I don't think I can take any more ): please advise me.

[sosickandtired]

I don't know if this is the correct topic but it's the one I usually read.

I am having an awful time at the moment, I have 2 DC ages 11 and 7. The 11 y.o has a different dad and the 7 y.o dad and I have not a very good relationship, to say the least. He has never wanted to live together and just picks and chooses, I think it's selfish and for a quite a while we've been on the verge of splitting. Stupidly we had sex twice over New Year and since i'm off my pill I took the morning after pill both times. But on 25th Jan i found out I'm pregnant. I was all over the place, but after a few days of tears and guilt and horrible feelings since I feel I love the baby already, I decided on a termination, because of many many reasons practical, financial etc, there's no way I could go through with this pregnancy realistically.

Since around the 1st Feb I've been having horrendous all day sickness. I had similar with my first I remember although not as bad as this. Back then I lost a ton of weight, lost teeth, was sick a lot all the way through, really anaemic. This is worse. worse )-: . I can keep literally NOTHING down apart from maybe a few digestive biscuits a day (none today) and I've been averaging a pint of sipped fluids a day and at least keeping that down (again, not today, today EVERYTHING has been coming up). I've lost count of how many times I vomit or retch - probably about 20 x a day. I'm only peeing a small amount twice a day or so and the other thing barely at all (sorry if TMI). I can barely sleep as I'm up about 3-4 times in the night most nights being sick. Have lost about a stone in 10 days )-: and was only 8st to begin with. Every time the sickness comes the cold sweats and shaking and dizziness.

I feel so weak. "D"P has done nothing to help at all. He's not even working and lives 5 mins away but I've been dragging myself the 2 hours a day walk to and from school with kids, housework (eldest been helping), cooking (boak!), everything, being sick in the street and in shops etc. He just says "I know" when I say he's not lifted a finger. My dad is coming over tonight cause I couldn't face an extra walk to the bank, but I've not told anyone in my family it's anything other than a bug and they live an hour or so away anyway.

I have the first appointment tomorrow for the termination, but I've been told they won't do anything on that day, I'll need to wait for another appointment (have been waiting since 2nd feb for this appointment). "D"P is picking up the DC whilst I go.

I don't know what I'm asking really, I just feel like I cannot go on like this, I'm so weak from not eating and even when not actually being sick, the awful nausea just builds and builds 24/7. I feel like I can't cope anymore )-; , and I'm no wuss but I've never felt as ill in my life. I feel like the sickness is overtaking everything, even my emotions about the termination etc, I just can't focus on anything other than getting through the days and I'm starting to get panic attacks as well and worry HOW ON EARTH WILL I COPE IF THEY SAY ANOTHER 7 OR 10 DAY WAIT. I feel so stupid and let down by the father. I wonder if I'll ever get over this.

Sorry I'm feeling really sorry for myself and rough I even have red spots round my eyes from pressure. If anyone has any advice or support to give it would be welcome, or even just support to get through this. Feel so alone.

[hellsbellsmelons]

It can't be an easy decision that's for sure.
I've never been in this situation so I honestly can't imagine what it must be like.
But you need to do what is best for you right now.
Hopefully the prescription will help with the sickness.
I wish you well.

[Bringiton2016]

I'm so relieved for you. I'm glad they were nice and you've got a prescription. Not long to wait now, then you can move on with your life. You're very brave

[RandomMess]

Glad it went well, very tough decision to have to make

Please come back for support whenever especially when it comes to binning the "P"

[Valentine2]

That's a ....... for sure! Fill here a choice word you feel like right at the moment OP because what I want to write is not going to pass mumsnet standards.
Here is a hug. Holding hands with you. Just go to a&e and ask for anti sickness ! They should be able to help you I am sure. I am on the other corner of the country. Wish I could help. Xxx

[Valentine2]

Wanted to write that fill it with a word for this bloody DP of yours.

[Sammythewondercat]

That's good news and you will hopefully feel a lot better soon. There's no way I could have coped with the sickness without support (I remember reading about how women used to die of hyperemesis in the past - think one of the Bronte sisters did - and when you feel that bad you can understand why!).
I had a termination many years ago - when my eldest was only 2 and my marriage was breaking down (husband went off with someone else) - it does hurt and I felt really guilty but at the time I had my son to think about and it would have been even more of a struggle as I had to find work (we had no money), childcare, somewhere to live .... and I was struggling with sickness - which came to an abrupt end straight after the op. The relief was amazing initially but obviously also sadness and guilt - but it was the right thing to do at the time (and that's all any of us can ever do).
Thinking of you x

[HumphreyCobblers]

You poor thing. I am glad you have some pills to help now. I hope you get through the whole process as easily as possible and your sickness stops.

Your DP is a complete arse, I would carry on hating him if I were you. How dare he be so callous and unhelpful.

[PeppasNanna]

How are you feeling today Op?
for you... x

[sosickandtired]

Thanks everyone for the support. x

I'm taking the cyclizine tablets as prescribed, I think they are helping somewhat, maybe cutting the vomiting episodes by about 1/3 and not really helping the general nausea "feeling" at all , it's better than nothing but I was hoping they'd be a miracle cure!

Still feeling grim, and have a horrible taste in my mouth and FAR too much saliva (which I have now found is another symptom of severe sickness). Soooo thirsty but can only really sip - when really I want to down 2 pints of water in one sitting! Did manage some broken sleep last night though.

I'm very relieved at how quickly they managed to get me seen though. I really don't think I would have coped if they'd said longer than a couple days, it's unbearable. I am looking forward to not feeling this awful sickness, but then again I'm aware of the emotional side and i will probably 'crash' after the procedure and feel awful about terminating. It's a catch 22.

Oh from the dating scan, the only time I could have conceived was when I had actually taken the Morning After Pill and it was 48 hours after the intercourse. So - DO NOT rely on the Morning After Pill effectiveness!!!

[LaceyLee]

Glad you are feeling slightly better and that they are being helpful. It's a horrible situation to be in. Is your do helping out yet?

[HumphreyCobblers]

Go to the pregnancy sickness support site, there is a list of effective medication. Cyclizine did not work for me but the next one in line did. Don't let them fob you off, the doctor I phoned said "well, there is nothing else to give you!" and I had to read the list out to her. I am not usually so assertive, but it really made me cross that I was expected just to put up with this when there are treatments out there.