I've done something really, really stupid and now I'm shit scared

[ReallyShouldKnowBetterAtMyAge]

NC regular poster but I'm so ashamed of how stupid I've been. I was drunk last night but that is no excuse, I honestly don't know why I did it, lonely and horney is my best bet.

I've been a single mum for 10 months now (thankfully DC is with their dad for the half term and this coming weekend) I don't get out at all what with DC and work and general lacking of friends and cash.

I logged on to one of the OLD sites I occasionally log onto, not really had much luck there either. I was quite drunk and it was late and I started talking dirty with a supposedly local guy and I gave him my address!!!

Of all the most stupid things to do and now I'm terrified he is going to turn up. I've locked all the doors and not turned front of house lights on...

I'm such an idiot. I've managed 10 months of no drunken text messages to ex and not showing myself up and then I go and do this.

I'm never going to be able to sleep again at myself.

[calamityjam]

Just tell him that the 6 kids are coming back early. That will scare him more than anything else

[SeemsLegit]

Just message him and tell him you've changed your mind. Most men are not scary weirdos who will just turn up unannounced and if he is don't open the door

[ExasperatedAlmostAlways]

I'd send a message saying I'm really sorry I was house sitting for my brother last night and was feeling sorry for myself..I shouldn't of given you his address. Iv decided to go home and make a go of things with my husband sorry for changing my mind.

[twolittleboysonetiredmum]

I really think most normal people, assuming he's normal which he most likely is, if you messaged and explained you'd been a drunken fool , would just back off. If you dont then he might just chance turning up. Or you'd worry he might. At least if you message the chances are decreased somewhat. If he dies turn up regardless, then you know he's not normal and then deal with the problem.

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

Is that all 😁 Blimey, I thought you'd shagged him in the middle of the town square or something!

There's no need to ignore him, block him or any other ridiculous thing. He SAID there was no point in carrying on if you didn't want to. Just apologise for your drunken enthusiasm & thank him for his understanding. You know, like an adult.

[fairydust181912]

I think Finola1step has the right idea.That being said, I would also;

In my opinion, send him a message saying you are very sorry, it is nothing personal, but you feel uncomfortable (its a good sign he's has already shown signs of not wanting to force you into anything) and please could he forget that you have given him your address.

Only in a small percentage of cases would the guy show up after you had asked him not to. In that case, stay inside your locked house, upstairs and call the police. That would then be justified as he was arriving unannounced after you had asked him not to (i.e. harrasment)

Most of all try and calm down x

[Czerny88]

SeemsLegit You stole my post!

[ScarlettSahara]

Yes I have just seen that last post OP and he does sound reasonable so I agree with ExtraHot. Apologise that you were drunk. Say now you are sober you realise you have made a mistake and thank him for his understanding.

[Klaptout]

I agree with Anchor, if you don't message him you will be worrying forever.
No good beating yourself up about it, the lesson has been learnt.
I'm liking the idea of a pair of big blokes boots on the doorstep, a police helmet truncheon and handcuffs on the windowsill, might not work!
I had a bloke on a dating site who was a little enthusiastic, wanted to take me out for dinner one evening.
I told him that I wasn't allowed out at night due to my tag curfew and that it cramped my style only being able to wear trackie bottoms due to the bulky tagging device, but at least I could bling them up by wearing my white stilettos, sorted I thought.
He messaged me back saying, can we do lunch instead, blocked.

[princessmi12]

I'd just say sorry I've changed my mind and would block him after.99%guarantee he won't turn up after this.In a case of unlikely 1%chance he will ,don't open the door call police straight away .

[SeemsLegit]

czerny it was the most sensible post 😂

[Mrsnoo72]

If you want to address it, I like the PPs' ideas of either saying you're married and it was a bit of drunken messaging that got out of hand but you wouldn't want your husband to find out, or saying that you were at your brother's and are now going home to patch things up with said husband, thus saying that it's not your address and a bloke lives there instead, so DON'T TURN UP.

I'd be wary of confirming that it was your address and try to put him off the scent just in case he does think of coming over.

And as everyone says - huge chances are he's a normal bloke and means you no harm and will back off when asked. Try not to worry (but don't answer door to strangers in next wee while in case?) - no point taking chances.

[ReallyShouldKnowBetterAtMyAge]

Thank you for calming me down.

I've sent him a message saying sorry but I've changed my mind.

He replied back saying he totally understands, admits he is a bit gutted and would I rather chat on here or we could whatsapp what is that?

I think I will still buy the big men's boots just incase.

[Liiinooo]

As the lovely Elsa would say 'let it go - turn away and slam the door'. You have got off lightly. In this situation silence is golden.

[MammaTJ]

Not the smartest thing you have ever done but really, no harm done!

If he turns up, just don't answer the door! Simple!

If he is persistent, then phone the police and get him removed!

[Thissameearth]

At this point I'd politely and firmly say that it had been out of character for you and you'd like to draw a line under it altogether. But then chill a bit and cut yourself a bit of slack (and think of fun things you could do in your spare time)

[OnceThereWasThisGirlWho]

Czerny Run a bath, have a glass of wine and calm down

... and light a lot of candles, leave vital doors unlocked, and curtains open. Like in horror films...

Sorry, I'll get my coat...

[Czerny88]

ThisGirl Hmm, good point...

[ReallyShouldKnowBetterAtMyAge]

Stop it grin]

We are now just chatting, he does seem really nice and has completly accepted last nigh as what it was for me, and Ive dropped don't actually live here I'm just house sitting for my brother - totally mortified etc, he is accepting it all in good grace

[TheWitchesofIzalith]

Well, that's a good result. I agree he sounds very normal and reasonable and no need to do all that hysterical stuff about buying men's boots and all sorts, wtf was that suggestion all about? Talk about over reacting.
Treating him like a normal decent adult as extrahotlatte said was totally the best way to go.

[Oddsocksgalore]

How mad would it be if you ended up going for a drink!

[PerspicaciaTick]

some people just seem ready for a barney - on both sides

[PerspicaciaTick]

Oops sorry - wrong thread, no idea how that happened

[ReallyShouldKnowBetterAtMyAge]

I'm not trusted around alcohol at the moment oddsocks

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

Yes. Perhaps stick to going for ☕️☕️

😁