feeling guilty about "being a bad mum" for some reason?

[Out2pasture]

children go through awkward stages and I think it's perfectly fine to discuss issues which can be treated. ears pinned, teeth veneered etc.
yes online is the way it's done but really 20 years ago you sat with friends said the same stuff over coffee and someone said....oh they fix that now
whether you or your son eventually get the dental work done at least your aware of the options.

[MrsBlennerhassett]

I think you are brave to talk about it OP and in the spirit of openness, i bet there are loads of parents who feel like that about trivial things to do with their kids.
Please dont let it worry you, it doesnt mean you dont love your child.

I remember when my son was first born his head was very strangely shaped and his face all squashed because of the way hed been stuck in the birth canal and it did really upset me and i felt terrible for it upsetting me.
Thankfully he grew into his face and i personally think he is beautiful now.

Sometimes worry about how we feel about these things can kind of make the things themselves seem worse?
When i saw my babies squashed face i used to not like it and then id feel guilty about that and so the whole thing sort of fed on itself, so i was feeling very bad whenever i saw his face.

You dont need to focus on this really. Its a small issue and can be fixed if he doesnt like it himself when hes older.
Like i said i bet there are lots of parents who feel a bit like that about something about their kids features from time to time, dont worry about it , just try not to dwell on it. x

[Cloudhopping]

Sorry OP but I find your post offensive. You need to focus on what's important in life. If I knew my mother disliked my teeth so much that she felt compelled to express it on a forum, I would be devastated.